https://vha.usc.edu/testimony/43764?from=search

עדות באדיבות visual history usa

נישא לאידית 6.1.47

WRITTEN FATE

Eliezer & Edit Chico

This book is the story of Eliezer and Edit Chico,

dedicated to the Memory of Chico & Klein families, and to the Heritage of the next generations with love and

pride.

ELIEZER

“In Thessaloniki, in the Sixteenth day of the month of February, in the year 1918, on a Friday, at 4 PM, A Mr. Chico Moshe, 30 years old, a barber by profession, a resident of the city of Thessaloniki, presented himself in- front of Mr. Yoanis Titiberius, the registrar of the municipality of the city Thessaloniki. He declared that in his home which is located at 55 Vasipbro road, on Twelve, of the month of February, in the year 1918, on a Monday, at 5 PM, Lea, his wife, from the Glidia family, has given birth to a baby boy, the Son of Chico Moshe. The Son has been given the name of: Eliezer. “

(This is the translation of Eliezer’s birth certificate from Thessaloniki, Greece).

“Lea, he is so black” said the aunts who were bending over the baby’s crib. “He was born in the fire” said my mother, “That’s why he is so black, the soot covered him”.

Eliezer remembers.

1.

Many long weeks, a cloud of soot was hanging over Thessaloniki, hiding the Sun, and crawling into all the corners and cracks. The inhabitants of Thessaloniki said: “The lord will burn the gentile who lid the oven and caused a fire in Thessaloniki”. They were referring to the English who set fire to the center of town, in order to prevent her falling into the hands of the German, who were only 40 km far from Thessaloniki. (This is the Eliezer’s explanation about the fire in 1917, which was the last year of 1st. WW. Wikipedia explains that the fire broke as a result of the first Turkish/Greece war which irrupted as part of the 1st. Balkan war: This

war started October 1912 in Montenegro and spread to Bulgaria, Serbia and Greece, later known as the Balkan league, fighting the Turks/Ottoman Empire, trying to get rid of Ottoman ruling, they succeeded and Greece conquered Thessaloniki after almost 500 years of Turkish ruling. The English did help Greece and the German were the Ottoman Empire (Turks) ally.

The big fire was the end of 6 difficult years that the Jews of Thessaloniki (and everyone else in Thessaloniki, of-course) had to endure. Thessaloniki was flinging in and out of war these 6 years.

First Thessaloniki was transferred from Turkish hands to the Greek hands, and the first to suffer were of course, the Jews. For years, Thessaloniki was a city with a Jewish majority. The Jewish community in Thessaloniki was the biggest and most important of Jewish communities in the big Ottoman Empire. It was also the only city in the world, where the port and the business & market centers, stopped working on Saturdays, that’s because most of the venders, the entrepreneurs, the carriers and the port workers, were Jewish. There is a legend about a ship arriving to Thessaloniki’s port on a Saturday, and since there were no dockworkers to unload its’ cargo, the ship’s captain sent messengers to Thessaloniki’s rabbi, so he could issue a special permit to the men, to unload the ship’s cargo.

When Greece gained control over all of Greece and Thessaloniki, in 1912, they forced ‘Hellenization’ all over, Jews were forced-out of many industries, Sunday has become the official rest day, and factories or business venues which didn’t work on Saturday, got fined. This was the year my sister Matilda was born. Two years later (1914) the Austro- Hungarian crown prince was assassinated in Sarajevo in Serbia, and the big war broke, this war was later called, the 1st. World War. Greece’s prime minister, Eleutherios Venizelos, who was in favor of the ‘Entente’ (the allies: France, Britain, USA, Italy and Japan), has offered Serbia, help. An Anglo-French military force landed on Thessaloniki shores. The Greek didn’t resist but were very unfriendly to the French and British soldiers. This force was too small and arrived too late and the operation to help Serbia, failed. After they failed, this force has retreated back into

Thessaloniki and just expropriated the area from the Greek government and imposed their military ruling so the city of Thessaloniki became a military logistic center of the ‘Entente’ counties.

Not long after that, the German bombed Thessaloniki from the air, using Zeppelins and then started ‘The big fire’.

In fact, the era that preceded the big fire – the World war years, had brought economic recovery to Thessaloniki because the city was a Transit-Station from the battlefield and to it and a source for supplies to all the regiments. Father had more-than-enough work, everyone needed a haircut, or shaving, cupping-glass treatments or blood-letting by leaches. Into all this abundance, my brother Videl was born (sometime between 1914 and 1917). Even before the battles ended, the city suffered the biggest blow – ‘The big fire’.

Most of the old city was ruined, ‘The big fire’ hurt especially, the Jewish residents, who were the old and center-city inhabitants. It left thousands without shelter and no income source. In the fire, my father lost two shops and a home, left with three children and nothing else. He had to start everything all over. That is how I started my life, from the bottom.

2.

My parents were decedents of Spain’s expulsion of the Jews (started at 1492), so their families were in Thessaloniki for generations.

The Ottoman Empire has invited the deportees to settle in the empire territories. According to what we know, the Sultan, Bayezid the 2nd., heard of the deportation of the Jews from Spain, and told his consultants that if the Spanish king was stupid, he (Bayezid the 2nd.) will be smart and will let them in to. His country. And so that he did. He invited the Jews to settle in the Ottoman Empire territories and gave them the same rights as the other many non-Muslims who lived in the Empire. In addition, for their different crafts, and their specialty in trade, the Jews also brought with them their special language: the ‘Ladino’ which is a

mixed Spanish (‘Spaniolit’) together with some Hebrew and some Aramaic.

In our house, we also spoke ‘Spaniolit’. My mother didn’t know Greece nor Turkish, only ‘Spaniolit’. In her parents’ house, she learned how to sew, how to cook and was taught to be a good home maker, a loyal wife and a devoted mother. My mother’s family was considered aristocratic (in the Jewish community, which was the majority in Thessaloniki prior to WWI). Her family: Menashe Befa, and Glidia. They had 7 children. Three daughters: Biz’u, Lea (my mother), and Dadon. Four boys: David, Yaakov, Avraham and Nasim.

From my grandparents, I only knew grandpa Glidia, my mother’s father. A wise man, his face slotted like an old olive tree, sitting on a stool, cleaning oil tins with caustic soda, which always made a rustle noise, ssssssss, when it dissolved the rest of the oil remaining in the tin and after that, he used to wash the tins, then weld the lid and then sell them. People stood in line to buy the tins, they used them for cheese, cucumbers, olives and pickled vegetables. This was the needed tool for storage. I too, had the chance to work for my mother’s brothers, doing that.

My father’s origin was from a poor family, the Chico family, Sara and Vidal Chico. They had eight children: Shmuel, Mushon (my father), Aharon, Avraham, David, and one daughter – Dodon. Chico’s men reputation preceded them, in the Jewish community, as strong, tough men who knew no fear or scare. A family legend tells the story of a thief who once came into my Grandfather’s Chico home. My Grandfather who noticed him but he didn’t call his boys. The day after he told his sons about the thief who ‘visited’ their home but also said: “If I had informed you when he was there, you would have killed him”.

My Father was also a tough man, broad shoulders, walking the streets of the city with guns stuck in his belt and his voice rolling as thunder. Everyone knew Mushon Chico, who played the Oud’s strings (the authentic middle eastern string playing, instrument), beautifully, and produced sounds which were sometimes mellow and brought tears and sometimes, very happy and cheerful until the legs jumped by themselves

and started dancing. He was a Barber and an expert in treatment of illnesses by using cupping-glass treatments or blood-letting by leaches. If someone got sick with Hepatitis, they brought him to Mushon Chico and he made a little cut under their tongue, squeezed and took out blood and in a few days, the patient got his health back. Also, there was no better expert than him for cupping-glass. He had this kind of machine which had six knives, he used to put these knives on ones back, turn the handle, and these knives blades would make small cuts on the back, on them, he placed the cupping-glasses in order to take out the ‘black blood’, the infection that caused the disease, or any common cold or fever which raised suddenly and its source was unknown.

For headaches, my father used to place leaches on one’s earlobe, fill it with leaches, they sucked the blood and fell. For treatment of ear ache, he would use an oiled rat fetus solution, that he made by placing rat fetuses with oil in a bottle, close it until the fetus would melt, and the solution that came out of it he would drip into the aching ear. These were treatments and medicine, which past, from generation to generation.

Father wanted me to learn how to be a barber, but I refused.

One of these days, Mushon saw Lea Menashe, and his heart’s strings shook like the Oud strings in his hands. ‘She will be my wife’ he said in his heart but mother’s family resisted his courting after her. Class difference was the reason. Father did not give up. Mushon Chico was not a quitter, he wanted Lea Menashe.

Every evening, he would present himself under her window and play Serenades for her. Mother’s brothers opened the window and spilled water on him but he did not flinch, this continued every evening but nothing helped. Eventually, father lost his patience, arrived one night and pulled out his guns and fired in the air. Mother’s brothers saw how determined father was, and said to mother: “Lea, there is no other alternative, we give you our consent to this marriage”. They gave mother the ‘Manillas de Oros’ – the gold bracelets that were given as a ‘Nedunia’ (dowry), to every girl from a good family. A ‘Hupa’ and ‘Kidushin’ (wedding) was

organized and that is how Lea from Menashe family, and Moshe Chico, came to be married.

Life smiled at my parents. Father had two shops, his reputation as a barber preceded him, and he saw blessing in his work. Mother nurtured the family home. At the year 1912, my sister Matilda was born, three years later was born my brother Vidal, father’s business blossomed but then the wheel turned. The fire spread very fast and within a few hours, destroyed all our property and possessions, and we remained without a roof or livelihood. And if that wasn’t enough, the Greek government took advantage of the opportunity and issued an expropriation order for all the areas that were affected by the fire. This expropriation order, has cancelled in-effect, the Jews ownership of their houses lots. Father has lost his work and to this black hole, I came into the world, a black baby. Mother used to sit me on a small chair in the bathroom, scrub me and place white talc on me, but nothing helped.

3.

The economic situation in Greece, got worse and worse. The world war ended but between Greece and Turkey the war continued. Greece’s economic situation was very bad, there was no money, only stamps. With these stamps, we would go to buy groceries. One of my first memories is from age four: my father had a Turkish friend named Memek, he lived in a narrow ally, in a poor home that its iron handle was connected to a rope. I remember entering Memek’s home (I don’t remember if I was with father or not) I remember Memek was sitting there with his legs crossed, an eastern way of sitting, he was making ‘tiaras’ (kites), I gave him a stamp which replaced money, and asked for a Tiara.

From the spacious home that my family lived in before the fire, we moved into a poor shed at the outskirts of the city, in a neighborhood of tents and sheds and tin-shacks, which was placed there for the people who suffered from the fire. There, my sister Sara was born. It was a poor area. Father arranged there a room with a mirror, kind of a barbershop, he hired a Turkish man to work at the shop, and he went to the port, where he had a

chair at some cafe shop where he shaved and cut the porters and the other port workers, hair. That is how he started earning a living again.

In the evenings, he used to go to port and play his instrument in the parties the dockworkers had, and we the kids used to hide in the corner and look at his fingers strumming rapidly on the Oud, producing sounds that made the listeners jump to dance and drink another shot of alcohol and another, the cheeks get red, and my father like melds into the sounds. At that moment, the man who frown at me, disappears. The man whose loud voice rolls around the entire house, who is preoccupied with the family’s livelihood, becomes soft and his face becomes tender and his wrinkles straight up.

Thanks God, father didn’t find out we were there watching him.

The situation at home was unbearable. More than everything I remember being hungry all the time. Not far from our home there was a shop where they manufactured ice-cream cones. I used to go and collect all the waffle’s waist inside a hat and fill up my belly, to ease it’s rumbling. I remember mother used to put more water inside the pot which she used to cook the ‘Frijola’ – the beans, in order to have enough for everyone. Or, she would buy the smallest fishes in the market, so she can have enough for all the hungry mouths, dip them into flour and in fried egg and even before she had a chance to take the fish of the frying pan, we already ate in voracity. Mother never made a comment about that, she saw we were hungry.

David, my father’s brother raised cows. We, as children of four or five years old, came to see David, came to the cowshed, take some of the sesame that the cows used to eat its shell and bring it to mother, so she can make ‘tahina’ (middle eastern sauce).

I used to go to the greengrocer (‘Yarkan’ in Hebrew) and take a carrot out of its pile, wipe with my clothes or on my pants and eat. After that, I would walk behind the wagons that carried the sacks of raisins, open the sack, put my hand inside, take a handful of raisins and fill my mouth with sweet raisins. Father saw I was hungry, but never said to me: ‘come in and take something from the simple porters’, restaurant’. He treated me with

toughness and strictness, he was very hard on me, not with my brother, only with me, I was the black kid! I didn’t know what candy was, until I reach Ten years of age.

A person who was never hungry, who never suffered from that, doesn’t know the world. I was hungry not only during the war but also when I was a kid. The most vivid memory of my childhood is the hunger memory.

The war between Greece and Turkey ended, the Greeks retreated from all the territories in Small Asia, the ones that they controlled up to that moment and in the treaty which was reached between Greece and Turkey, they agreed on population exchange. Hundred- thousands of Greek refugees arrived into Greece and the Greek government settled tens of thousands of them in Thessaloniki. The town was flooded with refugees who had nothing who naturally resided in the poor neighborhoods at the outskirts of the city of Thessaloniki. They used to say that the Greeks who came were so poor that they brought only lice from Turkey.

Mother cried that she cannot keep raising children in this poverty neighborhood. People did not want to rent apartments to families with children and mother said to my father: “Mushon, look, we are a family with 4 children, no one wants to rent us a flat, what will we do?” Father started looking for a solution.

The Greeks wanted us to leave and so they gave us a small lot at another area. Father borrowed money, sold mother’s ‘Manillas de Oros’, and build us a home out of wood and bricks, a five-room house and a kitchen. The stove and heating in the kitchen, was fed by wet charcoal which raised thick smoke. Mother worked hard a fire started under these charcoals, but that was what we could obtain.

Father loved chickens and he loved the garden. He raised chickens which provided both eggs and meat, planted vegetables and flowers. Father also knew how to graft plants and he did that with roses, he also built us a ‘Suka’ in the back yard. The house opened into a corridor that in both sides were rooms. At the end of this corridor, there was a small hall with a table, where father sat with neighbors after a days’ work, having conversations about this and that, arguing about politics and daily news, all that as they

were cracking kernels, drinking ‘Arak’ or eating called watermelon and smoking cigarettes or ‘Nargila’. On that table, father used to chop the Tabac leaves. He took a big stack of those leaves and over there on the table, holding the knife between his thumb and his index finger, smooths with gentle movements, he sliced them very thin, like thickness of hair. (Today, when I cut salad, I remember how father used to cut, and my hand, unintentionally, performs the same movements). Almost all rooms in the house were rented.

The center of the Tabac industry, was in Greece, and many Jews came from Turkey, from Skopje, and from Yugoslavia, to work in the Tabac industry since they earned good money in that. These people looked for rooms to rent and paid father with Gold. It was good money. Opposite our house there was a shed where every Saturday, the Turkish men who resided in our neighborhood, assembled for wrestling matches and physical struggles. We kids, used to snick our way inside the shed which was immersed by cigarettes smoke, stand among the sweaty men, and watch the strugglers whose upper body, which was muscle laced, shined of oil, and their lower body, was stretched in a long, rubber pants. The Turks, were known as wrestlers and good physical strugglers, so this was a kind of Saturday’s recreation which attracted all the neighbors and their children.

While father was treating me very harshly, didn’t understand me and hit me many times, mother on the other hand, treated me with softness.

In the neighborhood we lived in, there was a crazy person who used to take chickens and decapitated their heads and eat them. I was scared of him, every time I saw him, I used to run to mother, she used to hug me and calm me down. We had a very close connection, my mother and I.

4.

My parents, like most Thessaloniki’s Jews, were traditional. Father prayed ‘Shacharit’ (morning prayer) at home and ‘Minca’ (noon prayer) and ‘Arvit’ (evening prayer) he prayed with my brothers at the synagogue. I

didn’t want to pray. Also, on Fridays, my father and my brothers used to go to synagogue, (sometimes I did join the men of my family to synagogue on Fridays) all that while mother used to prepare the ‘Shabbat’ table, lid the candles and cover the ‘Hallas’ (The Jewish Shabbat bread). When they returned, we used to sit and eat our ‘Shabbat meal’. Even in the days we were very poor, mother did her best to prepare delicious food from the very little we had.

On Saturday morning, again they went to Synagogue and after prayer, it was family visit time, visits that could not take place during the week, due to lack of time and other things. We celebrated all the holidays: ‘Pesach (Passover) was the holiday that the preparations for, started at the end of ‘Purim’ (the costumes Jewish holiday). In Thessaloniki they used to say: “Bendiche La Limpieza de Noche de Pesach” – “May the cleaning of Pesach night be blessed”.

These preparations included also the whitewashing of the house inner walls, and a thorough cleaning from the ground up – that was mother’s work, who almost collapsed under the load of work leading up to the holiday. From ‘Purim’ to ‘Pesach’, the house was mother’s exclusive kingdom.

When ‘Rosh Hodesh Elul’ (the first day of the Hebrew month of Elul) arrived, father used to shake us out of bed even before crack of dawn: “Come to ‘Selichot’” (forgiveness prayers) he used to call out. Against my will, I dragged after my father and after my brothers, my eyes only half open and I am complaining about the early wake. On ‘Yom-Kippur’, father forced us to fast and be in synagogue all day. Many times, I used to get out of that and join my friends who they too, found that prayers and Synagogue don’t interest them, especially when the street and its temptations were more appealing.

I didn’t make my father happy. I was a wild child who wandered the streets. Father placed ‘Zdaka money’ (charity money) many times in the ‘Zdaka box’ in Synagogue. When I grew up, I said in my heart: ‘Meshuga’ (his crazy), ‘I ask my father for money and he doesn’t give it to me. This is unaccepted’. It really made me angry, so I became a thief and stole from

the ‘Zdaka’ box. Father and I had many arguments and fights. We did not get along and many times I felt his beating…

5.

At the age of six, I was sent to a Jewish school called: ‘Skola Atas’, owned by Pinto Versano & Masia Atas. During week days the schooling lasted from 8 am. In the morning until 4 pm. In the afternoon. On Fridays we studied only 5 hours. The major language we studied in was of course, Greek. We had a few hours a week Hebrew lessons which included Bible lessons, prayers and customs and in addition, we also studied French. So, I knew four languages: Greek – the official language, Spaniolit – the language we spoke at home and which we wrote in Hebrew letters, Hebrew and French. The regime at school was very strict. Discipline was forced by different punishments, including whipping our hands and fingers with a ruler.

Almost from my first days at school, I understood that school and I, were not meant for each other. Most of the time I was not in class, I knew that if the ‘Gong’ rings and you were not there – you could not enter the classroom. I used to walk to school, catch one of my friends and hold him so he will not continue to school. It was boring to skip school alone, it’s better with company… We used to wander around, carrying our school bag on our back or hand, mixing into the colorful hustle of the city, on our way to the port which was teeming with life, full of ships in the docks, fishing boats on their way back from sea, swinging on the waves. Also, there were porters loading and unloading merchandise, a much interesting world from the boring class room.

One day, we came to the sea shore and I was sunk in observing the boats and the active happening at the port that I slipped and fell into the sea with my school bag in my hand. All day I wandered around in the sun so my notebooks dry up and so my father won’t find out, God forbid, that I ran away from school. Father was very strict with me. I used to ask father for a little money so I can buy candy or go to the cinema – I loved movies – but he didn’t give it to me. I was willing to learn if he would promise he

will give me money for cinema on Friday or Saturday but he never promised and would not give me any money. Maybe, if he would have treated me differently, I wouldn’t do what I did, I would go to the store and steel notebooks without the store owner feel, then I would sell them, by some marbles, play marbles and no one could defeat me (I even played marbles with my grandson, and he asked me: “Grandfather, how do you know this so well?”) I earned marbles and sold them and this way I had money to go have fun or watch the rest of the movie I wanted to see.

In the days I did go to school and entered the classroom, I used to bend down so I will not be seen, I hardly heard the calling, nor knew how to answer the teacher’s questions. Out of boredom, nothing to do or desire to stand out, I disturbed the process of the lesson until the teacher used to say: “Chico, go outside”. At school there were Greek teachers whom we used to drive crazy. One of these days, a gentile Greek guy arrived and he came to revenge the trouble we gave the teachers. He placed some boys in a row and started hitting them one by one. I saw that this was his method, so I passed without him feeling that, from the row of those who were not hit yet, to those who were already spanked…

During my summer vacation, I worked, either for my uncles by cleaning the oil tins which were sold as a storage vessel or at the tailor’s or carpenter’s. I earned little money which I gave mother most of it but a little was left in my hands and it gave me a sense of freedom.

The school headmaster was an acquaintance of mother, he called her and said: “There is nothing to do with the boy, when he is in school, it’s a waste of time”. Poor mother got worried thinking what will become of this boy in life, how will he manage, but I did manage. At the age, often when I left school, I thought to myself, ‘I am wasting my time at school, there will be no blessing from me, home needs my salary, and I am a diligent and good worker’. Everywhere I worked they loved me and asked me to come back. I started working for the tailor, I sewed, I ironed, I had good hands and an open mind. I worked also for a carpenter and built chairs. I also worked for what my grandfather worked – cleaned the tins, worked for my uncles, worked at the factory that made those tins, I didn’t despise any job. The world has opened to me and suddenly I had money

in my pocket. I could give some money at home and still had enough to dress up, for recreation; I was happy and full of life, I loved to have a good time, to dance, laugh and sing.

Thessaloniki was a vibrant city. It was full of people outside. The streets and coffee shops were teemed with people. I used to sit with friends at coffee shops, have a beer or a shot of ‘Raki’, take the newspaper, hold it upside down and tell stories I invented, like it is written in the paper; at the cinema they screened films so I went with friends and watched movies as much as I wanted. I used to buy one ticket, get in, walk to the emergency doors, open them and let more friends in. We were looking for excitement so I connected with some boys who were what you would call: ‘bad company’. We played cards and when I was low on money, I broke into the ‘Keren-Kayemet’ money box, and took what I wanted. (Keren- Kayemet box was everywhere in Jewish communities. The money was meant for buying lands in ‘Eretz Israel’ for Jews). Father would find the open money box, ask who opened it, but he had no doubt who did that and he gave me a good share of beating. Many beatings I suffered from my father’s hands, and today I bless my father for all the spanking, I was one who needed that. Sometimes, I used to hide under the table so father won’t find me, mother used to cover for me and say I am sleeping. Mother watched over me and was very worried for me, she used to say: “How will this child grow up with no confidence, getting beaten by his father, what will become of the boy?”. If she saw me in my adulthood, after I arrived in this country and got established, she would probably be proud of me.

One of those days I sat with friends who smoked pot, I didn’t smoke and the friends started teasing me for not smoking: “You are not a man! You are not a man!” they said. “I will try” I replied. ‘What could happen?’, I thought to myself. I took some Hashish and didn’t feel anything. Nothing happened. ‘That’s all?’ I thought to myself, so, I placed more Hash in, smoked it and started to feel bad. My intestines ‘rolled over’, my legs shivered like jelly, I couldn’t walk, so I said to my friends: “I don’t feel well, help me”. They took me arm in arm, and brought me home, the distance was short but it seemed like forever. My father who sat in his chair in the corridor, as usual, saw me and said: “What is with you, that

you come home so early, it’s only nine in the evening? You never come home before twelve at night.” I said: “It’s nothing father, nothing”, and I immediately entered the room, using my very last energy, fell on my bed and decided: No more! fortunately, I was lucky this time. In the other times when my friends took me to places where they smoked ‘Nargila’, they used to put Hashish in it and pass it from one to the other, each one would suck on it, I would put my mouth on it and pretend I am smoking, so they won’t say I am not a man. Everywhere there is bad company, it depends who gets caught, its luck, like casting lucky dice. It depends how one casts the dice.

6.

The situation of the Jews in Thessaloniki, has deteriorated. Together with many refugees who arrived from ‘Asia Minor’, arrived those who started to spread antisemitism in the city. In the Summer of 1931, there was a series of antisemitic outbursts. First it started with incitement in the traditional antisemitic press and then through hanged notices which were placed in different places in the city, calling to deport the Jews from Thessaloniki. It continued by beating Jews, Jewish stores looting, systematically marking Jewish homes and the end was by organized systematic harassments by rioters who entered the Jewish neighborhoods, hurting Jews and burning their homes. The worst of these events was an attack by a Greek crowd – about 8,000 people, which were mainly refugees from ‘Asia Minor’ – on one of the Jewish neighborhoods named: ‘Campbell’. Even though there was a force of the local police present, the rioters managed to burn tens of houses, the synagogue and the neighborhood school. They hit many Jews and injured about twenty of them.

In the year 1933, upon the rise of the Nazis to government in Germany, the antisemitic manifestation became stronger and at home they spoke of ‘Eretz Israel’, my father wanted to make ‘Aliya’ to ‘Eretz Israel’. From time to time, he went to the ‘Federation la Commita’ (kind of a Jewish federation for helping the community) – there, they told him: “We don’t

need barbers in ‘Eretz Israel’, we need porters, carriers”, and they send him back home. If he would have made it here, he would have done very well, my father was more than a doctor, he knew how to treat hepatitis, how to use cupping glass to heal people and he knew many things, he would have succeeded here, but the luck didn’t let him, that was his destiny.

My brother also thought that it would be better in ‘Eretz Israel’. He was still a bachelor and in 1933 he decided to go to ‘Eretz Israel’ as a tourist. I gave him a guitar I earned, he sold it and arrived in Tel Aviv, but It was bad here, the heat and the hard work exhausted him and he could not hold on and returned to Thessaloniki. I was prepared to follow him, I had the money from work, but when he came back, I cancelled my plan.

A year after my brother came back from Israel, in the year 1934, my mother died. For years mother suffered from lung disease. When the Greeks performed their pogroms against the Jews, my parents found shelter in the basement of one of my mother’s, sisters’ home. The basement was humid and wet, (so much, that my father’s, ouds’ skin has disintegrated from the humid). The stay in that basement had worsened my mother’s situation and she caught and spit blood. I wanted to send her to a healing place, I had the money because I planned to travel to ‘Eretz Israel’, and my plan as I said did not come to happen, so I said to my mother, I have the money, take it to recuperate, but it was no longer helpful.

I was sixteen when my mother passed-away. Life in Thessaloniki were getting harder and harder. There was serious unemployment, wages went down but food prices went up. Thessaloniki’s streets got filled with protesters and governments rose and fell. In the year 1935, a ‘revulucia’ – revolution happened – an army coup failed and the king was brought back from his exile and appointed Metaxas – who was before, minister of war – to Prime minister. In a very short time, Metaxas declared a state of emergency and on August 4th, 1936, he dissolved the government and the parliament and declared new regime. That was called: ‘The 4th of August Regime’. In this regime he declared himself a single ruler. All the other political movements, including the antisemitic movement called: ‘Tria

Epsilon’, were outlawed. The newspapers where the regime propaganda was published, have presented Metaxas as ‘The first laborer’, ‘The first agriculturist’ and ‘Father of the Greek nation’.

Greece started to recover financially and that brought an improvement in the Jews situation as well. Their situation improved so good, that even those who left before to ‘Eretz Israel’ at the time of the riots, came back to Greece also because of the bloody riots that started in ‘Eretz Israel’ (it was of course then still called: ‘Palestine-Eretz Israel’ under the British mandate). And I prayed for the day when they will enlist me into the army…

7.

In the year 1939, I joined the army. I wanted to enlist. Every morning, I used to get up, put my hand on the ‘mezuza’ and ask: ‘When will I go to the army?’ I was fed up with the routine, I was like a robot, day in and day out, all the same: get up in the morning, go to work, return from work, meet friends, I was a happy and jolly fellow, but I wanted change, I wanted an experience, I wanted out of this monotonous life, I felt, I was ready for adventures and I was not afraid of anything.

In the world at that time, there was pre-war atmosphere. The newspapers and radio reported about the ‘Anschluss’ – the union between Germany and Austria. They reported about France, and Britain’s surrender to Hitler’s demand to rip the Sudetenland from Czechoslovakia’s hands and annex it to Germany. The newspapers of course also reported when Germany took control on all of Czechoslovakia. The official press was in favor of Germany. The events in the world felt far-away from us, not concerning us, even when they were in Europe, but, when Italy, Germany’s ally, gained control over Albania and stood along the border with Greece, we started to feel that the world turmoil is getting closer. So, although there were rumors in the air, court orders appeared in the papers, and announced that speculation, profiteering and food accumulation is forbidden. The government’s notices have clarified that Greece is not intervening in the world’s noise.

When my day to enlist into the army arrived, I presented myself in the absorption camp in Thessaloniki, together with hundreds of Jews and gentiles from all around Greece. I was very pleased that they placed me, like most Jewish soldiers, in the Artillery corps and not in the Infantry. The Artillery soldiers were considered higher level than the infantry soldiers, and there I was, waiting impatiently for the beginning of my adventure journey, away from home, far away from father’s authority and shadow.

They uploaded us on the trucks and took us to the training camp, which was about 60 km. far from Thessaloniki. There, we were supposed to stay for four months and transfer, from civil citizens into – Soldiers.

Unintentionally or not, I was added to a team of three other Jews, and fast enough, I learned that their past, how to say this gently… was not clean. I worked before and didn’t get into trouble with the law, but they had a social stigma, that they reconfirmed with their behavior. One of those days, we left together for shooting practice and there was another guy with us, a gentile of Turkish descent. Between shooting rounds, we noticed that the guy is eating pretzels, so one of my team mates turned to him and asked if he could have some pretzels. The Turk looked at him with contempt and squirt between his teeth: “G’id”. That was a word meant to denigrate, in a derogatory sense. That was an insult that could not go unpunished. My friend turned to me and hissed from between his lips: “Stick to him”, I did that and distracted him and as I was speaking and turning his attention to me, my friend walked over to him, opened the guy’s safety-pin, which was attached to his wallet and gave me the guy’s wallet behind his back. I took the wallet, moved away several meters, took out his money and through away the wallet, then I returned to the group as if nothing happened. Not many moments past and the guy touched his thigh and… Oh no! no wallet. “My wallet! my wallet was stolen” he started shouting and running all over. The officer in charge heard the screaming and came to see what is going on, what happened, what is all the fuss about. When he heard what it is about, he positioned us all in an army formation. The officer already knew my team friends, so it was obvious that the suspicion will fall on them: “Number three, number seven

and number ten, leave the row”, he commanded my friends. They took one step forwards, showing innocent face like a baby, the officer checked in their tools and of course did not find anything. The officer announced to the guy and to all of us: “There is nothing, you probably lost your wallet”. The officer was not stupid, he understood we did a ‘Sting’ act on the Turkish guy, he knew him, he knew that guy is antisemitic and a Jew hater and on the other hand, the officer loved us. He scattered the formation, called me aside and said: “Chico, go ‘eat’ the money with Shmuel” (one of my friends), meaning: ‘go waste the money and for no one to know about It’.

The days past, we practiced disassembling and assembling of the cannons. Every four guys were a team on a canon. These were canons that were built to take apart and transport on mules. On each mule there was a kind of a body harnessed on which we placed the canon parts. We disassembled the canon into seven parts, each part weight was about 120 kg., and in the battle field we needed to assemble the parts. We practiced to do the job of taking apart and reassembling it, in the shortest time possible. We loaded the parts on the mules, took them off the mules, and did everything as fast as we could and with coordination between us. Part of the time the training was dedicated to take care of the horses and mules. There were a hundred horses in the stables and the treatment included cleaning the stables, feeding them, changing the platform on which the animals stood, cleaning their horseshoes, washing the horses and brushing them from their neck to their tail. We had to do these jobs in the afternoon, when it was humid, hot and sticky.

Like any soldier who tries to evade work, I too looked and found. I noticed that there are exemptions from treating the horses. All the guys who came from villages and who didn’t know how to read and write, were assembled at school in the afternoons, where they were taught the basics of reading and writing. I said: “I too, can’t read or write”, and they added me to the others at school and so in the afternoons, instead of cleaning the horses, I sat on the student bench. They taught us from basics: E, O, A…

The officer was a local and he saw that I am progressing more than the others, so he told me to take one of those who had difficulty, and help him.

Some of them were very primitive. We used to laugh on their behalf and said to them: “Look how we manage to turn off a lamp like one puts out a candle”, then one of us used to blow on the lamp and the other at the same time turned off the switch and look at the wonder… the lamp ‘stopped burning’. The poor guys tried their best in blowing on the lamp and didn’t understand why they are not successful…

This is how we trained for four months.

In Europe a war was already taking place. Hitler advanced and conquered country after country almost with no one to disturb him. Mussolini wanted to show Hitler, that Italy is also a superpower in the Mediterranean spare, and that he is an equal ally and tried to drag Greece into the war although the Prime-minister, Metaxas, whose ideology was closer to the Germans, tried to keep Greece out of the world conflict. The Italians started provocations. In August 1940, the Italians, have made a Greek war ship, sink. Its name was ‘Elli’ which was anchored at the Tinus port, due to a religious celebration. Even though everyone knew this was an Italian provocation, Prime-minister Metaxas was not dragged to war. All around Greece people sang a song saying: “You Sunk one ship, Greece has many ships” (kate Ipogus Kate Protiforgus Chaste Patani).

They took us to the village Veria which was located only 60 km. west to Thessaloniki, close to the border with Albania, to threaten the Italians and present power but then everything calmed down so we went back to continue our training.

The training period has ended and I was sent to officers’ school, in the airport of Thessaloniki, to take care of the horses. It was an amazing position. Every day, I was sent to the bakery to bring bread for the officers. Twenty kilo of bread every day. The officers had an abundance of bread. They sold their loafs of bread, each loaf weight was 2 kg., I bought their loaves cheap and sold them in the city for good profit. This was a good arrangement for everybody, we all profited from it. In addition to my daily walk to the bakery, I had to travel up to the mountains to bring twigs for the brooms. I used to take a horse, connect it to the wagon, take my sit on the bench and “Dio! let’s go!” I yelled to the horse. The horse started

galloping, the wind was whistling and blowing in my face, it was an amazing sensation of freedom. No soldiers around, no officers, just me and the horse alone. We climbed the mountain, I looked at the sparkling sea down there which looked like it has thousands of stars. I quickly loaded the twigs on the wagon, the horse seems to feel the liberty from his brothers at the stables as well, and he rushes downhill, the wagon tosses from side to side in the back, and we reach the sea. I tie the horse and spend hours to my pleasure. No one supervised my return.

In the officers’ school, I connected with one Greek officer, a gentile named Chakia. A tall and good looking, guy and despite our difference in rank, we found a ‘common language’. In the evenings, when Chakia had to check the guards, to inspect and make sure the soldiers are watch everything properly, we used to get on a horse, do the inspection and on our way back we used to stop by the vineyard, tie the horse to a fence, go in and pick grapes, sit and eat until we were full, chat and enjoy. And al if a sudden: WAR!

8.

In the evening of October 28th, the ambassador of Italy in Athens, has presented an ultimatum from Mussolini to Prime-minister Metaxas, demanding a free passage for his soldiers in order to conquer ‘strategic points’ in the depth of the Greek territory. Metaxas rejected the ultimatum and said: ‘Ochi’-No! Within three hours the Italian army attacked Greece. In the Radio we heard the Prime-minister’s speech saying: “It is time Greece will fight for her independence. Greeks! Now we must prove ourselves worthy to our ancestors… fight for your homeland, for your wives, for your children”.

The speech has lifted everyone’s spirit, the calling: “Avenge Tinus” was heard everywhere. In the officers’ school, Chakia called me and said: “An order has arrived, we need to get to Veria with the mules”. I replied: “The order didn’t state when we should arrive, let’s walk slowly”. We took the mules, left the officers’ school and started making our way slowly towards Veria. We passed through home, I said goodbye to my father, I assured

him that I am well equipped, and we continued on our way. Every few kilometers, we stopped to rest. The citizens opened their homes to us and also their stables and this way we progressed very slowly towards Veria, the same village we were taken to a few months earlier, when the Italian started their provocations at Greece.

I knew Veria, it’s a beautiful town sitting on the cliff in the lower parts of the mountains surrounding Thessaloniki. When I was fifteen, I worked in a clothing store and once a year we would take merchandise to a yearly bazaar that took place in Veria. It was a nice and vibrant place.

After five days of walking, Chakia and I, arrived at the camp in Veria. We entered and found a hectic scene. What ‘Churba’… people running around, trucks standing and people loading equipment on them, others rolling cannons, loading wagons, soldiers marching with their belongings on their backs, steel helmets on their heads, rifles on their shoulders, ready to go to battle. Commanders shouting orders, horses rejoicing and the mule voices, in a nutshell: chaos all over (in Hebrew Eliezer said: ‘God’s chaos’)

I suggested to Chakia, that we should go sit in a cafe in the center of town, until the chaos calms down. “What’s the rush?” I said, “We will sit and wait for everyone to go ahead, we can take our time before we meet the bombs”. He accepted and we waited two, three days, the camp emptied- out and then we presented ourselves. We were placed in the kitchen, Chakia, as the officer in-charge and I, together with few other fellows who cooked, we were all sent to the front. There were no horses, nor any other means of transport, so we walked, day and night we walked towards the border with Albania. From a far, we heard the bombs voices. This was the first time I ever heard bombing. As we got closer, the tension and concern inside of me grew. Boom! and another Boom! the earth shook, the world was shocked. We climbed a hill, and saw a terrifying sight. The first thing I saw was a shirt with a hole in it. For a moment I wasn’t sure what I was looking at, then I realized it was a soldier, an Italian dead soldier and next to him, another one and another one. Italian, soldiers’ bodies were scattered all over, next to them, were canned goods.

We said: “What kind of army is this?”. They had a good time, they sat and played the Mandolin, didn’t want to fight. The Greeks were known as good soldiers, fearlessly, who don’t give up, they can be satisfied with a piece of bread and some cheese for 24 hours and still keep fighting. It was awful. The Italians had tanks and we only had canons, the Italians bombed us from the air and the infantry soldiers entrenched themselves and from these trenches they attacked. We were more determined than the Italians, we attacked them and made them retreat into Albania. The rain and the snow made all roads muddy, as we progressed into Albania, the weather became more and more difficult. We were in the middle of Winter, up in the mountains of Albania, three thousand meters high it was freezing called. Snowstorms buried the infantry soldiers in their trenches and many of them suffered from leg stagnation and eventually lost their legs to amputation. We struggled to elevate the mules with the cannons, through the snow and mud, they drowned in the mud, refusing to keep on walking, we too sunk in the mud, some of the mules stumbled and some of the cannon’s parts fell over. Every part weight was over hundred and twenty kilograms, so one of us held the mule and the other three tried to lift the part back on the harnessed. With frozen hands we assembled the parts while the snow hits our faces and we are underdressed. Sometimes the cannons did not work, and we had to dismantle them again and reassemble from scratch. We were at the end of the world, on a mountain peak, there was no way ahead nor backwards.

Once I was about to be sent to the front, to be with the ‘breaking into’ unit. I was scared. Death was all around. At night I dreamt of my mother: ‘Don’t be scared, Eliezer’ she said to me in my dream, ‘Tomorrow you need to open front, don’t be scared’. I woke up the following morning with confidence, took the mules and was about to set foot but as I was preparing the equipment, an officer approached me (at this stage I was not with Chakia anymore, but with another officer) and he said to me: “Take your mules and go to back to the home-front to bring food for the soldiers”. I did as he told me, returned after two, three days after the attack has finished. Mother kept me safe.

There was food shortage, clothing shortage, we took clothes from dead soldiers, there was no other alternative. We sent letters home, but the packages they sent us, didn’t arrive. Thousands of Jewish soldiers fought there, many of them returned with amputated limbs that froze, heart in body and mind, many, many of them were sent two years later, to the crematorium. Tragedy over tragedy.

In January Mussolini, arrived to supervise directly on the Italian, soldier’s fighting. He could not understand how is it that they are unable to overcome the Greeks, but it did not help. The Italians didn’t fight.

In Athens the Prime-minister, Metaxas, had died suddenly from blood poisoning. The rumors said that the English had poisoned him. In Greece there was a song which said: “Every minister, every Prime-minister gets lost…”. We were still deep in the mud, snow and frost of Albania.

In March 25th, on Greek’s Independence Day, there was a heavy air strike on us. From the top of the mountain where we were, I saw the Italian airplanes dive and throw rain of bombs, bombing the supply convoy. Later, I learned that during two hours, these airplanes shot one hundred thousand bombs! Thousands of soldiers died in this bombing attack, they had no chance, they were buried with blankets, But, even this attack did not break us, Greek’, army soldiers. Mussolini had ordered them to abandon the attack and left Albania, back to Italy. My officer also decided that we need to go back to Thessaloniki.

We went back through Veria, on our way we entered one of the stables, there was no one home, we took the horse who was waiting in the stable and in Veria, I sold him for 500 drachmas. We took off our uniforms and put on civilian clothes. In April 1941, I was back in Thessaloniki. I was one of the first soldiers who returned to Thessaloniki, from the war in Albania.

9.

On April 6th 1941, the Germans conquered Greece and, on the 9th, they entered Thessaloniki. Thessaloniki was their key to Africa. They invaded Greece through Bulgaria and through Yugoslavia. The English, who were suppose, to help Greece, retreated or were taken into captivity. The German entrance to Greece was very loud. Powerful explosions were heard all over the city. Thessaloniki residents burned the refineries in order to prevent the Germans from getting any fuel. In the streets we could see the German soldiers marching with their flag, with its swastika on it, moving with the wind.

A short while after the occupation forces entered, we felt the shortage. Even before the occupation, factories and production-plants have shut down because of the war, many consumer products were missing in the markets. Now, since the German forces entered, they have confiscated anything they could put their hands on: Grain-warehouses, cotton and agriculture goods and, if that wasn’t enough, then in the year 1941, there was also a severe drought.

Long lines dragged out near the food distribution points, in order to receive an allowance of salt, some matches, bread from dark wheat and 70 grams of ‘Babota’ (corn bread). People were looking for food in the Trashcans, on the streets people were dying from hunger. We sold things from our home to the farmers in exchange for some food. Some wheat to prepare bread. Many of Thessaloniki’s residents – young and old, Women and children – walked all the way to the villages around, either to work there or to buy some vegetables or dairy products because in the city, one could not get anything. I had a friend from the army who lived in one of those villages, I went to him, he gave me fifty kilograms of corn. I carried the sack on my back and walked 40 kilometers until I reached Thessaloniki. Another friend, one from the days in elementary school – who became later on, my brother-in-law, he was my first wife brother – he prepared buns from the corn bread, we placed them into sacks, and went to Langella, a village on the border between Bulgaria and Greece. We sold the buns to the Bulgarians and bought tins of oil which we placed inside

the sacks and covered it with salt so the German guards won’t see what we are carrying in our tools and won’t discover the oil tins. We carried it on our backs, walked on foot all the way to Thessaloniki and there we sold the oil. This is how we managed to earn some money so we can buy some food.

One of those days, a short while after I returned from Albania, I sat with friends around a table in one of the Coffee shops in center-city, one of the only ones, which remained open after the Germans had entered Thessaloniki. The cafes’ tables, were scattered on the pavement and only few customers sat around them. It was almost evening and the heat of the day had started fading away and a light Breeze was bowing from the sea. On the low tables coffee and water glasses started piling up, the ashtray was full of cigarette butts. We were a small group of people who experienced the horror of war, we could not share what happened with anyone in the family, only people who were there can understand our mood, could understand our pain under what looked like humorous environment. Each one of us told what happened to him in the war, where he was and what had happened. We also spoke of the new situation with the Germans in the city and tried to guess what will bring the next day and everyone started raising guesses and speculations. As we speak, and my eye caught a figure of a young woman, hat on her head, wearing a summer-dress, approaching us. At the beginning I didn’t recognize her but the girl spotted me and stopped and said: “Hey Eliezer, why are you so serious?”. Rachel, this was Rachel, whom I loved from the age of fourteen. Only someone who experienced such a big love, knows what love is. She was Moshe’s younger sister, Moshe who studied with me at ‘Skola Atas’, actually we both didn’t visit school too much, we preferred to go to the sea-shore to see the boats with the musical players and to sneak into the cinema to watch movies and do all kinds of mischiefs. Both he and I left school in an early age and went to work. Moshe started working in a bakery shop (After we made Alia to this country, he opened a bakery shop in Haifa). He was the one who prepared the corn wheat buns which we sold in Langella.

I could see that she hasn’t forgotten me so I decided to go on with my love. Before the war, her father didn’t want me. I did not come from an Elite family, my parents were poor and in back in those days, I was a punk, but I returned from the war a different person, the army straitened me out. Her Father saw she wants me, and that I have changed and became serious, so he gave his consent to my courting her.

In my family, we knew what can be the consequences, when a family objects to a loving couple. My sister, Matilda, had met a guy, they fell in love and wanted to marry, but the guy’s father, demanded that Matilda bring a dowry, money. He needed money to sustain his business. The guy was dependent on his father and was not strong enough to stand up to him and insist on his love, and it brought a separation. Matilda was broken, all day she used to sit in her room and cry. One day she went to the beach, jumped into the waves and tried to kill herself. People who were at the area, saw her and pulled her out of the water. She survived but was never recovered. Every day I invited her to my home, so she can be with my wife, to eat with us, so she will not be alone. When my brother Vital got married and had a daughter, he took Matilda to his home to take care of his daughter. They all perished in the crematorium. But back then we did not know this will be the end of everybody.

At the beginning, Jewish life under German occupation was tolerable. They were off-course full with annoying bothering and harassment, but no rules had yet come out especially against Jews. The big hardship was the hunger and the shortage.

10.

On July 11th, 1942, the journey of Agony for Thessaloniki’s Jews, had started. It’s ending was elimination.

The army commander of the city, ‘Von Kranski’, had ordered all the men, age 18 to 45, to present themselves at 8 am. At the ‘Eleftherias Square’ – the square of liberty – and threatened to cast severe punishments on those who don’t come. It was a burning hot summer day, we wore our Shabbat

clothes, and presented ourselves as we were ordered. Thousands of men crowded together in lines, tight next to each other, surrounded by S.S. men.

I was standing there with these men. The sun burned, we stood there for long hours, they didn’t let us cover our heads, wear a hat to protect us from the sun, they didn’t allow us to drink water or even sit down. Men dropped, and fainted around me, the police did not enable giving them any help. After a few hours, the police officers removed a few men from our lines and forced them to perform ‘exercises’ until they reached exhaustion. Anyone who showed any signs of fatigue, was bitten with no mercy on his head, face, back. Around the square, stood German officers and soldiers, laughing and clapping their hands.

Group by group, we were lead, into one of the offices where they wrote our names and equipped us with a working card and an identity number.

A few days later, I was called for forced labor. I was sent together with a group of men to Karterini, at the foot of the Olympus, about 80 km. from Thessaloniki. We had to place down train tracks. The work was hard and exhausting under the burning sun of Summer, twelve hours a day, very little and insufficient food, but the guarding was very tight. I went to the Olympus to look for Partizans – resisters to the German occupation, but could not find any, they were not yet organized. I had a connection with Greeks who were at that region, a connection that was formed in my army days. One of them used to take wheat sacks from warehouses in that area and bring them to me to sell in the nearest train station, about four km. from the labor camp, we used to split the profits. He waisted his share in card- games while I kept the money we earned.

One of these nights I dreamed my father died. My father was a heavy smoker, as a result of that, a necrosis formed in his leg and the doctors said his leg must be amputated. Father refused and objected in full force, the necrosis spread and it was clear that his days are numbered. When Rachel came to visit me in the labor camp to tell me that my father had died, I replied: “I know, I dreamed at night”.

Jews being humiliated in the Square of Liberty, July 1942

After a month I returned home. Some who couldn’t handle it, didn’t return, they reached severe exhaustion from the hard work. I was strong, I did not break. I had my money from the wheat I sold, I bought coal sacks and together with some friends we sold coal to the rich. I had to find a way to make a living, to hold on. We didn’t know what a day will bring, we didn’t know the worst is still ahead of us.

At the end of 1942, I went to Rachel’s father, and told him I wanted to marry her. Who knew what will happen tomorrow? We wanted to be together. Many young Jewish couples married in those days, there were rumors that married men will receive a house and a job. The rabbi blessed us in the synagogue, the joy was restrained somewhat, but I was happy. My parents unfortunately were not with me at my wedding day, but my brothers and sisters were there, and my aunts and uncles came to rejoice with us, sang and danced in our honor. This was our last ‘Simcha’ (celebration).

11.

Not many days passed, and the wedding joy was replaced by concern and anxiety. In December 1942, the Germans had replaced the Jewish leadership in Thessaloniki, they appointed Dr. Zvi Kurtz as the community rabbi. We were not very involved in community life, we were not Elite and all the changes and rumors seemed un-relevant, to our daily life, only in retrospect, we understood how much the Germans were sophisticated, and prepared the ‘final solution’ step by step…

Two months later, in February, 1943, the Germans announced orders – through the Jewish community – that demonstrated to us Jews, how much we are subjected to the Germans’ arbitrariness, and to their Greek henchmen – some of them were once friends and neighbors. The orders were binding for every Jew from the age of 5 and up. We needed to wear the ‘Yellow patch’, which had a number on it, on the heart side on upper clothes, it was given to us by the community and all Jews were instructed to move to live in one of the ghettos that were prepared for us. One of these ghettos was established in ‘Baron Hirsh’ neighborhood, near the train station, an ideal place for the Germans’ plans. A few days after that, another directive was published which forbid Jews from changing their place of residence, without permission, whoever did that was subject to the death penalty. Also, the decree stated that Jews, cannot longer use public transport, are no longer allowed to enter some parts of the city or go through any important and central streets, Jews were bound from sitting in coffee shops or entering any clubs and were placed under curfew from sunset to morning hours.

We lived in a neighborhood in center-city. In our building resided both Jews and Greeks, so there was no choice, but to leave the building (due to these new rules). We didn’t know what to take with us since the rumors were that Jews, will be moved to the Krakow area in Poland, there an autonomy for Jews will be established, said the rumors. The other rumors about the destiny of Polish Jews, were rejected by most people as fake rumors, just some fabricated stories, that were meant to draw panic and fear among the people.

We were allowed to take luggage in the weight of 10 kg. Per person. I deliberated with my wife and brother, what should we take. Should we take warm clothes which fit the Winter in Poland, or take commodities that we can exchange for Trade purposes. I already replaced (traded) housewares and other garments from home that we could not take with us, for bread, Tabac, money and gold and we packed all we could. Sone of the neighbors came to bid us, goodbye, we gave them some things we could not carry with us, they of course promised they will return everything when we return from Poland. They knew we will not return. The Germans fraud was even bigger: There were people with gold, the Germans told them to go to the synagogue, deposit their gold there and receive a note for it, with this ‘note’, they were told: ‘You will get back your gold when you arrive in Poland’.

We arrived to the ‘Baron Hirsh’ ghetto. The ghetto was closed with wooden walls and barbed wire fences, and there were three gates: one gate for entering, one gate for leaving the ghetto and one gate at the direction of the train station. German soldiers patrolled around the ghetto and inside Jewish guys kept the order, anyone who tried to escape, was shot to death. It was crowded, inside our new place, we were 30 in that small apartment. It was forbidden to wander the streets. Once a day, at noon, a wagon arrived, carrying soup pots and people were given a portion. The conditions were harsh and unbearable (We were unaware that soon after we will have to deal with even more extreme conditions), the tension and nerves were hard, I felt like a lion in a cage.

After two weeks of being in the ghetto, we were told to be prepared for a voyage, to take very little clothing and very little food. We left the house. The streets were full of Germans with their dogs. They kept rushing us: “Quickly! Quickly!” They directed us to the gate which faced the train station. A big crowd of people stood in-front of the gate. We stood with them, my wife and I, my wife’s sister, my brother with his wife and daughter, my older sister and more friends of mine with their families.

We were on the fourth transport which left ghetto ‘Baron Hirsh’. The deception of the Germans worked very well. We truly believed any place

else would be better that this ghetto, we believed that we would reach Poland, we will get organized and we will be ok.

A train was waiting on the tracks – it was an engine-car and a line of train- cars attached, the kind which usually is used to transport animals. Shouting and pushing us, they loaded us on these train-cars, squeezing about eighty people in a train-car. The crowdedness was awful. There was no room to sit, no room to put down our belongings, terrible crowdedness, pushing, suffocation, shouting. When the train-car filled up, the Germans locked it with bars, only two small barred hatches remained our opening to the outside world. One more minute and the train started moving.

This terrible ride lasted Eight days in terrible conditions. The heat was awful, the stink as unbearable, at the corner of the train-car there was a bucket for defecation, it was horrible. Terrible humiliation, the conditions were inhumane. Babies cried, sick and old people moaned, it was impossible to move without stepping on someone, people quarreled from the crowdedness, from the hunger and thirst, from not having almost no air in the train-car. Once or twice the train stopped during the night, in a remote station in order to insert some water into the carts. We waited eagerly for this nightmare to end and to arrive in Poland already.

12.

On March, 25th, at night, the train stopped and the train-cars opened. Blinding light coming out from big spotlights, had blinded us in the first moment. When we got used to the light, we saw a lighted open field, looking like day light. Surrounding the train-cars were armed German officers and soldiers, some accompanied by threatening dogs, some holding clubs in their hands. Shouting at us they yelled: “Raus! Raus!” Pushing us to get out of the train-cars, to leave our luggage in one place and to get organize: Men separately than Women. A little farther, stood the trucks.

Among those German soldiers, there were characters that seem to me, at that point, very strange. They reminded me, of the prisoners’ figures in

movies, people who were dressed in striped clothes who moved quietly, like ghosts, towards our train-cars.

When we got out of the train-car, I too, like everyone else wondered where are we, so I tried asking these striped clothed men, in every language I knew: in ‘Spaniolit’, in Greek, in French, in Hebrew. I asked: “What is this place? Where have we arrived to?” But they kept silent. Only one of them, a Polish, that on his clothes there was this red triangle, took a carton and wrote the number ‘3000’, made a sound of a moving train or ‘ho-ho chick chack, chack chack’ pointed with his hands towards the sky, wrote the number ‘400’ and pointed with his hand down – meaning, staying here. That seemed very strange to me, I didn’t understand exactly what he meant.

We arrived at Birkenau.

Later, everything became clear. I then understood the silence of these people. I understood why this man dared. He was a Polish pilot, a political prisoner, a Christian. There were many types of prisoners in Birkenau. It was possible to distinguish between them by the triangle on their clothing: a Black triangle – Sabotage, Red triangle – political prisoner, pink triangle – homosexuals. We had a star of David – both yellow and red meaning both Jews and political prisoners. But all that I learned later.

Meanwhile, they told us to concentrate in four groups: one of older men who are incompetent for work, another group of younger men, a group of older women and mothers with children, and the fourth the rest of the women. People moved from group to group, not knowing exactly where they should stand. We were still confused, didn’t understand what is going on here. Panic, confusion, total chaos. Babies crying, children crying while departing from their fathers, crying voices of women and men who were forced to separate, voices of people looking for family and friends, and above all that, the German soldiers shouting. The Germans shouted that the women with children, will ride on the trucks while the others will walk. Everyone was sure that they will meet in a certain place. This again, was a German deceit – they kind of anesthetized us. My brother’s wife, climbed onto the truck with their daughter. We never saw those who were

driven by the trucks, again. They were taken straight to the gas and the crematorium.

The Germans ordered us to walk. I said goodbye to my wife, told her not to worry, I will take care of her. I was very sure we shall meet again. The order to start walking was given and both groups started walking, each one to a different direction. It was raining lightly; the rain drops came down on my face and refreshed me. After eight days of being inside the train-car, crowded, among so many people, I said to myself that there is no reason to hurry, I will walk slowly, refresh a bit. It was like someone whispered to me: ‘Eliezer, don’t rush. If you are lucky, you will shut your eyes and die’…

The line of people was long, the German soldiers who accompanied us, encouraged us by shouting, to walk quickly. We jumped over the train tracks and left the train station area, we passed buildings and sheds and arrived at a gate which had a sign above it with big letters in iron: ‘ARBEIT MACHT FREI’ – ‘work liberates’.

We walked through this gate, electric gates around and after a few minutes we arrived into a wide shed. We were ordered to stop. Then we were ordered to enter into the shed, take our clothes off, put our clothes in a pile aside and give them any valuable possession we have – money, watches, rings – anything we had. People obeyed, as if there was any other option? everyone gave what they had on them. We were ordered to shower, there was no towel to wipe ourselves, they through some clothes to us, cut all our hair on our bodies, sprayed us with disinfectant liquid, and a German soldier ordered us to stand in line and stretch out our left hand. With a needle, they engraved on our left forearm a number. My number was: 112608. From there they marched us to the block. We didn’t yet understand what is going on, but our heart predicted bad news.

We arrived to block number 27; a long shed. At the entrance there was a small booth where the ‘blocktaste’ – the ‘block elder’, the ‘mother’ of the block, resided. Alongside the block there were narrow boards to sleep on. Some antisemitic Spanish men were there and they said to us: “Aqui es la casa de la Muerte” – this is the house of death.

Although I was very tired, I did not fall asleep. So many thoughts ran through my head and bothered me. I tried to understand to what place did we arrive and how can I prepare for what is yet to come. I thought to myself that we need to learn and see and how can we get organized. At the early morning hours, while it was still dark out, we were ordered to get out and arrange in rows of five, for counting. We stood for several hours until counting was over, then they gave us a kind of a turbid drink which was supposed to be coffee and someone came and said that they are looking for guys to work. I was not scared. I had energy, I was strong. They took us to the kitchen to unload a truck which brought potatoes. Within half an hour, we finished that and the people in charge saw that we are strong and they told us to come again tomorrow. This is how I started working carrying in the kitchen. The advantage was that we had food. I could give food to my brother who was weak and could not manage.

It wasn’t easy to manage in Birkenau. We spoke a different language than the rest, we looked different. People asked what language we are speaking, But I managed. I arranged food for all the family. One day I saw

near the women camp fence, an acquaintance of ours from Thessaloniki. I wanted her to tell me where my wife was but suddenly an S.S. Person came and started shouting at me, how dare am I to speak to a women prisoner, he wrote my number but the digit 6 was not so clear and he wrote 0 instead of 6 so they couldn’t find me. Who knows what my fate would have been if they found me, they might have shot me or send me to the crematorium, but I was lucky. That was one of many times that I got lucky and I was saved from death or a severe punishment. I did manage to locate my wife and I sent her food. I bribed people with bread, gave them and sent her as well. She wrote to me: “If I survive, I will know what kind of a man you are”.

Bread was an expensive necessity in Birkenau, you could buy almost anything with bread. People hid gold in their clothing. There was a lot of gold in Birkenau, but there was almost no one who was willing to buy the gold. I wasn’t afraid to take gold, I was brave. I made a connection with a Polish guy who worked in the ‘Bread kommando’. I gave him gold and receive bread from him.

Despite the fact that I worked in a good place – relatively to people who had to carry heavy stones from place to place with no reason or purpose, or those who worked in digging, or drying swamps and were squeezed out of all their energy in force labor – I was still looking for a way to get out of Birkenau. Everybody knew that Birkenau is an extermination camp, a death camp. People said that whoever leaves Birkenau is saved from death. At the end of a day’s work, which lasted usually over twelve hours, a lockdown and curfew was announced on the camp. We all had to be inside our sheds, on the crowded boards we each had to sleep on, a very limited living space, maybe 60 cm. wide, with no option to leave even to the bathroom.

13.

Two months after we arrived at Birkenau, I heard they are looking for professionals. They asked if anyone is a tinsmith (metal worker) I said: “I am a tinsmith”, they gathered us, most of us were from Thessaloniki, and

took us to Auschwitz, 3 km. from Birkenau. Before I left, I brought my friend, Baruch, to work instead of me in the kitchen and asked him to take care of my brother as much as he could.

In Auschwitz, they housed us in block number 3, and sent us immediately to widen a riverbed of Vistula River. Every morning, we walked by foot all the way to the river, accompanied by S.S. Soldiers of course, caring our tools on us. In the river, we stood wallowing in the mud and the mortar, working under their open eye of the S.S. and their fast hand to draw their hand-gun and shoot who ever seemed to them as being negligent, or just raise the whip and strike people, just like that, with no reason. So, we couldn’t rest, it was forbidden to stand, forbidden to talk, we had to work with no break, with no rest.

One of these days, we got back to camp in the evening, filthy and exhausted after another forced labor, day, and the guard stopped us all: “hands up!” he shouted. They checked us, feeling our bodies, our clothes, our hats. In my garment wing they found a small gold-ingot I hid. Bad luck! I could already see my death… to my fortune, a young boy from Thessaloniki, who knew German, stood at the gate as well – Jako Mano – I knew him from Thessaloniki, his brother worked with me. “What is this Eliezer”, he asked, “I don’t know, I found it”, I replied. He was a big ‘Mamzer’ (kind of a ‘wise guy’ who knows how to be a ‘smart aleck’), he probably had connections because he exchanged words whispering aside with the German and the German signaled with his hand that I could pass. Of course he did take the gold-ingot for himself.

I noticed this young kid has connections and I asked him to take care of me so I will get a job in some good ‘kommando’. (The Sonderkommandos were groups of Jewish prisoners forced to perform a variety of duties in the Auschwitz- Birkenau).

After a few days, they called me and sent me to the ‘kommando’ who worked in the quarry of the cement factory, ‘Golschau’, far about 80 km. From Auschwitz, close to the Poland-Czechia border.

14.

In the Golschau quarry, we worked in six hours shifts. Every three prisoners had to fill-up 4 train-cars of material from the quarry. A very hard work physically, very little food. If one wouldn’t arrange something, he would be lost. Every week they lead a selection to check who is still qualified for work and who – is not. Those who were exhausted from the forced labor, hunger and the constant abuse – were sent to Auschwitz to be suffocated in the gas chambers and then burned in the crematorium.

To my fortune, I got along with everybody. I joined some Jewish Polish guys who were there longer and worked in the kitchen. I spoke Hebrew to them, the little I remembered from my father and from school. They knew Hebrew as well, from the ‘Haider’. They said to me: “Come into the kitchen, we will turn our heads, we will turn a blind eye, put your tin bowl inside the big soup pot and take soup”. Food meant life. If you didn’t eat, you had no strength to work. People who didn’t know how to organize things for themselves, got non-potable water, with some cabbage leaves floating up, instead of soup. These people remained hungry. So, I sneaked into the kitchen, looked around me, saw there is no one around, placed my tin-bowl quickly into the big soup pot, filled it up with a lot of substance, and escaped fast, to eat my soup with exuberance. But… I left a ‘soup drops trail’ behind me… The kitchen supervisor, who was not aware of my ‘arrangement’ with the Polacks, followed the trail I left and found my bowl. The next day I ‘wised-up’, filled one tin-bowl with soup but placed another tin-bowl underneath it, so there will be no dripping on the floor. He didn’t manage to find me and I ate the soup which had substance, with Potatoes, with Cabbage, with Turnip, hot soup, tasty and filling. I decided to take revenge at the kitchen supervisor. So, one day, I sneaked into the kitchen very quietly so he won’t notice me, I hid and waited for the right moment. He turned around to lid the coal stove and was standing with his back to me, that was the moment I waited for. I jumped quickly and grabbed a bread loaf of 2 kg. And ran. Unfortunately, some Hungarian prisoners saw me and tried to grab the bread from my hands. Everyone was starving. The food and the food chase, drove everyone crazy. I did not give up my bread. I stabbed the Hungarians who attacked me with my

spoons but they wouldn’t give up. Legs, hands, kicking, stabbing, shouting. People could kill each other for bread. Anyone who did not feel hunger in his life, cannot understand that, cannot understand what hunger can cause human beings. Suddenly, an S.S. man arrived, the pile of men on top of me, stood up. He understood what the fuss was all about. To my fortune, he decided to punish me with wiping and didn’t shoot me. It is all a matter of luck. He judged me to 25 lashing because I stole bread. I took my shirt off, bent over and he started hitting me with his whip. I heard the whip whistle, heard the beating, he counted: “one… two…”. I was strong. I didn’t yell. The whip ripped my back skin. “Twenty-three… twenty- four… twenty-five…”. Still, not a word came out of my mouth. The S.S. got upset that I am quiet: “What is this, a Jew that gets whipped and is silent? another twenty-five lashes!”. I bit my lips and remained silent. My back was bleeding, looked like an ‘meat dough’, but I was happy they didn’t give me the death penalty. My ‘Kapo’ (Kapos were Jewish inmates who were forced by the Nazis, to serve as ‘stand-in guards’, against their fellow Jewish prisoners, in the camps). So, my ‘Kapo’, was a Polish ‘Mamzer’ (in slang: a shrewd type). He liked me and he said to me: “They will kill you here if you behave this way”. “I have to eat” I said to him, “If I don’t fill-up a train-car, you will kill me”. They needed us as a work force, we were their slaves. I was the only Greek there. After I got the beating, the kitchen supervisor came to me and said: “Eliezer, don’t steel anymore, I will send you your portion”, and so he did.

Hunger bothered constantly. I, and like me all the others, were busy all the time with thoughts and actions about getting food and satisfying our annoying hunger, even if we had to take risks of heavy punishments. We use to take an aluminum pot filled with potatoes and cook them inside the

S.S. stove…

One day we were caught. The S.S. man came and saw the potatoes being cooked, he called the ‘Kapo’ and asked him: “Was ist das?” (What is this?), the reply was: “This is from the Greek”. The S.S. officer called me: “Grek, Komm her!” (Come here!) “Go bring some wood pieces from around here!” It was obvious that if I left, he would shoot me. He would say I tried to escape and shoot. The Polack ‘Kapo’ raised his hand and

slapped me hard and shouted: “Geh zur Arbeit! (Go to work!) then he said to the S.S. “How will we fill the train-car if you kill him? You want cement, you need the people alive not dead”. Again, I was lucky, again I was saved from death.

Every morning, we used to leave camp to the quarry for another day of forced labor. Lines of people who only wanted to survive another day, to stay alive. In the morning, when we left for work, we were handed work- tools: pick-axes, shovels, hammers, hoes, we had to carry these with us all the way to the quarry, and in the evening, we had to carry them again all the way back to the storage-shed. In the evening when we returned from work, we were given a beet soup, something they give to animals to eat, and they gave us a piece of bread. From morning to evening, we were not given any food. People weakened from hunger and hard labor. On our way we passed agricultural plots where they grew all kinds of vegetables. One of these days, I saw a cabbage just lying on the ground, I couldn’t resist and I left the line, jumped, took the cabbage and hid it inside my coat. Few more people did that, some took cabbage, some took kohlrabi; we didn’t even make it back in line, and an S.S. man was standing there, near us. Many through the vegetables they took, not me – I didn’t. He hit me with his rifle haft, the cabbage under my coat made crashing noises: crick… crick… the S.S. Soldier kept beating me but I didn’t throw the cabbage. The Polish Kapo turned to me and said: “They will kill you”. I said: “How will I fill up the train-car if I have no strength?” He understood the logic of what I said and spoke to the German. The next day, when I stood with the group, raising my pick-axe, picking heavy stones with my hands and filling the train-car, the S.S. man called me: “Grek, Komm her!”. I didn’t know what to expect, we were subject to the arbitrariness of the Germans, they could do, whatever they wanted to us – I went over to him. To my big surprise, the man opened his bag, took out two slices of bread and handed them out to me.

I am a big optimist.

There were times I wanted to rest a little from the hard work, but only people the doctor confirmed are not fit for work, were allowed to stay in camp. So, I covered my hand with the blanket, hit it with the hammer we

used at the quarry, wait for it to get swollen, go to the doctor, and he authorized a few days of rest, this way I could accumulate some energy, and get back to work. In the days I didn’t work in the quarry, the Germans would take me to their supply camp, to load vegetables into crates, and bring them into our camp.

One of these days, I entered the kitchen and saw some prisoners who were probably unexperienced, standing and eating vegetables: Kohlrabi, Carrots, Cabbage, Beet, I said to them: “What are you doing? It is not allowed to eat here, the ‘Cholera’ (disease meaning in slang: the terrible) Germans, will force us to open our mouths, and will check if there are food signs in our mouths when we return, and if they find any – they will punish us”. That is what happened. When we came back, the guard in the gate ordered each one of us to open his mouth and the people who had signs of food in their mouth – were punished. He ordered me also, to open my mouth – nothing, so he gave the sign that I am ok and could pass. The ‘blockeltasta’ shook his head in disbelieve: “This one? This one is the smartest thief of all” but I was lucky, not everyone got lucky. Not everyone held-on in these inhumane conditions we were at. Some people lost their minds, some lost their humanity, some tried to escape, most of them with no luck. One of the prisoners who tried to get away, was caught and sentenced to death by hanging, but the damned Germans decided to abuse him. They imprisoned him inside a dark bunker, with no food or drink, after a few days, in the course of ‘Yom-Kippur’, they took him out of the bunker. They forced us all to stand in the yard and watch him being executed. The poor man stood there, blind because of the strong sun light blinding him after he was in a dark bunker, he swayed dizzy from hunger, from thirst and from organ swiftness and the Germans dragged him to the hanging column. The S.S. officer who was in charge of the camp, tied the hanging rope around the man’s neck and enjoyed hanging him especially on ‘Yom-Kippur’, but, ‘Yesh Din Veyesh Dayan’ (It’s a Hebrew saying, meaning: ‘There is law and there is a judge’. Eliezer meant: This S.S. will get his punishment). This German, who after the war went back to Germany to create a regular citizen life for himself, was found by the state of Israel and brought to justice.

The Emissaries of the state of Israel, didn’t rest. They didn’t give up and looked for the S.S. Officers to bring them to justice for all the crimes they committed. They found him as well. In the year 1979, I was called to the police station in Yehuda Halevi St. They showed me a picture of him, I recognized the evil Nazi. I was requested to travel to Germany to testify in his trial. Edit didn’t want to come with me. I left for Germany, testified in the trial and spoke of that hanging. I don’t know what punishment he received but I got the satisfaction that he didn’t escape one.

15.

At the end of 1944, rumors disseminated word to mouth in Golschau, that the Allies’ armed forces, have inflicted defeat on the German army. We saw how the S.S. officers are becoming more and more restless and jumpy. Again, the fortune goddess stood on my shoulder. The story was that in order to get another piece of bread, I volunteered to bring a ‘Kesele’ – which was a samovar with a capacity of 50 liters, from the camp to ‘Steinbruch’ – the stone quarry we worked at. A samovar with Tea, which I carried on my back. One of these times, at the end of December 1944, I arrived to the quarry with the heavy samovar and an S.S. man stretched his leg out of a sadistic play, just kicked me and tripped me. I fell and broke one of my hand fingers. The paramedic was a Jewish doctor named, Einstein, he gave me a permission to rest a few days. Christmas arrived and the S.S. men had a big party and we watched them. We might have even clapped our hands at the end of the show. That is when the same S.S. guy who hit me back then, because of the bread I stole, said: “I wish for you all, that next year you will be in your homes”. He knew what he was talking about…

In the meantime, I didn’t go to work due to the sick days I was given, so, I started arranging clothes for myself, and food and shoes, for any case.

In January 1945, the Russian attack started, the work in the stone quarry has stopped and then came the order that we need to leave camp. They assembled us in the center of camp and S.S. men surrounded us. They gave us portions of food, opened the storage-room and gave us blankets

and parts of worn-out clothing and we started walking. Snow was pouring down on us, the soil was frozen, and the freezing cold infiltrated our bones. Two days we were dragged in the snow, hungry and freezing. I had good clothes and shoes, others came really miserable, with nothing. The weak among us started to drop out from the ‘convoy’ and we heard voices of shooting behind us. The Germans shot the falling. We could not help, anyone who stopped, was shot. At nights we saw tongues of the huge fires and heard the voices of the artillery, the guards rushed us beating us to proceed. We were guarded strictly. We were hungry and thirsty, we took some snow in our hands and tried to quench our thirst. Our legs submerged, inside the snow, we were being led, without knowing where to.

A few days later we arrived to a small town, where we were told to get up onto some open train-cars, of a freight train. Up there, they gave us, in each train-car, some loaves of bread, margarine and some Sugar. It was chaos there, a big commotion, ‘Balagan’. We utilized the chaos and I with a few friends, collected bread, margarine and sugar, covered ourselves with a blanket so no one sees us and try to take what we have, and ate like this under the blanket and this way we departed again, to an unknown destination. The cold was stabbing. It was January. Freezing. Even the kind of ‘good’ clothing I had did not protect me, nor the blankets, nothing helped from the steady freezing cold. It was snowing constantly, without a break, and covered everyone in white, people died in those open train- cars from the cold, from hunger or from exhaustion. Some jumped out of these train-cars from despair. It is fait and a little luck is involved as well.

Two days of this journey into Germany and we arrived at Oranienburg, near Berlin. It was actually a suburb of Berlin, and we stopped at Heinkel factories – a production plant for building airplanes parts. The Germans didn’t know what to do with us so they housed us in the airplanes’ hangars, until they decide, what our will be our fate. At nights, we heard alarms, when that happened, they told us to get out and ordered us to lie down on the snow. The S.S. men, the guards, looked very frightened. We stayed at the same place until the next morning. After the night freeze we were so happy with the sunrise, hoping it will warm our freezing bodies. From

fragments of conversations between the guards, we knew they are concerned, that the Russians already conquered Poland and Hungary and even entered Germany already.

We hoped that the day of our release is not far. In the meantime, I still needed to survive.

We were in Heinkel, a few days and then they transferred us to Sachsenhausen camp, close to Heinkel factory, about twenty-five Km. north east to Berlin. Here too, just like in Auschwitz, the inscription: ‘ARBEIT MACHT FREI’ – ‘work liberates’, welcomed us. Sachsenhausen was a center of training for S.S. officers who were designated for different positions in concentration camps. The camp was built from sixty blocks (sheds) arranged in half a circle, like a moon, when their entrances turning towards the big formation yard. A guard post was placed at the top of the building structure, at the entrance of the camp, and it controlled all the yard and the blocks entrances. They had several spotlights and a machine-gun on this post.

In this camp there were prisoners of war from Russia, Norway, and Swedish as well, they were entitled to receive packages from home. With desperate eyes, I watched them open their packages which had white bread, sausages, cheeses… things I could only dream of. We placed salt inside warm water in a pot that had just a little soup’ leftovers in it, and that is what we sipped. The most important thing was to eat, to eat…

Like in Golschau, here too, people were taken to work. Here too people were divided by ‘Kommando’ – work groups. We were taken to dig defensive trenches to protect from the bombing. Some prisoners were taken to work in Heinkel factory for airplanes or in AEG. There was even a ‘dog kommando’ – people who took care of the dogs, these dogs were hitched to the wagons. One of these ‘kommando’ prisoners, was a French guy who knew how to talk with the most aggressive dog there, and calm him down. There was not one dog, who did not submit to him.

One day, this French guy, called me to join him to the ‘Hondekuche’ – the dog kitchen. It wasn’t really a kitchen, it was a ‘supermarket’ filled with many goods: stripes of meat which were dried out and grinned with the

bones, for the dogs. There were also crackers and other types of foods which we didn’t see nor dreamed of receiving – a real treasure. We opened our coats and started stuffing it with crackers, dog food, anything was ok to ease our hunger which never stopped annoying. Suddenly, I noticed Germans approaching. For one moment, I hesitated: to go out – bad, to stay in – even worse. I sneaked out quietly without the S.S. noticing me, but they did catch the French guy, they set the dogs on him and they ripped him apart.

The air bombing got more frequent and I could see the airplanes above us. We heard terrible noise of airplanes and awful frightening bombings which caused a big train to fall of its tracks. The Russian airplanes through flyers from the air which read: ‘on May 2nd, – in Berlin’.

Everything seemed so close and yet, we kept working and digging.

One day, they took us to a scrap yard where we were had to separate aluminum from iron. We sat inside of a block (shed) and suddenly we heard an alarm. We lay down. Suddenly, a thought went through my mind that the place we are lying down in, is not safe. I said in Greek: “Guys, it is not safe here”. I opened a window, jumped outside and ran 50 meters where there was a ditch. I entered the ditch. Airplanes kept bombing for ten minutes. After the noise stopped, I left the ditch and saw that the block (shed) we were in, was destroyed completely, anyone who was in it or close to it was hurt by the bombing. I saw around bodies without heads, without legs, without hands, mutilated corps of dogs, bombs which didn’t explode, total devastation. The S.S. men were also scattered around and not seen anywhere. We ran to look for the S.S. kitchen, everyone ran to find the S.S. kitchen. “Where is the S.S. kitchen?”, “Weiter, Weiter” came the answer, meaning: “farther, farther, down”. On the way to that kitchen, I saw guys who came back already from the kitchen, their hands filled with food products, some found pieces of burned meat, some found loaves of bread, we got there too late. Everything was emptied, only a few bottles of wine were left, I took them, ‘I will find a way to replace them’, I thought to myself.

The Germans started to recuperate. They gathered us and lead us outside of camp. This time, these were not S.S. officers, the Germans recruited the older prisoners to lead us. Along the way there were corpses of horses who died in the bombing. Some people took some of their flesh to eat. I was careful, I was afraid that people will cut my hand if I place my hand there, so many people just pounced on the dead horses. Close to the river, I saw one Greek eating a green vegetation that looked like the vegetable, leek, but then he died. It was poisoned. I didn’t want to finish my life now that the release moment seemed so close.

Like other times, this time I was also lucky. A few days before this heavy bombing, I was working with an axe to chop wood for the digging, the axe hurt my leg. The bad nutrition and the un-hygienic conditions made the wound to produce pus. The medic placed a compress on it and in some miracle way, the wound was cured. If the wound would not have gotten well, I could not have been walking. In this walk, many died and fell of exhaustion, from disease, from hunger. This walk was later known as a: ‘Death March’. We walked a few days. At nights they would close us in some stable or cowshed or some abandoned build-structure, and in the morning, we kept walking.

On May 2nd., 1945, we arrived at Schwerin. Suddenly all the Germans disappeared. In Schwerin, Russian soldiers met us and said to us: “guys, you are free”. Freedom? It was hard to get excited, to absorb the thought that we are free. There were still fights going on, there were still airplanes we could hear, I hid under a tree and said to myself: ‘Now you need to really keep safe, to not ‘leave life’ now’.

In Schwerin, we found a kitchen full with goods, jugs full of milk, sacks of rice, shelves and cabins full of German food. They left everything and ran for their lives. We took as much as we could, we ate more than we could digest. We just ate to eat, not just to be full. I decided to stay in Schwerin for the time being, I had no plans for the future. I was with two more young guys and we build ourselves a small hut near the lake. We used to swim in the lake, we tried to get used to free life, to life without any threat from Germans, to life without beating, abuse, but still, our survival instinct remained awake and sharp.

One time, I found two potatoes, I lid a fire and cooked those potatoes, I bent down to turn them over and I saw, through the corner of my eye, a pair of legs approaching. I sat quietly not showing that I noticed the man arriving. When he was very close, I caught his leg and knocked the intruder over. The Russian prisoners who were with us, wanted to steel the food. They stole whatever they found, they were very violent and aggressive, even between themselves, they were hard on each other.

The rumors were that the Americans are six Km. From Schwerin and that they are bringing huge amounts of food. The Russians destroyed and ruined any place they arrived at. They were looting and robbing anything they found out of hunger. I decided to start walking towards the Americans. On my way I heard some ‘yonge hitler’ (young Nazi) saying: “Weiter” – “farther than here are the English and American forces”. With some kind of revenge feeling and rejoicing in his failure, I said to him: “Deutschland, Deutschland, uber alles” (the German national anthem: Germany, Germany, above all) “Aber wann, English kommen – unter alles”. (Meaning: but when the English are coming – (Germany) under all.

On May 7th, Germany surrendered to the allies.

We arrived into the American zone. I remember seeing on our way, trees filled with fruit. What great feeling that was to pick the fruit from the tree, and eat it, feeling its juice filling the mouth. The Americans received us with sympathy, offered us clothing and food. We ate well, we wore their uniforms, they hanged their clothes and we took them. We ‘joined’ the American and English forces and moved with them. All Europe was on the move at that stage, people drove from place to place, soldiers, citizens, and especially, refugees. The Americans built displaced-persons’ camps for refugees in Germany, one of them was in a formerly, armor camp, close to the concentration camp: Bergen-Belsen. We entered that camp, for the first time in so long, I slept in a bed with linen, I ate until I was full, I received clean clothes (what I wasn’t given – I took), and I walked around the camp as a free man.

Everyone was looking for relatives, family, friends, everyone was walking around with lists and hope that they will find someone from their past. In August 1945, we heard the Americans bombed Hiroshima in Japan, with an atom bomb. The war was over. The world opened for us. Ads were hanged on the bulletin board, ads looking for family members or acquaintances among survivors. I read my cousin, the son of my father’s brother from America is looking for survivors from our family. I wrote to him, but eventually I decided together with some friends from Thessaloniki, that I want to go back to Greece. We got on a plane and returned to Greece, two years after we were taken from there. I returned home after two and a half years of hell.

16.

It was a mistake to go back.

We landed at a small military airport, in the outskirts of Athens. The Greek received us with a shameful welcome. They hardly looked at us, if some did look at us, it was with loathing and rejection. They gave us identity cards and brought us to a built-structure which used to be a school, a dirty place, half ruined, with no water, that is where they assembled all the Jews and survivors. The Greek thieves were already around. They thought we arrived with goods and wanted to steel it from us. I noticed them walking around the building, I stood at the dark corner and lid a cigarette. The thieves saw that and ran away.

The insult I felt due to the Greek attitude, was so big, that I couldn’t put food in my mouth. Eight days I didn’t eat, I was angry at myself for coming here, ‘how did I return to Greece? What am I looking for in Greece with these antisemitic Greeks?’ I hated them and I hated the place.

After the war Greece, was weak and unstable. With Germans retreat, fights broke out between different guerrilla forces who fought the Germans during the occupation: On one hand – ‘The Liberation army’ which was controlled by the communists and supported by the Russians, and on the other hand – ‘The National Democratic army’ which supported

the monarchy, and was supported by the Americans. Antisemitism was spreading in both armies, and we suffered insults and cursing from both sides. Due to the fights between communists to monarchists, Greece was unable to recuperate from the war. There was shortage in everything, the Greeks who were worried that Jews who came back, will demand their property that Greeks took over, treated the people who returned, with hostility.

After eight days in Athens, I decided I had enough and went to Thessaloniki. I walked in the street, a carton suitcase in my hand, and the city seemed both foreign and familiar at once. The White tower stood in its place, observing the city. The streets are the same streets but the familiar faces and voices, have disappeared. I looked for my family members, I looked for friends, relatives, acquaintances, but I could not find anyone. In my family home, I saw strangers sitting, I asked about my brother in the community-house, about my sister-in-law, about my sister, about my wife, buy slowly, slowly, it became clear, that no one returned.

I had no place to put down my head, I looked for any of my officer friends from my army days, and found Carinidis Yanus. He looked happy to see me, I told him, I need a place to stay for a few days to recuperate, he opened his house and heart to me. He too, was poor and miserable, but the little he had, he shared with me. The first advise he gave me was to change my age to an older age, “They are recruiting everyone to the army”, he said. I couldn’t even think about serving in the Greek army again. I raised my age and wrote that I was thirty years old, because the maximum age to enlist to the army, was Twenty- eight. I couldn’t keep taking advantage of my friend’s good will, I had to decide where I am going.

I felt I was on a crossroad.

17.

One of those days, I met David, Isak and Baruch, on the street. My childhood friends who also came back from the hell of concentration camps. After our big joy of meeting each other, they told me that near

Athens there is a ‘Hachshara’ (training) preparing Jews for making Aliya to ‘Erets Israel’. We decided we have nothing more to do in Greece, and we will therefore, join the ‘Hachshara’. We took the boat to Athens together and arrived in the place where the ‘Hachshara’ assembled in ‘Ktima Tsakona’ (an abandoned farm outside of Athens). I saw a villa which looked like paradise to me, surrounded by tents. We went to the management of the ‘Hachshara’ and told them we would like to join them. We were accepted happily and we entered the ‘Hachshara’.

The ‘Hachshara’ camp, was under a disguise of a summer camp. There were Israeli soldiers there, who served in the Jewish Brigade, and they trained us in preparation for the un-legal Aliya to ‘Eretz Israel’ and towards life in the country. We practiced swimming and rowing, they taught us basics in agriculture: to plow, to sow, they gave us lectures on life in ‘Eretz Israel’, and we still had time left to enjoy and have some fun. We remained alone, no brothers or sisters, no family, free like butterflies. We wanted to swallow as much as we could from this freedom, to fill the absence, to compensate ourselves on everything that was stolen from us.

In Greece after the war there was a big lack of consumer goods, from basis foods and up to what looked like luxuries: cigarettes, nylon stockings and so forth. The American and English soldiers, had these in abundance – we used to take those from them and sell it for good prices to the Greeks. With the money we earned, we went out to have a good time. We went to the movies, we drove to Athens to hear music and dance, we all wanted to forget the horrors of war and seize the day.

Eleven months we were at ‘Hachshara’. One of these days, one of the Israeli’ emissaries approached us and said: “Guys, there is no wood for cooking”. No one moved, but my conscience bothered me, I saw what this guy is doing for us so I volunteered together with a few more guys, to climb the mountain and bring wood. Since I had money, I bought also a lamb to grill it on the fire, and so we made our way back to the ‘Hachshara’ camp, with the wood and the lamb.

When we arrived at camp, we saw an unusual commotion. “Hurry up” they said to us, “We are sailing tonight, everyone needs to be ready until

9pm.” I let the lamb go, packed my few belongings, put on my American uniform, and I was ready to leave. We all stood outside waiting for the sign. At 9 pm., we started walking, a long line of people, some with a suitcase, some with backpacks, caring with us the very little we had on this earth, we left our past lives behind and we felt we are walking towards a new future. The road from our ‘Hachshara’ camp, to ‘Sounio beach’, took about fifteen minutes. A boat which was about to take us to ‘Eretz Israel’, was waiting there for us.

18.

Two boats waited for us. A little one named ‘Rafi’ – named after the Israeli military paratrooper, Rafael Reiss who was murdered by the Nazis in Czechoslovakia at the end of 1944. The second boat – somewhat bigger – ‘Haviva Reich’ named after the military paratrooper women, who came from the ‘Palmach’ (a Jewish military force in ‘Eretz Israel’ before independence). She parachuted into Slovakia in September 1944 behind enemy German lines, was caught and immediately executed by the Nazis. The boat ‘Rafi’ has anchored about three meters from a big rock and next to her anchored ‘Haviva Reich’. In the dark we saw the shadow of a boat with a mast and a back sail. In the quiet we were in, only the sound of the waves caressing the ships, which were swinging on the water, was heard.

Between the big rock and the boat ‘Rafi’, a wooden bridge was installed. They divided us to groups of twenty people in each group, and one by one, we started crossing the bridge to the ‘Rafi’ boat and from it to the ‘Haviva Reich’ ship. We were welcomed by ‘Eretz Israeli’ guys, strong, with burned faces (from the sun), and by the Greek captain and Greek sailors. They directed us to go down under the deck, into a big storeroom, about 150 square meters big with hundreds of boards to sleep, one on top of the other. Each one of us, took its place on a board, placed his small bundle down and at the hour 11:30 pm. on the night of June 1946, the ships raised anchor and left the port. The sea was quiet, it was a summer night, millions of stars escorted us from above, on our way to a new life. Both ships sailed one after the other, no one interrupted us.

The ‘Maapilim’ ship ‘Haviva Reich’, 1946

A short time after we left Sounio Cape, when we were in front of Alonissos port, the ‘Rafi’ ship bumped into a small motorboat, but no real damage occurred, so she continued on her way. We sailed in the direction of Rhodes and in the island Sacrapento (known today as Karpathos), in a desolated and deserted shore, some guys waited for us and they brought food and water, on board. We stayed all night close to the shore on Karpathos Island. Our escorts explained, that the captain prefers to stay all night near a deserted shore, out of concern of military mines or running aground (Shoal). In the meantime, we settled inside the ship. We established some committees for different issues. Each group was responsible for distributing food and drink during the sailing days. They kept reminding us what we are expected to do and how to avoid being caught by the British (The British had a UN mandate on ‘Eretz Israel’ until 1948). They especially emphasized, not to wander around, on the deck.

At crack of dawn, the ships raised their anchors and sailed into the open sea, leaving a white trail behind them. After three days, the ships stopped and the ‘Rafi’ ship passengers, came on board to our ship. The Greek staff went back with the ‘Rafi’ ship to the Greek home port and the ‘Eretz Israeli’ guys, handled our ship ‘Haviva Reich’ and sailed it from that moment on. We were about five hundred From Greece on the ship. The weather was nice, the sea was quiet and on the ship itself, the environment was of happiness and cheerfulness, even pride for being the ‘Maapilim’ from Greece! (‘Maapilim’ was the name given to the illegal Jewish immigrants, who arrived through the sea, before Israel’s independence).

Being on the ‘Haviva Reich’ ship, we felt we left a heavy cargo behind us and here we come to the new country, filled with hope.

After five days of sailing, when we were about a hundred Km. from the shore, on June 7th, at morning hours, an airplane arrived, flying low above us. Everyone was immediately ordered to go under deck, and those who remained on deck, were told to hide under the lifeboat’s tarpaulin. The airplane circled above three times and then left. Close to noon, a British battleship came near and started escorting our ship. The British took down a boat and a few sailors shot at the ‘Haviva Reich’, a few bursts. Then, they returned to their battleship.

Our ship commander – Arie (Kipi) Kaplan, decided to stage an engine malfunction and stop the boat. On one hand, we were very tense, that a confrontation with the British might happen, but on the other hand, we were determined, not to let the British prevent us from reaching ‘Eretz Israel’. The battleship turned and moved away from us. In the afternoon, our ship commander decided to get away from the shore, to escape the British, and return the next day with dawn, and try to reach the shores of Tel-Aviv or Nizanim, as planned. In the evening, after the sun has set at the sea, the British battleship returned. We threw tied barrels into the sea in order to disrupt the Radar reception. All the lights on the ship were extinguished and in darkness, we sailed in the opposite direction. Towards midnight, the British battleship, rammed the sides of our ship. We felt a strong shaking. The British came on board and tried to start its engines but

did not succeed. After two hours, the British soldiers, tied our ship to their battleship, and dragged the ‘Haviva Reich’ to Haifa port.

19.

On June 8th, 1946, I arrived to ‘Eretz Israel’.

Under the British soldiers open eye, we came down the ramp of the ship into the busses that waited for us, and took us to the detention camp in Atlit. The ‘Hagana’ men (Hagana was pre IDF) who were with us, changed their cloths and pretended to be ‘Maapilim’, and while they pretended to be loading the bags on the bus, they sat in-front of the wheel, and left the harbor.

We arrived at Atlit. Barbed wire fences and British armored cars, surrounded the camp. For a moment, a different camp memory from not long ago, came up, but that moment passed. The English tried to interrogate us, to find out who were the organizers. They concluded that this was a private sailing, with no connection to the ‘Hagana’ men, or to the ‘Mosad LeAliya Bet’ (Pre Mosad organization) men, and they could not get any information out of us. They divided us into the sheds for the night, long sheds, and in each one, two rows of iron beds with straw mattresses. Everyone settled in their beds, placed their little suitcase which is his entire world, under the bed and we went out to tour the camp. It was separated, one part for men and the other camp part for women. There was no strict discipline. During the day, we could maintain activities, dance, sing, and even go to the women’s part of the camp with no problem. During the dancing, I noticed a nice’ looking, blonde young women, who danced passionately and it seemed she is enjoying the dance very much, and immersing herself into it.

I tried drawing her attention, during breaks from dancing, tried speaking with her. She knew only Hungarian and a few words in German, I introduced myself: “Eliezer Chico”, She introduced herself: “Edit Klein”. It was hard to have a conversation but I liked her. Sometimes I asked for help to speak with her, from people who could translate, I knew I want to

see her, even after I leave this camp. I didn’t want her to disappear from my life. One day, before I was about to leave, I walked to the women camp, Edit was laying in the sun, reading a book. I asked her, in broken German: “Wo Geiist?” – Where are you going? And she replied in her broken German: “Geiist in Kibbutz” – Going to the Kibbutz. “Wilst Ich Koma?” I asked, “Ya”, yes, she answered. This was almost the end of our conversation. Edit told me which kibbutz she is about to go to – Kibbutz Tel Yosef, and that’s how we parted.

I was in Atlit detention camp, for two weeks. We lived like kings there. The people of the ‘Yishuv’ (the Jewish community in ‘Eretz Israel’ prior to the establishment of independent Israel). So, the people of the ‘Yishuv’ brought us food, lots of food, apples, bananas, vegetables, milk, all the goods of the land. We use to get up in the morning, exercise, eat until we were full, hike in the area, talk, we waited for the moment of our release, to start out lives in the new land.

Atlit Detention Camp, 1946

20.

People who had a family, could leave. I had a family in the land, I had a cousin, Z’ako Chico. He arrived to ‘Eretz Israel’ before the war, opened a store for gold merchandise in Levinski St., in Tel Aviv, and was very successful. So, I was released and my cousin took me to him, in Tel Aviv. I lived with him a few days and then I transferred to an ‘Olim house’ on Aliya St. (The Jewish immigrants to Israel are always called ‘Olim’ – NOT immigrants, – because coming to the holy land, is considered ‘climbing’ like climbing the mountains to reach Jerusalem, only for the Jewish people, and only immigrating to Israel, immigrants are considered, ‘Olim’).

So, quite fast after I arrived to the land, I reached Tel Aviv and started working. A Greek fellow wanted to do good, and took me to work for him in a building in Bazel St., very hard work. In the heat of the month of August, I was carrying bags of cement on my back. There were I groaned under the hard and ruthless work that I was feeling sorry for myself that the Germans didn’t burn me in their furnace. I took any job, hard as it came. Together with some friends from Thessaloniki, we started working porters. In Salame St., there was a factory where they produced ethanol from grapes. We came to the owner and suggested to him that we can replace the Arab carriers. “We are porters from Thessaloniki” we said, “Thessaloniki’s are known as good porters, we made Aliya on the ‘Haviva Reich’, we know how to work hard”, we completed. The owner agreed and the next day we came to work and started loading sacks of black sugar on our backs, 120 Kg. each sack, the bee’s buzzed around us but we didn’t flinch.

The owner fired the Arab workers, and hired us.

Our name as good porters started following us. In the Hamasger St., there was a leather warehouse. A ship with ‘Balas’ – cows leather – arrived in port one day, and they found out that some water penetrated into the ship and the leathers absorbed water. So, they took us as a group of laborers, to carry these 400 Kg. ‘Balas’. We loaded the heavy cargo on our backs of two men and we walked, ‘Angaz’e’ – arm in arm, slowly, slowly we

walked, and that’s how we brought the cargo. We were four friends: Dario, Eduardo, Soto and I. Dario’s uncle enabled us to build a room inside a structure he owned on Levinski St. We went to the ‘Sochnut’, and said we needed money to build ourselves a room. (the ‘Sochnut’ was (and still is) the Jewish agency, helping ‘Olim’). We received twenty-Five Lira’s each, and we gave it to Dario’s uncle to build us the room. In the meantime, we stayed at the ‘Olim house’.

One of these days, a guy from a Turkish origin arrived at our ‘Olim house’ and started misbehaving and went wild. When I approached him to understand why and what is happening, he answered me with ‘Hutzpa’, (spoke with honor), I raised my hand and slapped him. The guy got scarred and left the place. The manager of the ‘Olim house’, saw that we managed to distance the troublemaker away, and he asked us if he could use our help, anytime he will have this kind of trouble, he promised us beds and blankets, in return. He also asked us to help him find empty rooms (in the city, for Olim’).

In Tel Aviv there was a difficult housing’ shortage. Many ‘Olim’ arrived and the construction pace was not catching up with the arrival of the ‘Olim’. It was known that on Tel Aviv building roofs, there are washing (clothes) rooms, or rooms that were designated for guards. Our task was, to find these kinds of rooms, to invade them and to hand them over to the ‘Olim house’, so they can place ‘Olim’- new comers, in those rooms. Between the portage work, and the room invading, I decided to take a few days of vacation to go visit Edit in Tel Yosef. I wore Shabbat clothes, bought a candy box and left.

When I arrived at Kibbutz Tel Yosef, I said that I am looking for Edit, a Hungarian young woman. They said: “Wait, she was seen in the vegetable garden, she will come shortly”. I waited a while and suddenly I saw her coming towards me. I was so astonished. She looked so pretty, so tall, ‘attractive’, she had a tan, wearing shorts which showed long, well-built legs, her blue eyes shined on her tanned face. She came closer and with a big smile, she stretched out her hand, to shake mine as a gesture of greeting.

I stayed in Tel Yosef two or three days, and when we parted, I gave her my address and said: “When you get a chance, come”. I went back to Tel Aviv and told my cousin that I have a Hungarian girlfriend. I wasn’t aware of ‘Ashkenazi; or ‘Sephardic’, I only felt that I got lucky. And really, Edit and I are big luck. All my life is fate. She came from a big family where they hardly noticed the kids and I come from a big family where I was hardly noticed, we both had missed a connection, both of us. She went through hell, and so did I. I ‘walked between the drops’ (a Hebrew idiom meaning – I was careful). There is no other couple like us. Up to this day, Edit always wants the best for me and I can see she enjoys that, and so am I, we are very tight – TIGHT. But I am getting ahead of the story.

One of those days, they called us for a portage job in Jerusalem, in the Anglo-Palestine bank which later was known as Leumi bank. They needed a 400 Kg. safe to be brought up the stairs, from the basement. We were told that in the old-city of Jerusalem, there are very good Arab porters, so we looked for a strong one, took him to the basement and he said: “Put the safe on my back”. We did as he said and he just sat on the stairs and did not get up. We sent him on his way and decided to lift the safe in the same way we saw on the ships in the harbor, we placed pipes, and rolled up the safe from the basement. (During the British mandate over ‘Eretz Israel’, the place was called: ‘Palestine-Eretz Israel’, that is why the bank was called: the ‘Anglo-Palestine’ bank).

When I returned from Jerusalem, my friends came to me and said: “The Hungarian is looking for you”. I forgot all about my fatigue, forgot everything else, and ran to see Edit. She was just standing there, among my friends, trying to talk to them with her broken German and hand movements. Beautiful, tall blonde, just as I remembered. I felt a big joy flooding me. I took her small back-pack she was carrying, and brought her to my cousin house. I told my cousin’s wife, this is Edit, my friend who came from the Kibbutz, she needs a place to stay until I can find a place for us. Although there was a language barrier, my cousin’s wife opened her arms to her and said: “You are most welcome” and received her with happiness.

We are together ever since. More than 60 years, for better or worse.

EDIT

1.

April 17th, 1920, early noon time. The frost covering the trees seem like thousands of expensive crystals. Bertha Klein doesn’t see that. She is walking heavily, carrying big bags filled with vegetables, fruit and dairy she had just purchased in the villages near Budapest.

Her advanced pregnancy is hard on her. The bags seem heavier and heavier… She wants to stop, rest a bit, put down the bags but she knows she can’t do that. Eight children are waiting for her at home. She needs to get home as soon as possible, to prepare lunch for her children and husband. She knows… if her husband, Herman Klein, will arrive home and the meal is not waiting for him on the table, no good will come of it.

Bertha is trying to walk faster. Cold sweat is pouring down her back despite the cold weather. (Chilly day). Suddenly, she feels a sharp pain, she stops, trying to get her breath back but yet, another sharp pain surprises her and her hands drop the bags. Carrots, Potatoes, cheese, all roll out of the bags and spread down the dirt path… She is holding her abdomen, moaning, her legs feel weak and she is looking for something to hold on to. People around her stop, they hold her so she won’t collapse and they call for an ambulance.

The pain blurs her sight, she feels it more and more, and she knows, her baby delivery day has arrived. She is lifted gently, by nurses dressed with white pure uniform and a white cap on their heads. The ambulance hurries as fast as it can, to the nearest hospital.

“It was a Christian hospital where I was born. They gave me a name: Edit. The Christians call me Magdolna, and in Hebrew I was called Ester. A ninth child to Herman Klein and Bertha Horn”. Edit remembers.

2.

My mother was born in the name of Bertha Horn, in a little village called, Sadmaros, in Taranchin district (Taranchin Mege). Today this district is in Slovakia. In those days, this district was in Hungary, part of the Austro- Hungarian kingdom. Mother did not talk much about her family. From the little she did tell us we learned that her family had owned land, and her father had a meat shop. Mother never spoke of any brothers or sisters, so I don’t know if she had any, or what has happened to them.

For some reason, maybe to visit relatives, my mother has arrived from Sadmaros to Budapest, and there she met the person who would be her husband and the father of her children: Armin-Herman Klein. My Father, Armin-Herman (He liked to call himself Herman, because he admired the Germans, and he thought they are superior to all) Klein, was born in Ungvar which was at that time, the capital of the geographic region Carpatorus. This area was part of the Ausro-Hungarian kingdom before the 1st. World War and today is part of Ukraine.

We also know very little about father’s family: His mother, has passed away when he was very young, His father remarried and the child who might have felt redundant in this new family, has spent most of his time in the street. Herman grew up to be a very handsome blonde, young man with blue eyes and good manners and with a good ability to persuade and express himself. He felt the area he lived in, at the far end of the empire, is too small on him, and thought he should try his luck at the big city – Budapest. As soon as he matured, he packed his belongings in a small suitcase, and left Ungvar without looking back.

Budapest, the capital of Hungary, was the right place for a smooth talker man with an aristocratic behavior, as he was. In no time, he became the successful agent, for a company which sold mineral water from a spring in Buda, and they provided him with two big Mercedes-Benz cars with a driver and a carrier, and so he became the Master. (These cars were very rare at the streets of Budapest, in those days.) He used to visit the shops and restaurants in the city, all dressed up with a nice suit and a brimmed hat, carrying a leather bag and working his charm, smooth talking

convincing the ladies to buy his mineral water bottles: “How many bottles does madam want? Three cases? Four?”. In every case there were 20 bottles. The carrier, unloaded the cases and my father took the money and bowed in-front of the lady, kissed her hand and bid her farewell. (Just to clarify, these were the years before 1st. World war, and Herman was very young). The company he worked for, was very pleased with his work. He knew how to speak well and he excelled in his job, and very fast he was appointed as the main agent for the area of Budapest, and all her surroundings. While doing that, one day he met Bertha Horn, who was quite his opposite. Mother was a quiet woman, modest and gentle minded, truly an angle. At the beginning of their mutual life, my father wanted a beautiful wife so very much and for that, he poured money and gifts and nice clothes, on mother, which made her look as an aristocratic woman.

Unfortunately, the idyllic days, did not last long. Father began spending his time playing cards and gambling, and started coming home smelling of alcohol. One day, while mother was pregnant carrying their first child, he arrived home drunk, and being so intoxicated, he pushed mother and she lost the baby. Mother said nothing. My mother was the best sole in the world. In no time, she got pregnant again and this time she gave birth to my sister, Rozzi. Then, one after the other, in a space of one or two years, came all the children. After Rozzi, Iboya-Sigalit was born and then Yoshke-Yosef, and then, Margit-Margalit and after them, Efraim-Feri, then Iren, then Arpad and I came as the ninth child. (Edit was actually, ninth pregnancy, but she was the eighth living child).

The frequent pregnancies, took their toll on my mother, and exhausted her. With no additional help, she had to take care of the cleaning, to take care of her children and husband, who demanded all her attention, with no consideration of the little children who ran around the house.

Iren and Arpad were born in the 1st. World war years, very hard years for Hungary as a whole, and especially for us. When the War broke out, a state decree was issued obligating all men to enlist. My father did not want to go to the army. He hid from the authorities, and waited until the war ended.

Between laundry and cooking, between taking care of the house and the big family, my mother had to go to villages outside of Budapest, to look for a little milk, few vegetables, fruit and maybe a plucked chicken to feed her family. The shops in Budapest were empty, the value of money dropped, the food and coal prices increased, and the black market thrived. Mother could not afford to buy in the black market, where would she find the money for that?

The war ended (WWI, then still called: ‘the big war’). Hungary was licking her wounds, but did not calm down. As the Ausro-Hungarian empire collapsed, big areas were torn away from Hungary, and were given to Czechoslovakia, (Among them was the Taranchin district where my mother was born). Some other areas, were given to Yugoslavia, and some to Romania. Hungary was declared a republic, but the main force was taken from the government hands by Bela Kun, a Jew, head of a Communist regime, which also did not last long. A ‘White Army’ led by the admiral Miklos Horthy, has risen-up against the communist regime. After a period of ‘White Terror’ against people on the left, and against the Jews, Horthy entered Budapest, took command over the government, and was given authorities of head of state and regent.

All these days when Hungary was wobbling between different regimes, father was in hiding, and mother kept taking care of everything by herself, looking for cheap supplies in far villages to feed her children and that is how she found herself in the street, carrying heavy bags when she felt labor pains, and was taken to hospital to give birth to me.

At home at that stage was Rozzi, left to take care of all her little siblings until mother returned from hospital with me in her arms. Not voices of Joy welcomed me nor dancing. I was another mouth to feed… I was a very skinny green baby, and I would not breastfeed, I didn’t want to eat. The government used to give milk for infants, but my older siblings drank the milk that was intended for me. How I survived? only God knows.

3.

My first memory is from the age of five. I remember myself, lying down on an iron bed in a big hall in hospital, crying my heart out. It was freezing cold, the bed was soaked with urine, and I was trembling from cold and fear, I just wanted my mother. I was sick with the chicken pox, and in addition, I was after a neck surgery which I don’t remember why. Also, two of my sisters were hospitalized due to chicken pox, but somehow, I was alone in a separated room. My mother did come to visit, but she was not let into my room because, in those days (the early 20’s), there was a lot of fear of this disease, and anyone who got sick, was immediately quarantined and a note was placed on his room saying: ‘No Entry: There is a patient with chicken pox in this room and the disease is contagious’.

Mother looked through the glass window, noted I was alone, lying in bed folded like a fetus in its mother’s womb, my skinny legs like a pair of matches, pick out of a short, wet hospital gown, me crying, looking so bad and she decided to do something. My mother, the quiet gentle woman, started shouting at the nurses and doctors that she forbids leaving me in that hall alone, no matter what, because I might die, God for bit. That act made them move me into the room with my sisters.

After me, Oronka-zehava and Latsi, were born and now we were 10 children at home. We lived in the outskirts of Budapest, on Horthy Miklos St., in a rented flat. All flats were rented, there were many flats to rent and this was very good, because my father liked to move us from flat to flat. I could not understand him… He didn’t speak with us children. My mother taught us that father was the Master, his God to us, and whatever he says is sacred, and we mustn’t say a bad word about him, so we didn’t. Father did not note us at all, he didn’t care about us. Outside the house he was a charmer to all, good looking man, dressed well with a beautiful suit and a brimmed hat, with a walking stick in his hands (symbol of honor, of that era) and everyone would be impressed and say to our mother: “What a husband you have”, but the moment he passed our house threshold, the good- mannered man disappeared.

He used to come home for lunch. The food had to be ready and the children were to be invisible… Mother had to prepare the best food for father, made out from the best products, and only after he finished eating, we, the children could eat. He needed to eat in full quiet.

We were poor because of my father. Regretfully, I did not have a proper father.

My mother was traditional. She wanted us to have Jewish education, so we can sense the Jewish holidays, she prepared them properly. Father did not object as long as nothing obligated him. On the eve of a holiday, he wasn’t home, did not join us for the holiday meal, and especially wasn’t there to chant with us the holiday songs. He used to go to a Cafe, play cards, maybe even lose money there, lived a life of a man without a family burden on his shoulders.

Since I remember myself, father gave mother money that was enough only for grocery shopping although, he earned a great deal in his job. Every night father used to come home, open his leather bag and empty it on the enormous table which stood in the kitchen, and all his earned money of that day would pour on the table, and we were expected to organize it by coins and bills. There were coins of half a penny, penny coins and paper money, bills. Our job was to roll the money in packs of 50, to organize everything and to write on each pack the quantity it contains. We sat for hours doing that, sorting out, counting and rolling the money and then placing all that in a cupboard. We were very naive and loyal. We never took a penny. This was the upbringing, in those days. The men were the masters of the house, and they decided everything. The woman was at the bottom of the ladder.

4.

Mother did everything by herself, she managed the household working from dawn to the late hours of the night. She had to cook for twelve people every day, because there were no refrigerators. She had to go to the market to buy the groceries. She had to clean the house, do the laundry, patch the

clothes, iron, and take care of the children. Our poor mother, did not have enough time to look after us, so we children, took care of each other, the big ones took care of the little ones, but they were all good children. We could have been wealthy and well established, and we could have had all the good the world had to offer, because father earned a large amount of money. He had a good sense for business but he wasted all the money he earned. He had an addiction to gambling, and especially horse races gambling, and that is where the money went. The business and the gambling were the only things that he took interest in. He used to come home only when he needed the services of the house: Food, Cleaning, Laundry, a good bed. His automobiles stood by the house, and people showed him their respect, for him that was everything. The children? They will raise themselves… of-course we did not attend nursery or kindergarten because father did not provide the money for that. We grew up in the street, in the back yard together with more tenants – all poor like us.

My father had relatives in America, who used to send us packages from time to time, including some used clothes and some canned foods. They heard our economic situation is dire, and they wished to help. After 1st.World War, the United States enjoyed an era of economic prosperity and growth, everybody had a dream of reaching the land of unlimited opportunities. The relatives sent a travel ticket by boat, for my big sister Rozzi, to come to America. They suggested she will come first, since there was a demand for talented seamstresses, and she could prepare the path for the arrival of the rest of the family. Rozzi was contented, a way for a new life, out of poverty, has been opened up for her.

The ticket arrived and my father saw the letter and the ticket, slapped my sister and shouted: “You are to go nowhere! You are staying here!”. My sister’s crying did not help nor her pleading. Mother did not dare to intervene, and father took the ticket, sold it and wasted the money. The relatives were so angry, that they disconnected all ties with us. That is how the only hope Rozzi, and we, had to escape the poverty cycle, has vanished.

5.

I was 6 years old give or take, when father decided to move to a different apartment. We moved from Ujpest (the 4th quarter of Budapest), into an apartment closer to the center-city. At that time, I started attending school. The bigger children also attended the ‘haider’ (Jewish religious schooling for young ages), in the afternoon, but Arpad and my little sister Oronka, my small brother, Latsi and I, did not learn in the ‘haider’. The days and the atmosphere, was different.

School opened a new world for me. Not many days past and I stood-out in all areas: in learning, in sports and in sociability. I had an open-mind, I was something else. In Math, I was the best student in class, I could calculate really fast, the teacher didn’t even finish asking the question, and I already raised my hand. I knew the answer. The teacher asked: “What is this? Are you being taught at home?” I laughed sadly, and replied: “Who will teach me? I am hardly noticed”. This was a natural talent. The teacher was very impressed by me and after five years of learning, she suggested to my mother that I should transfer to middle school, where the level of teaching is higher. (in Hungary, everyone had to learn eight classes in primary school and then four classes in middle school). And so, I was transferred to middle school.

It was a Hungarian girl school, and indeed, it was higher level of learning. We studied many fields: Geography, Physics, Math, sport, and many more I can’t remember. In this school, I stood-out again, especially in math. The teacher who liked me and valued me, asked me to help one of the students in my class, a girl from a family, much better than mine, but she had problems understanding what the teacher taught in class. I agreed and at the end of the school day, I went to her house. They had a nice, well-kept home and they welcomed me very nicely, and treated me to coffee and cake. (At home we never had coffee and cake, we could not afford it). I enjoyed it there. I explained the learning material to my class mate again and again, it seemed like she understood, but then when she was asked in class, she knew nothing from what I taught her. I went a few more times but, when I saw there was no progress, I stopped.

I had four teachers who really pampered me. The main teacher who was also the math teacher, called me Roza. One of the girls made a remark: “But madam, her name is Edit, not Roza”. The teacher responded: “For me she is Roza”. Also, in Geography lessons the teacher felt I had a sense for it and chose me to stand in-front of the world map, and point with a stick to the places she mentioned in class. (Until this day, I know where every place is and people around me are impressed and ask, how do I know that. I have no explanation. One has a sense for some things).

Once a week, there was a Hebrew lesson. The Christians had a religious lesson, and we had a Hebrew lesson. There were four grades: a, b, c and d and in every grade, there were 4 classes. They assembled us Jewish girls, from all classes and grades, and taught us Hebrew. The teacher was a short lady who knew Hebrew, and she taught us a little reading and writing, some stories about the holidays, but I forgot everything.

More than everything, I excelled in sports. I was the ‘star’ of Jumping high and I also played basketball and handball. The sports teacher understood that I had some talent. Up to this day, I have a talent for sports and I like that. (My husband goes to the pool and practices sports, because of me. Also, we took our daughters to the pool, from a very early age). In school they took me to engage in competitions, shows, I was everywhere.

While life at home was very hard, in school, I was a queen, both in learning and sports, and also socializing. I did not study at home, there were no conditions for that, I just remembered what the teacher told us in class, I remembered what she talked about a month earlier, no one else remembered, but I knew.

The teachers loved me, gave me responsibilities, I was responsible for the order in class, before the teacher arrived. In Physics, the teacher asked me to help her carry the equipment, and the tools, and help her prepare the experiments in class, and gave me more duties that showed how much, I was loved and appreciated by the teachers.

Some people said the teachers were antisemitic, but I didn’t notice that, they did not relate to me being Jewish. Also, my friend’s attitude towards me, wasn’t affected by me being Jewish, nor did they treat me different

due to my poor clothes. I didn’t care about clothes. My mother couldn’t take care of us, so my hair was cut short in order to prevent the spread of lice. I looked like a boy.

I didn’t feel different than others, only one girl had clothes that made me jealous. She had a dark blue pleated skirt, and a blouse with stripes and a sailor collar. How I wanted a skirt and blouse like hers, but for me this was only a dream. I dressed very simple. I did not get new clothes until I was 7 years old, father did not give mother any money to buy us children any clothes. My sister, Rozzi, was a talented seamstress, she had very good hands, gentle, and she used to fix and match the clothes that passed over from child to child. These clothes were also not new, unfortunately we also got clothes that were handed out from Jews to the poor, before the holidays. Father was not ashamed about that. He didn’t care, he didn’t show interest, didn’t speak, never asked how we were, or what did we do, nothing. He was an egoist, he cared only about what belonged to him. My mother was bright, but her loyalty to him surpassed everything. She bared her suffering in silence, never yelled, never hit us, did everything always in a quiet way.

In my last grade in school, I performed in-front of the whole school. I asked my poor mother to come to see my performance, how I jump, but no one came. I stood at the edge of the stage, looking for any one of my family members, someone to come and cheer for me, and will be proud of me, no member of my family came, not my mother, of-course, not my father, my father didn’t care. All the other students had their parents come to watch them perform, and I was the only one alone. I was photographed, and I wanted my mother to be near me so much, to be proud of me, for her to see how much I am loved, and appreciated, but mother didn’t come.

I was 14 or 15, I could have continued that and develop my talents if I had a father who would care for his children. There were so many fields I was very good in, the whole school knew me especially, because I was a good athlete and everyone showed interest in me, and when there are celebrations and everyone sees what she does, one earns appreciation and respect. I really had a good time in school, I had Christian friends and I felt no different from them.

One thing cast a shade on my happiness in school. Father refused to pay for my studies. There was a fee of 5 or 6 forint but my father refused to give the money. Every day the school headmaster called me to her office, demanding the payment. Every day I stood at her office, embarrassed and ashamed, looking down, my eyes full of tears thinking, ‘how can I tell her father won’t give the money?’ I used to come home crying: Mother, why won’t he give the money? The school needs to be paid.

Mother did argue with father, even fought with him, until he agreed, sent his hand to his pocket and gave us the necessary amount, while getting angry and grumbling over an expense, that seemed totally redundant. We could have opened the cabinet where the money was kept, he didn’t know how much he had, but our loyalty and devotion, and even stupidity, this kind of up bringing, has prevented us from touching the money, not us children, nor mother.

6.

A little after I started my studies in school, my father decided he wants to buy a big house where everyone will have a room, and has a garden and a pigeon striker. (he loved pigeons). He bought a house in a far place, in the suburbs. In order to get to the house from the train station, one had to walk a long way through groves. There was a lake near the house which was dry in the summer and filled up in the Winter. Nearby was a path to the house.

The house was indeed bigger than before, but we did not enjoy. It was far from the city. I don’t even know how mother managed with the grocery shopping. I can’t remember. We lived there for a few months. My big sister Roza, worked as a seamstress in the city. One of these evenings when she came home from work, walking through the groves, she was attacked in the dark. She was very lucky that eventually, nothing happened but her fear stayed-on and she said to mother: “I can’t live here, I am afraid to walk that way, and what if they attack me again? I am leaving this house”.

At that time, she also met a guy, not Jewish, his name was Tibidor. His parents lived in one of the villages or towns in the area, and they were considered ‘aristocracy’ of their village. Tibidor worked as an accountant and earned a good living. Rozzi left home (if you can call it home) and they lived together. Father didn’t care. He did not show any interest, mother understood her and came to terms with it.

A few months passed and it was no longer convenient for father to live in this house, and when something was not convenient for him, he fixed it. So, we moved back to the city, again changing homes and this time at the end of the city, near the train station. It was not a big apartment: in the entrance, there was a kind of a hall, then two big rooms, a big kitchen and near it was a ‘Speise’ – a big balcony with glass, this was our storage for the conserves: the vegetables and conserve fruits, and the jams we prepared every summer from the fruits of the season. It was good for us there. We were in the city.

Many children came to learn in school from the little towns and villages near Budapest. They came by train, and since I lived near the train station, I waited for them and we walked together to school. It was around 3 km walk and we used to walk and talk, laughing with great pleasure. When they returned, they had to leave class half & hour before the end of school, because their train back home was very precise. We envied our friends who left early while we had to stay.

7.

Around my 7 years old, Rozzi, my big sister, left home to go live with Tibidor. One day they decided they are going on a two-week vacation to Belaton lake. Belaton lake is a sweet-water lake. The water is blue- greenish, and very clean, surrounded by lots of green all around it, has tens of swans and ducks and other winged creatures, swimming calmly in all that blue. The lake is also surrounded by small villages and towns which look like a painting and visitors come from all around Hungary. (The Hungarians call it as a joke: The Hungarian Sea).

Rozzi and Tibidor, rented a flat in a village near the lake, and took me with them so people won’t talk gossip about them. I was there to make believe they are not alone. I didn’t understand anything, I was a child of 7 years old and people on the street said to Rozzi: “You are such a young woman already with such a big girl” Rozzi replied immediately that I am not her daughter, but her sister.

Before our trip I couldn’t sleep. Never in my life before that, have I left Budapest, especially not on a vacation. My sister Rozzi, who was an amazing seamstress, made three new dresses. One I remember vividly: tight close-fitting, red dress and under the waist, it had 3 layers of fabric in-front. I don’t remember the other dresses, only this one. Before that, I never had nice clothes. Tibidor taught me how to row a boat, I rowed from one village to another. They both sat in one side of the boat and I was on the other side, the boat tilted to the side but I managed it. In the village there was a small train-car standing on a railway track. There were also many leaches in the lake, I collected leaches and placed them on the railway track and started pushing the train-car. I was strong like a young man. I pushed and pushed until the train-car accelerated and as it moved, I jumped on it as it ran over the leaches. I enjoyed that very much. Everyone admired my big strength since I was a very skinny girl.

During our vacation we swam a lot in the lake, we walked a lot around and there were fruit trees on the streets that anyone could pick from. We also climbed on the mountain that slope downwards into the lake. We reached it’s top after walking through a dense green forest. The top of the mountain seemed like it is sitting among clouds, with a breathtaking view. I inhaled air-picks over there. I felt like I am floating in a world of fairy- tails. I was never pampered, never left town, poor family, no money, so for me this was the best vacation ever!

Very rarely we were given money on Saturday nights to go see a movie. The movies were mute movies, no talking, and in the hall, there was a pianist who accompanied the movie with tune. This was the only recreation.

8.

My siblings grew up. Ibie finished her school years, and started working as a cashier in a meat shop. Yosef grew up into a handsome young man. He grew up on the street, became a football player and the head of the children group. Those children, were children from homes that there was not a proper father noticing them, no proper room for them at home and a mother who is busy pleasing the father. Yosef finished school and started working in a store, starting dressing nicely, since everyone in the store dressed elegant, he liked that. He had to be an apprentice for 3 years in order to learn the craft – to learn the types of fabrics, to learn how to address clients, how to sell, he loved it and was so happy, but not for long…

My father had a lot of pressure in his job and he needed an assistant. Without thinking of what is right for my brother, he took my brother out of his job in the store, and when my brother dared to resist, my father slapped him two slaps and said to him in an unambiguous way: “As of tomorrow, you are coming with me to work”. My brother had no choice, he had to give up his will to become a vender in a men’s clothing store, and had to obey father. Father gave him part of his root, taught him what to do, and Yosef managed. Yosef was a very smart shrewd young man, part of the money he earned he kept for himself, he gave father only some of it.

This was not the case with my brother Efraim. He was a ‘mommy’s boy’. The only one of us who was religious. He used the Tefillin, he read the Tora on his Bar Mitzvah. Efraim had such a nice voice that he was asked to fill in for the ‘Chazan’ (Cantor) in Synagogue, when the cantor couldn’t come. Efraim was a very intelligent boy, sensitive and gentle. Years later, we learned that he joined the ‘Jewish Scouts’. At that time, we didn’t know. We were not living in a, Jewish area, we lived near the Christians and we didn’t know what he was doing. Later, we learned that on Saturdays, he used to go out on trips with the scouts and learned a lot about Israel and Judaism and became very religious. After several years he joined the Communist party. In those days we were all in danger of a

death penalty if one knows of someone joining the communists. We didn’t know. At the same time Efraim learned to fly gliders and above all, he learned how to drive and that saved his life.

Father took Efraim to work for him in the mineral water vending as well. “You need to work with me” father ordered. Efraim had no choice, father was cruel. Poor Efraim, he had to endure a lot of father’s bad words, because he did not understand – he was a child after all – one needs to receive the same quantity of bottles as given to the buyer. If there is shortage, then he needs to pay for it and there were always problems with these things. Efraim always had bottles missing and I remember father always shouting at him: “You are stupid! Jerk!”.

Efraim was very gentle, like my mother, he was not a business man.

My third brother, Arpad, completed eight years of studying in school, and did not want to continue. He also joined father in the mineral water business. He was a blonde child, nice, with blue eyes, he looked like father. My sister Margalit, was a beauty with flowing, brown hair and green eyes. She studied sewing in one of the known, sewing workshops in the city. After three years, she received a certificate, that she is an ‘Elite Expert’ seamstress. After a while, when she could afford it, she left home. It was hard at home because there was hardly any room, it was impossible to bring someone home, not a boyfriend, not even just a friend, so she rented a studio apartment in the center of Budapest, not very far from where Ibie, lived. It was an apartment with a big room, bathroom and a place to cook. She received her customers there, and worked there. Many times, mother would send me with cooking pots filled with her cooked food, to give to Margalit.

The situation at home was becoming worse. My father was smoking heavily, and very often would suffer from Nicotine poisoning. In addition to that, he had high blood pressure. He was not careful, kept eating high sugar foods and his condition was bad, and as that worsened, he became very suspicious and blamed mother with false accusations like, she is cheating on him. It became crazy, really crazy. He was a handsome man and for sure he got involved with other women. Today (says Edit), I am

sure of that. Then, we never thought of that, but today, I know. My mother could not stand all the stress and the endless fighting, and she had a small stroke and was hospitalized. We, the children also suffered from the bad environment at home and since it became obvious that mother could not go on suffering like this anymore, the big siblings decided that the parents need to separate. The boys will live with father, and mother will stay at home with the girls.

They rented an apartment and father left the house, thank God. Since then, we had no other connection with father, even to his funeral I did not go. (He died at the age of 56). So, the boys went to live with him but Efraim was very attached to my mother, and every day he came to visit her and spoke with her about things that were important to him, about what is happening in the world, about what is going on in Hungary, about Politics, about his dreams. (Efraim lost his life when he didn’t come to Israel, if he had come, no doubt he would succeed in life, and become a significant figure in the country).

A little while before father left the house, my brother Yosef, married Mantsi, and moved to live with her at her mother’s home; Ibie had met Miklosh-Mikie, a handsome man who was much older than her, a Christian from an aristocratic family, very good looking, almost two meters high, a captain in the cavalry, and they moved to live together in a beautiful apartment in center-city. (My sister was also a rear beauty, and even received an offer to be taken to Hollywood).

Efraim was drafted into the army. He was enlisted by law, which obligated all men who arrived at the age of 21, to enlist to the Hungarian army for a two-year period. Efraim did very well in the army, despite him being Jewish. He was an expert sniper, made it to a Maestro rank, and received many decorations for his excellence. His arm and chest were filled with red garments on his good achievements as a sniper. Later, he was an ammunitions transport driver, thanks to the driver’s license he had.

At that stage, at home were left: Mother, Irene, Arpad, Oronka, Latsi and me.

9.

In 1935, my childhood ended. I completed my school studies, and had to join the work cycle, to take part in the family livelihood. Mother was not fit to go to work, she gave birth 12 times and the hard life with father, left her exhausted and worn out, a small skinny woman that at the age of 60 looked like a very old woman.

My sister Irene, who is older than me by 5 years, worked in the ‘Tungsram’ factory, where they produced lightbulbs with incandescent- wire, which spread lighter light than the regular lightbulbs. The factory’s owner, was an English man who rented it to the Hungarians. It was a modern factory, with outstanding conditions in terms of the pay the women workers received, and in terms of the treatment they received from management. Working there was every young woman’s desire. It was hard to get a job there and Irene was lucky.

I was looking for a place to work at.

At that time my brother Efraim, completed his army service and had to decide what next. My brother Yosef, had an idea: He will give Efraim money with which Efraim will buy a grocery store and I, who is known for my good mind in mathematics and my fast calculation, will run this store. The idea sounded good but Efraim, was no business man, he had no mind for business and he bought the store cheap, in a poor neighborhood, filled it with groceries and sat me there. I was fifteen years old, with no experience, no knowledge in that, except my mathematics. I didn’t know what it meant to manage a grocery store. I sat there from dawn to the late hours at night, the customers came, bought but did not pay, they ‘bought on credit’ So, I wrote every purchase. At the end of the month when the payment day arrived – the people disappeared, didn’t pay and did not come. A month past, two months, the store has accumulated big debt, my brother lost all the money and there was no other alternative, but to close the store. We were lucky that the man who sold the store to my brother, was willing to buy it back, and this way my brother salvaged some of his money.

Again, I was in a need of work.

10.

I was lucky and found work in a bakery. It was a bakery which supplied bread and rolls to many stores in the city. The owner of the bakery was Jewish, and she was running the operation very assertively. Nine young men riding bicycles left the bakery with big baskets – full of bread and rolls – attached to their backs. They left with full baskets, they would unload in the stores and come back to fill the baskets again to distribute among the stores. My job was to count the rolls and the loaves of bread, which were put in the baskets, and to debit the stores accordingly. My job started at six in the morning and ended at eight in the evening. The pay was not high, but I had my meals there during the day, and I was allowed to take home a loaf of bread, every day. That was also some help. I was young and had strength and worked more than I was asked to.

Across wide Hungary, bad waves against the Jews started spreading. Since the Nazis came to power in Germany, the Hungarian leaders have partnered with Hitler, and the antisemitic voices, in Hungary, became stronger. Jews were displayed as un-loyal and leaning towards Bolshevism. We heard rumors about Jewish students in universities, who were beaten, we heard about restrictions on the number of Jewish students who could be accepted to academia, we heard about Middle class Jews with free professions, who were injured. We, the poor, did not feel the changed attitude towards us yet. We were not a threat to anyone, so we were not hurt. Even the doorman in the house we lived in, the ‘House Meister’ who was known as antisemitic and a Jew hater, treated us nicely and highly respected mother, welcomed her in a good manner.

We were unable to predict the storm which is about to occur.

One day, the bakery owner did not arrive. This was unusual. We were used to see her near the ovens, running here and there giving orders, checking the bread loaves before they go into the ovens, and checking them again when they came out, brown and full of good warm smell. Her absence was ominous. We didn’t have to wait long or guess, the bad message arrived. The lady passed away. Her death was a hard blow.

We all worried for our job and indeed, not long after, her sons announced that they are closing the bakery, especially because of the fact that at that time, the first restrictive Jews law, had past, limiting businesses owned by Jews so Jews were not allowed to own business anymore. The bakery closed and I, found myself again with no work. ‘What do I do? we need money at home’. My younger sister, Oronka, has completed her school studies and got very lucky. She was accepted to work at the factory Irene worked in. She was settled. They had good salaries; half they gave to the needs of home and half they took for themselves.

11.

My friend Irene Wise came to my rescue.

Irene and her sister Magda, have arrived to Budapest, from Serbia, with their father. The father left his wife – their mother, in Serbia – had arrived to Budapest, and opened a bakery shop. He was a cruel father. Worse than mine. My father didn’t show interest in us but did not hit us. Irene and Magda’s father, had hit and abused them, he forced them to work in the shop and in addition to that, he demanded that they work in another place to earn a living.

Irene worked in a weaving factory. When she heard I was looking for a job, she said she will talk with her manager to see if there is room for me. I was lucky and her work manager agreed and I was admitted to work.

But I did not know how to weave…

At that time, a course was opened in the factory where they taught the principles of machine weaving. The main principle was exchanging the threads so there will be continuance – to attach the new thread in the ‘spoolny’ (the wire coil) to the end of the thread, already inside the machine. The point was to hurry and replace the ‘spoolny’, to make sure the thread is replaced before it’s finished, and to place the ‘spoolny’ inside a wooden dish looking like a boat, which had a pinhole in its end where the thread was inserted. This ‘boat’ was moving to the right and left and weaved the horizontal threads, inside the vertical threads, and that is how

the fabric was being formed, to knit the new thread with the old one and to attach it in a way the knit will not show, so there will not be any stripes on the fabric (if the thread is alone, a stripe appears and then the machine must be stopped).

As the course continued, I was working next to a senior worker that had a lot of experience, and I could see how the work is being done. After a few days, I was placed to be responsible for 4 machines. Each machine worked 5 minutes. Every five minutes the ‘spoolny’ ended, so every five minutes it was replaced. There was need to work fast, to run from machine to machine, and to be very vigilant to see, which machine the thread is about to end, and to replace it. If I was not quick, I could not work there. There were machines which worked slower, but then I was in charge of eight machines. I loved it. As an athletic, I looked at that running work as sport. Near every machine there was a carton board with the machine number, the name of the machine worker, and a clock showing the productivity of the machine.

My productivity was the highest. The work was hard and tiering, from six in the morning until 2pm, eight hours of unstopped running in a hall where there is deafening noise from all the machines, needing to be completely focused with no chance to have a word with a friend, or any possibility to think of anything else except the threads in the machine, and still, I was pleased. I was working and earning my living, I had money to give the home needs and money for myself. I loved dressing nicely. Some of my clothes I got from my sister Margalit, clothes which did not suit her anymore, or clothes she was tiered from, and so she amended them to my size and measurements. Some of the clothes I knitted, especially blouses and some, I bought in installments. Life was not expensive. We managed with what we had.

My brothers also worked and earned money: Arpi, was an egg agent. He bought eggs in wholesale and distributed them to the stores. He was riding a bicycle with a wooden board attached on his back, and the eggs were placed on the board. He moved from store to store, selling his merchandise. In the evenings, he used to sit and check the eggs in the light

of a lamp, to see if they are fresh or not. If he saw an air bubble under the peal, that meant the egg was fresh, if not – the egg is old.

Efraim that failed in managing the grocery store, worked in a factory where they smoked chunks of goose. He received a vehicle with three wheels from the factory, and he transported them from the factory to the stores. From time to time, he brought home some pieces. He was lucky to have a driver’s license, a very rear thing in those days, and that is why he found work despite the limitations on employing Jews.

Times were hard and we had to be creative, in order to find work.

12.

We worked all week and on Saturday, we helped mother clean the house and cook. I helped more than everyone else.

In the factory I met Joseph Benza, a Christian guy who finished his high school studies and waited to be accepted as a train vice manager. In the months he waited, he worked in the weaving factory I was working in, he stood by the machines and wrote. What he wrote, I don’t know, but during his work he looked at me, trying to meet my look. Up to that time, I didn’t yet show any interest in guys but he was very good looking and his attention flattered me. One day, when work finished, he approached me and asked if he can walk me home. I agreed. That is how our friendship started. Every day We would walk that road from the factory home and we even kept talking at the entrance and we found it hard to say goodbye. I loved talking to him and being with him. “Why don’t you invite me in?” he asked. ‘God’, I thought, ‘What if someone came into our home and saw the chaos?’

Our apartment was a two, big furnished rooms: in the living room stood a big sofa ‘knape’ – a wide sofa with no back and no handles, with a rising for the head only on one side, upholstered by velvet. My younger brother slept on it at nights. A cupboard, with wooden doors carved with roses and leaves, and at the top was a woman, carved by an artist, this cupboard stood against the wall. This was a souvenir from one of my father’s crazy

ideas. When father was still living at home, a truck stopped at the entrance of our building and two big cupboards carved with roses and leaves, were unloaded together with two enormous beds. At the front of each bed, there was a wooden board with the same carving as the cupboards. The back of the beds had soft round lines, which came down from the center of the bed until the bed margins. At the top, there was the same woman head carved, as on the cupboard. How I hated this furniture. The dust that accumulated inside those engravings was a nightmare. With a thin brush, which could enter all these slots and turns of the roses leaves, we managed to take off the dust and later we spread oil to protect the wood. We stood for hours to clean every slit and slot (since then I always make sure the furniture in my home will have straight lines).

In the kitchen there was a big wooden table, with six chairs around it. In the center of the kitchen there was an oven build by bricks, that was heated by wood, and had a fire burning all winter. The rooms were not heated, it was not worth it to use Cole, wood was cheaper. Before every winter, we bought round wooden logs, and place them in the storage in the basement. In the basement there was one log, standing steady and on it I use to split the other logs to many wooden chips, I would then take the wooden chips up to the house in a basket, and put them inside the oven for burning. All our lives were conducted in the kitchen. In the unheated rooms, it was cold and freezing, the kitchen was warm and nice. On a regular basis, a samovar was placed, so we always had hot water, on the stove there were pots with cooked foods.

Since the kitchen was the most, warm place in the house, it was also used as a washing room. There was a big washing bowl standing on the side, which we would fill up with hot water from the Samovar. We placed everything on the shelves of the wall, the shoes rested on the lower shelves, beside them are the slippers and next to them the shoe brushes. On the upper shelves lie the soap, the sponges, tooth brushes in cups, the towels, and also notes and messages.

As much as I tried to organized, a mess still resided in the kitchen. Today, when I think of that, I am ashamed of myself, thinking why didn’t I place a curtain to hide all the mess. But these were the conditions I lived in and

that is where I brought Joseph Benza to, he became a permanent visitor in our home.

My life was conducted between my work in the factory, and the work at home. As long as there was work and money for living, I saw no problem. I didn’t know a different life. Every morning, even before the Sunrise, I left for work. At 2 pm my shift ended, and I returned home to begin a new working day at home.

One day I went to the bathroom in the middle of the shift, and I stopped the machines. Not only me, whoever went to the bathroom, had to stop the machines so the threads will not finish, and stripes will appear on the fabric, but one needs to go to the bathroom in eight hours of work… The work manager (who was Jewish) was walking around the hall, saw the machines not working. When I returned after a few minutes, he started shouting at me as his face got red: “What is this??? Why did you stop the machines?! What is going on?” I tried to explain to him that I was in the bathroom, I showed him my productivity board, to show him my productivity is the highest of all other girls, but he was too angry and he would not listen and kept screaming. “How old are you?” he asked shouting. “Seventeen” I answered. “You are big enough to work at night as well, as from tomorrow you move to night shift” he announced. (There were three shifts: First shift from Six in the morning until 2 pm. Second shift from Two in the afternoon until Ten at night, and Third shift from Ten at night until Six in the morning). I had no choice, I could not say no, or refuse. I lied down and cried all day, everyone goes to sleep when I need to get dressed and go to work, it was hard for me.

It’s dark, winter, cold, everything is covered with snow and I need to leave alone at night hours. The factory was not far from home so when I arrived, I forgot everything, I managed to concentrated and keep excelling at my job, but I did not manage well the upside-down day I was forced to live. I arrived at home in the morning and could not fall asleep, and at night when I felt so tired, I had to go out to work. For a while, I tried to get used to it but I couldn’t stand the night, and when I realized I can’t do it, I told my mother I had to get out of this and I left the factory.

13.

I could not allow myself to remain without work, the house needed its livelihood. I searched the newspaper for jobs. I worked as a salesperson in a department store at the center of Budapest, when they needed more venders at the ‘End of Season’ sales. I worked two weeks here and two weeks there, didn’t earn much but worked constantly. It was really hard finding a job.

The solution came again, through my friends Magda and Irene Weis. They have had enough of their father’s bulling, so they left him and rented a room with a family. The owner of the house, from which they rented the room, was working in fixing nylon stockings. This was an expensive product and no one threw it away. If there was a ‘train’ in them, or if an ‘eye’ fell out, it was given for repair. There were, woman who specified in mending the stockings, using a special machine. Irene told me that her owner makes good living from mending stockings and She suggested I try it. I went to a place where they rent a machine for a month and they teach how to activate it.

I have good hands and good quick catch, and within 3 days, I controlled all the machine secrets. I learned to mend stockings: to lift all the ‘eyes’ around the tear, using thread and needle, to ‘catch’ an ‘eye’ row and attach it, I studied the work perfectly. I brought the machine home and placed it on the table in the kitchen, and went out to find customers. I went into one of the stores which specialized in mending stockings and suggested I will come to pick up the stockings, mend them, bring them back and then we can split the income.

Slowly, I expanded my customer’s cycle. I worked long hours, sometimes after midnight, but the revenue was good and I made more money than in the factory, and the most important thing was that I was my own Boss, my time was mine, I was independent. I bought a pair of old bicycles, and rode them all through town to take and return stockings. I persisted with this work until the German entered.

Since I worked at home, all the house work was on me. My sisters left in the early hours of the morning, to their jobs in the lamp factory, and they

had to walk a five km. distance to the factory. When they finished 8 hours of work, they needed to walk all that way back home. They arrived exhausted and had no strength to do any house chores. Lazi was still young, so it was obvious to everyone that I, was the one that needed to help mother.

Before winter, we went to the market and bought big quantities of carrots, root and cabbage, which we stored in boxes filled with soil in order for them to preserve until the cold winter days; I carried very heavy baskets filled with tomatoes and peppers, which we cooked inside boiled water pots. We pickled them, we soured them and filled jars which we sealed, with a special waxed paper and closed that with special string. The sealed jars were placed in rows inside the big water tank, which was used for laundry and we boiled it again so it will preserve well all winter months. After the preparation work has finished, the jars filled with the conserves, were placed on the shelves in ‘Speise’ – inventory for winter when the universe was frozen.

In order to add meat to our menu, I used to buy, from time to time, a big goose, 12 kg. was his weight. I stood in the market and saw how they open the goose and divide it into chunks, and so, at home I would place the goose on the kitchen table and everyone would watch me take a sharp knife, clean the goose, take his skin off and separate the fat from the skin. We inserted the fat into heavy pots, well covered, and that is where we kept the goose livers. These pots with their content, were also placed inside the ‘Speise’ which was a room without any windows and that’s why the cold was kept there, like in a refrigerator. The goose thick skin, I cut into small cubes, and we would fry and eat them. After I undress the goose out of his skin, I would make an exact cut under the wings and separate them. Each wing was so big that it was sufficient for the whole family. After that, I separated the shins, then I sliced the chest into slices, and at the end I took out the ‘kishke’, cleaned the fat out of it which we used for cooking, and the liver which weigh alone more than a kilo. Cutting the goose and separating his parts was like a show, me in the center, and everyone around me watching how I chop it up, and separate it into pieces. One goose was enough for the entire family.

I worked hard, hardly had time for friends but I did not complain. Did I have any other option? Who will do all these jobs? Who will take care to bring wood and heat the apartment? Food, cleaning. I was young and had to help. Today in retrospect, I think how hard I worked and the worse was still ahead, I didn’t know.

14.

In the meantime, in Hungary, the propaganda campaign against the Jews has continued. Hungary has become dependent on Germany and tried to please the Nazi government.

After the 1st. World war, Hungary, lost big areas which were given to Romania, Czechoslovakia and to the new country Yugoslavia. Hungary, did not accept that, and tried to get these territories back in every way. In the year 1933, the Nazi party took power in Germany, and Adolf Hitler, announced that he supports Hungary’s claims, and promised to return her territories that were ripped away. In return, Hungary, was demanded to persecute the Jews and express antisemitism, just like in Germany.

While we were fighting to make a living, turbulences had occurred not far from us. We did not yet know, how much this turmoil will influence our lives. The first one that was influenced by it was my brother Feri (Efraim). In 1938 Hungary received large areas back in Carpatorus and in Slovakia and the Hungarian army, was sent to these places to show Hungary’s control, and to prevent unrest. Feri was called to service, as an ammunition transporter. Since he had a driver’s license, and not many had that these days, Feri was considered essential to the army, despite the fact that his last name was Klein – a clear Jewish name – and although the Hungarian authorities have discussed the possibility of not enabling service of Jews, in the army. Despite all that, he was called to service again and again, once to Carpatorus, once to Transylvania, and another time to Yugoslavia, and in all places, he stayed a few months until the waves have calm down and then he returned home. Feri was so talented and intelligent, and the officers found an interesting man to talk with and liked him very much. Respectfully to his important service, Feri received a certificate with a

statement that he is not recognized as a Jew, and therefore immune to the laws concerning the Jews. This document has saved his life from the horrors we endured.

Despite the exterior turbulence, our lives were routine until Spring of 1941.

In September 1939, Germany has invaded Poland, and 2nd world war has, began. At this stage, Hungary, had not yet joined Germany. The occurrences in Poland and Austria were not more than a notice in the newspapers, which did not influence our day to day lives. I was working in mending stockings, helped mother with the household work, and dated Joseph Benza (later, I found out that his parents were against our friendship. He never spoke about his family and did not introduce me to them and I, never insisted on that).

My sisters Irene and Oronka worked in the lamp factory, Latsi studied, Arpad was working in his egg business, Margalit who lived her life in center-city, was considered an Elite seamstress, and had a complex relationship with a married man, Feri was working between his service periods, in transporting smoked goose chunks, Rozzi lived with her husband and children in the village, and Ibie continued her life with her husband and from time to time, came from the luxury neighborhood she lived in, to visit mother and us in the poor neighborhood, we lived in.

15.

In Spring of 1941, an order was issued, which obligated all Jewish men, who were not in the army, to serve in the ‘working-units’. My brother Yoshke (Yosef) was among the first ones to be drafted, and after him Arpad was taken to a working camp, as well, still inside Hungary. A short time later, they were about to be sent to follow the Hungarian army. I brought Arpad to the train station where all the men who were drafted, were assembled. There were tens of Jews, in the train station all equipped and ready for an unknown road. Women held on to their husbands, fathers,

brothers, and cried quietly. Arpi was sad, said goodbye to me, and added: “I don’t believe I will stay alive”. That was our last meeting.

In mid-1942, the second Hungarian Armia, was sent to fight the Russians, alongside the Nazis. Together with the soldiers, thousands of Jews from the working units, were sent also. Latsi, my little brother was among them. We never heard or seen him since.

Later, we learned, that after a long tiering journey in a cattle car and walking a great distance, the recruits arrived to the working camps near the Hedon river. The work in the front was so very hard. They prepared fortifications, they carried ammunition and equipment, while they are being used as carriers of the wagons, instead of horses. They paved roads and dig trenches, and mainly dealt with mine clearance which they did under fire, both from the Russians and from the Hungarian soldiers. They were the forced laborers serving the Hungarian army, subjected to the soldiers’ arbitrariness and abuse, in every possible way.

Among the soldiers that were sent to the Russian front, was also my brother, Feri, who served as a driver of ammunition and therefore was involved in the East front battles. How ironic it was, that both my brothers were in the same places in the same time, one in the Hungarian army, and the other humiliated by the same army soldiers. When the soldiers returned defeated and beaten, Feri returned as well and told us what really happened there in Stalingrad: After the German attack on Moscow, has been halted by the Red Army forces, which caused big losses to the Germans, Hitler decided to gain control over destinations in south Russia. Among those was Stalingrad, which is situated on the shore of the Volga River. The battle for Stalingrad took six months. Hundred-thousands, have been killed, injured or taken into captivity to Siberia, where they suffered so much, that it was even worse than dying in battle. The Hungarian and German soldiers who were not accustomed to such hard climate whether as in the Russian wilderness, have suffered hard from the extreme cold and many froze to death, for others their feet froze and they suffered excruciating agony. This was the first battle the Germans were crushed overwhelmingly, after a campaign of conquests all over Europe, the Hungarian ‘Armia’, was partly diminished and partly withdrew in

panic. Even while backing-down, the Hungarians, did not release the poor Jews, that accompanied them against their will. The soldiers who were not killed, injured or taken captive, came back home humiliated and ashamed. The forced-labor who managed to survive, were sent in accordance with German demands to the ‘pit’ in Serbia, to work in the copper minds. Yoshke (Yosef) my brother was among those who were sent to the ‘pit’. He never told us what he went through, only bits here and there, and that is how we learned about the big suffering he had to endure. They worked in awful conditions: Eleven hours work a day, and for that they received 227 grams of bread a day and a bowl of very watery soup. They worked standing in water which reached their knees, and had to breathe stifling air, full of dust and gas. In their spare time, as on Sundays, they were forced to engage in house work: they chopped wood and handled maintenance and fixing chores. For every violation they were punished with cruel punishments. Arpi could not handle all that, he was weak. A few months after they arrived to Russia, he died. The Germans killed him. We did not tell that to mother, and she kept waiting for Arpi to return, she waited and wept.

16.

March 19th, 1944, started as another regular day. My sisters, Oronka and Iren, left very early to their job in the ‘Tonesram’ factory. Mother was busy with the house matters and was moving heavily, looking sad. Since my brothers: Yoshke, Arpi and Latsi, were taken to the working camps, it was like the light was taken from her eyes and all of a sudden, she looked very old.

I was sitting at my sewing machine, finishing amending stockings, which I promised to deliver that same day. After finishing my work, I placed the stockings in the bag, and asked mother if she needs me to bring anything on my way back. Mother said she didn’t need anything so, I left the apartment, went down the stairs, took my bicycle, the doorman greeted me as always, and I went out to the street. The air was cool, the sun was out shining in a clear beginning of Spring light way, but the street was

different. Everywhere little tanks were parked, and in addition armored cars with German cars were there. I didn’t understand where so many tanks came from…

I climbed back home and felt afraid to go out to the street again. I opened the radio and heard the Germans have occupied Hungary. A few days earlier, Hungary head of state, Miklos Horthy, was called to a meeting with Hitler in Berlin. The Germans have used his absence from Budapest, and invaded Hungary. In Budapest, a government trustworthy to the German, was formed.

Since that day our lives had become intolerable, even more than before. It was dangerous to go out to the street. The Hungarian fascists have gained control of the streets, use to get drunk, grab young women and rape them. We were afraid to go out. It was catastrophic. I was blonde and didn’t look like a Jew, but I also was afraid to go out. I didn’t have papers, it was very hard, I don’t know how we managed. I still worked a little at home from acquaintances, but I was afraid to ride the bicycle so I walked. There were Jews that were taken to an unknown destination, they disappeared and no one knew what had become of them. The fear was big.

I had remembered that in 1942, in one of the nights, the police knocked on a Jewish family door who lived close to us. The police just took them since they didn’t have a Hungarian citizenship. They were not the only ones. Whole families were taken out of their homes since they had no citizenship, and moved them to the border area, Kamenets-Podolski, in the winter, and left them there. These families were frozen to death or died of hunger or, were killed. We were very lucky that father arranged a Hungarian citizenship for us, so we were saved from deportation at that time.

Since I had no other option, I went back to work in the weaving factory so we will have some money to live on. We still hoped for the best. People who managed to flea Poland arrived and told terrible stories. Poland was under German occupation already for five years, and many refugees arrived from Poland to Hungary. They spoke of the horrors the Germans are doing to the Jews, but people didn’t believe them. We didn’t think

something like that can happen to us. Yes, there were laws against Jews, and they did take the Jewish men to working camps, but still, we could work and live.

17.

Approximately a month after the Germans entered, they announced that all Jews need to leave their apartments and move into the ghetto. The ghetto was in Oipesht, in new Pesht, the area we lived in, but in a distant neighborhood. The Germans evicted people who lived there and placed the Jews instead. (The evicted people were probably given Jews apartments). We had no choice, we took a ‘Ryukzak’ – a backpack, and placed in it some personal items and cloths. We packed little packages with some food and fat, we had buckets of Jam, we took them too and left our apartment moving to a different part of the neighborhood, to the ghetto.

We were led to the place we needed to live in. We were lucky and the apartment was fairly good, two rooms furnished, a bathroom with a toilet inside, this was a luxury.

My sister-in-law, Yoshke’s wife, was together with her sister staying with their third sister, in Kiskunhalas. Unfortunately, we wrote her a letter saying that we are moving to the ghetto, and we don’t know what’s coming next and, that their apartment might be taken. My sister-in-law and her sister decided therefore to come to Budapest and see for themselves what is going on, and that resulted in them also forced into the ghetto, so now we were: Mother, my sisters Oronka and Iren, and I, in one room. My sister-in-law and her daughter and her sister in the other room. In the beginning we managed not bad at all, the ghetto was not closed physically and we could get out in the morning to work and return until 2 pm. Starting at 4 or 5pm, leaving or coming into the ghetto, was no longer, allowed.

My brother Feri, stayed at home. He was not considered Jewish, so he did not have to move to the ghetto. Stayed alone at home and worked in his work. Rozzi, lived in a different neighborhood and their turn haven’t

arrived yet. Later I heard her husband sent her and their two children to the village, to his mother. Ibie, lived with her husband in the center of Budapest. I don’t know if the neighbors knew she is Jewish, she stayed in her apartment, her husband was also taken to the war, he was a captain and participated in the war in Russia. They had a luxurious flat and a live- in maid, there was a room for the maid near the kitchen. Ibie received letters from her husband in Russia, but the maid stole them. Poor Ibie was worried sick about her husband since she heard nothing from him, and from all that worry, she became ill with heart disease. When she figured out the maid stole the letters, she sent her away.

I did not visit any of my siblings. I had no possibility to do that, no time, we worked and there were no telephones. Sometimes, Ibie came to visit Mother, but basically since we moved to the ghetto, she did not come, because it was too dangerous. Margit lived also in center Budapest, she received a certificate from Raul Valenberg, that she is a Swedish citizen and that is how she was saved.

After two weeks we spent in the ghetto, two of my sisters who worked in ‘Tonesram’ factory told us that Jews who are excellent workers, are given the possibility to live there and be protected. They moved to live there, and I stayed with my mother. My Poor mother was Sixty-four years old but looked much older than what I look today. After 12 baby deliveries and the worries about the boys in the working camps, she was devastated. My sisters left and we tried to go on with our routine life, we said to ourselves: ‘Maybe God will help, we will stay here until the war ends, all we need is patience’. We started hearing that the Russians are not far, we did not know what the Germans are capable of doing, killing more than five hundred-thousand Jews in a month, out of the eight hundred-thousand Hungarian Jews, was something we could not imagine in that stage. It seemed crazy, beyond understanding.

Two weeks later, also my factory, enabled excellent Jewish workers to live inside the factory. I said I want to do that, very much, but I have a mother, what can we do with her? “I am sorry but we have our orders”, said my manager. So, I did not move to the factory. What could I do? Leave my

mother by herself? I couldn’t. We stayed together and thought that is how we will spend the remaining period until the war ends.

18.

One morning We heard loud knocks on the main door. “Open!” “Open!”.

S.S. Men and Hungarian gendarmes came in shouting: “Quickly! Quickly! Take your belongings and get out! We are taking you to work!”.

They lied to us of-course. They lied to us all the time. They didn’t want people to know what is about to happen. “Don’t take many things” they shouted, “Where you are going you don’t need many things”. I did not understand the meaning of what they said, who could have thought these

things happen in the world? What did we do? What was our crime? We had a back-pack, I don’t even know where from, I placed it on my back and inside a little food and some clothes. I gave Mother 3 long loaves of bread, and we went out to the street. At the entrance of the other houses, stood tens of people shocked and frightened. The Gendarmes passed between the people asking who has valuables, gold, silver: “Hand it all over, now!”. They threatened us: “If not, we will check on you… even there…” they meant they will check our body, even our private parts. They were looking for gold, we didn’t have gold. I didn’t have a ring, nor earnings, nothing. My sister-in-law was a hero, she had a gold neckless, she threw it into the toilet, and pulled the water down. She preferred not to give it to these thieves.

They led us to the train station, while shouting and shoving us all the way. There we were pushed into train-cars. They pushed more and more people, tens of people inside one train-car, terrible crowdedness, all that and we don’t know where they are taking us.

I was not paying attention to the road, because I was in charge of my mother, and kept looking at her to see she is ok. I was still optimistic. I could not think of something bad. I said: “work? So, we work”. I am used to hard work. It did not bother me. That is how they ‘fixed’ us, that’s how they lied to us and that’s how we did not understand. We were so naive that there is no forgiveness, but there was nothing we could do, where could we run to, without money and papers?

The train stopped. We saw a built-structure and a pile of bricks next to it. It was a brick factory named ‘Budakalasz’, located in the other side of the Danube River. (The city of Budapest, is situated on both banks of the Danube: one bank is Buda and the other is Pest). There were already so many people there, crowded together under the sky, without shelter, holding their bundles, each person with his/her bag. Family near family with the food they managed to take from home. Tumult, noise, screaming, crying, people calling for their loved ones, people arguing over a place to stand, people running around to understand what is this place and why, what for? At the edge of this site, armed gendarmes pointing their guns towards the people. They didn’t stop shouting: “Quiet! Quiet! Don’t

move! Anyone who moves, will be shot!”. We heard people being beaten, we heard shouts, maybe they caught someone, and it does not matter if he did anything or not, it was meant to frightened us.

I found a corner, and placed our packages down, seated mother, and tried to understand from those who sat next to us, if they know what we are waiting for. We didn’t know why we were brought there, nor how long we will remain there. In recent period, we lived in great uncertainty, no one knew what the next moment will bring.

In the ghetto we had a neighbor, she was maybe thirty-five years old, and alone. She liked me and we bonded. After my sisters moved to live in the factory they worked in, she moved into our apartment to live with us. She was a free spirit woman in her behavior with men, that, I understood even though, I was naïve, but to me, she was very nice. She was a strong woman and guarded me like she is my body guard. Since she had no family, she joined our group and that is how we arrived together to the brick factory.

While I took care of mother, this woman (unfortunately, I forgot her name) started walking around, trying to figure out what is going on. Two tall men wearing good clothes looking elegant and wealthy, stood next to us, they looked very confused, they had no package or bags in their hands. Apparently, they were caught at the middle of the street in the center of Budapest. At the center of town, there was not yet a ghetto, there people were caught as they walked down the streets. People were asked to show an identity document, and if this was a Jew, they would be placed on a freight car at that very moment, and brought to where we were located. These two men had no food, no water, we felt pity for them and gave them from the little we have. We didn’t know what will happen, but we shared with them what we had.

In the meantime, the woman who was with us, returned and told us that there is a little group organizing, to give water to the new people arriving by train. It was very hot, and more and more people arrived by train and the first thing to do was to give them water. We were allowed to do that, to take buckets full of water and give people.

I joined that woman and we joined that group. I didn’t want to just stay there sitting with mother on the ‘Korlat’. With that group I felt useful. We stood there waiting, equipped with buckets full of water. Another train arrived. People from nursing home, some paralyzed in their lower body. They were taken out of their beds brutally, and pushed into the train cars. When the train stopped, these paralyzed people were just brushed out of the wagon. Still, we did not yet understand, what will be our destiny if this is how they treat elderly people, and even if we did understand, where would we go? We would be shot. There is nothing we could do. We looked at these disabled and old people with mercy. Why didn’t they kill them in the nursing home? why didn’t they give them sleeping pills to let them fall asleep forever? They could not stand up and they were thrown down like a pack of rags. We sat them down, and gave them water and I hope they didn’t suffer too much. In the meantime, rain started pouring on all of us and we got socking-wet, all our belongings got wet and there was nowhere to go. It was awful.

We were about ten days in the brick factory site, under the sky, in the street with no shelter. We could not sleep, there was not a moment of quiet. I was on the move all the time.

One day we heard another train is about to arrive with ‘Tonesram’ workers. There were already thousands of people in this location, but I said: “My god, I have to find my sisters, at least try to find them among all these hundreds of people arriving”. I started running along the train- cars, calling their name, asking people at every train-car if they know where the workers from ‘Tonesram’, are. “Where are people from the light center?” I asked. Someone said: “Over there” so, I ran to that train-car frightened I might not find them in this multitude, but they heard me and saw me. It’s impossible to describe the joy of this meeting. If I was not in that position (giving water), I would not see them. There were thousands and thousands of people there, and you know no one. We hugged and kissed and I took them to mother, who was so happy we reunited. What big luck, if we were not all three together, we would not survive.

The situation became worse from day to day. More shouting to frightened us, shooting, beating, abuse and crying. All happened by the hands of

Hungarians, the Fascistic ‘Nilusis’. (Nilus is a ‘name’ for Christians in Hungary, because there was a religious movement by this name). I don’t know where such hatred for Jews, came from. As a child I did not feel any hate from Christians, I had a Christian boyfriend, my sisters married Christians, I did not come across such Jew hatred, until that moment.

Every day, more and more people arrived, the food we brought had reduced. My brother Feri, came to visit us there, he held the paper saying he is not a Jew in his pocket so, they won’t catch him too. How much courage was needed to do that, unbelievable. The neighbors gave him milk for us, we drank it with pleasure, we didn’t have milk for so long. He hugged mother and cried: “How can I get you out of here?” But where could he take us out too? Even if he could take mother out, where could she have gone too? If she would have been caught, the situation would get worse. We had no money. Maybe if we had money, we could pay this person or that person, in order to get papers or shelter, but we had nothing, we were poor.

We separated crying, from my brother. He had a very hard time detaching himself from mother because he was very attached to her. He promised he will try to visit again soon. We saw him walking farther away and did not know that this will be the last time he will see mother.

19.

Sitting doing nothing and not knowing what will happen next, was very hard. Every day, was worse and there was not much food left and we asked ourselves: what will happen? Why are we waiting here?

One of these days a rumor had circulated that anyone who wants to work should get on the train. We took our few belongings and stood in line to get on the train. They picked people, got them on the train and sent them away, we thought we are being taken to work, because they kept saying all the time that they are sending us to work, so there will be no chaos. People don’t go to the slaughterhouse willingly, they fight. Why didn’t we fight? Because of all the lies. They said we are being sent to work and we

believed. We said: “what can happen? It will be better to work than to stay here”, so we too got on the train. My sister-in-law did not want to come with us because her sister’s husband has run away, and they thought he will come to rescue them. No one thought we are taken to a death camp, no one could imagine such a thing, we thought: ‘work, so we work, what can happen? We work, we are used to work’.

That was a mistake, the (heads of the) Jewish community knew for sure, what is happening because the Polacks (Jews) arrived before, through the Carpathian Mountains, and told awful things that no one believed. People said: “Jews always like to create chaos”. But there is no doubt anymore, that the Rabbis and the community management, knew that an awful thing is happening, they were taken as well… People were so naive, didn’t know, didn’t shout: ‘Don’t go because you are being murdered! Try to escape!’. No, everyone was silent. We got on the train. They put us inside cow wagons, pushed more and more in, men, women, children, elderly, there was no place to sit, only stand, the air was compressed, all the openings were closed, just a little barred window.

We organized ourselves in a one of the train car corners. We placed our packages together and sat my mother down on them and we as guards, stood around her. In the far corner of the wagon there was a bucket for our body wastes, in the other corner a bucket with water to drink, suddenly we heard a knock. That was the guards closing the train-car with bolts. We started to feel a slight movement, the train started moving slowly, almost unfelt. The first day passed somehow, it was hot inside this wagon, no air, it was Summer already, the month of June, people were thirsty, the long stand was tiering, mothers and fathers with children on their hands, babies crying all the time and as time passed, the stress went up and up.

The train rode day and night, once they let us off, I don’t know where it was, in Austria or Czechia, we got down to drink a little water, and back to the compressed train-car. In the second day, people started to go crazy. We were closed in a train car, no air, June, children crying non-stop and suddenly it was quiet. It seems the children died of exhaustion, from thirst, heat and suffocation. In the third day, a man stood in-front of the closed door and screamed: “Jesus help me!”. We looked at each other: ‘what is

this? Are you Jewish? If you are not Jewish – you need not be in this wagon and if you are Jewish – what do you want from Jesus?’ He kept screaming in an in-humane voice: “Jesus, help me! Jesus! Jesus!” and suddenly he became silent as well, he also probably died, it was nerve racking for people.

The train continued with her journey, carrying the dead with the living. Night came down, I was standing by the small window, the moon light entered through the barred window and the inside of the shady car, got a little light. The car was quiet, too quiet, suddenly I see that one of the two men who were part of our group, those who were caught in Budapest, is changing in-front of me. I can see his eyes are starting to roll. ‘How can that be?’ I ask myself, ‘eyes can’t roll, the muscles will tear’ but – no, the eyes kept rolling and turning, both eyes and in-front of me he became a monster. The other man found a place to lie down near my mother’s feet, he was lying down all folded-up with his legs very close to his body. Now, I see the man that his eyes are rolling, getting close to the man who is on the floor, about to strangle him. It seemed that he lost his mind. His hands already on his friends’ neck, about to kill him. I had a pocket knife that I took with me for whatever necessity. I looked around, ‘Is no one seeing what I am seeing? God, what will happen here? he will kill his friend and then will kill my mother, and then all of us? he lost his mind’ I thought. “Be careful” I shouted, but the man lying down could not get up, I said in my heart that, If I do nothing, we will die here. I opened my pocket knife and stabbed him on his hand. No one saw, it was dark and only the moon gave a little light. From the pain, the man let go of his friends’ neck and got back to normal. The man who was lying down, jumped from his place and for a moment everyone froze, like they were under hypnosis, and the next moment they started hitting the attacker with their long bread loaves, on his head. They beat him until he lost his conciseness. I feel guilty about what I did, but there was no other choice, I had to do what I did. In retrospect, I think if I knew mother will have such a death, I would prefer that he strangles her. That would be easier…

The next morning, we arrived to Auschwitz.

20.

The train stopped. The doors were opened and shouting started: “Everybody, Raus! Los, los, los,” – “Quickly! Quickly! Quickly! Everyone down, leave your packages! We got down frightened and started walking. A long line of children, women with babies on their arms, people holding their children’s hands, elderly people, young people, all walking with S.S. Guards around, holding their dogs, rushing us to hurry up. We walked through the gate with an inscription on top: ‘Arbeit macht frei’. They lied to us even up to there. ‘Arbeit mach frei’ meaning: work will free you. how their lies worked.

On both sides there were blocks – long barracks and frightening cleanliness everywhere, not one match on the ground, not a piece paper or cloth. A few young women with stripe cloths and a head-kerchief were moving on the rails quietly and, one smiling officer – Mengele. We didn’t know who he was at that stage. We saw a nice young man smiling, that relaxed us a bit, nothing bad can be here, work is work. We still believed. We stood in line and they divided us: Elderly people, women with children on their arms, pregnant women – on one side and young people – on the other side. They took our mother to the elderly people line, together with her was an acquaintance of ours, I was glad mother will not be alone and told them to keep together. Poor mother, looked at us and said: “I will not see you anymore”. She was wiser than me. I saw that on the side there was a truck standing near some stairs, with which they climbed to the truck. Mother got on the truck. That was the last time I saw my mother.

I didn’t think of mother’s fate. What was coming ahead was so appalling, that we did not have time to think what is happening to mother. That is what Hitler did to us. They stood around smoking cigarettes, laughed and sent us to hell. Someone cried out: “Mother! Mother!” immediately the officer said to her, with a smile, “You want to join her – please”

We didn’t know what is waiting for us.

We walked forward. They kept hurrying us shouting: “Let’s go! Let’s go! Hurry up! Hurry up!”. We stopped in-front of a building and they said to get in, there are showers here, to take our clothes off, and stay naked, only

with our shoes on. I had very beautiful shoes, Suede grey with a platform and around the ankle, there was a strap. I had nice legs and that was the fashion. I was a young woman and thought to myself, ‘I will take these shoes so, I can walk with them and this way they will stay with me’.

It was a German Nazi’s mania, to undress people and leave them Naked. Naked people lose all their confidence. A naked person feels exposed, un- protected. We were so embarrassed. I didn’t even see myself naked in a mirror before at home. I was ashamed. There were men everywhere. They took us in as groups, groups to the shower, they didn’t give us much time to wash, no soap, no towel, nothing. Just us, our body and our skin. We left the showers and they rushed us into the other room. There, we saw men sitting and shaving the women everywhere. The men were Jewish, and they did not look us in the eye, they looked down, lowered their head and worked, they had to work. Fist they shaved our heads, took everything off and then you were no longer human. We became monsters. Then they shaved our underarms, our pubic hair in our genitalia, everywhere. They saved all the hair somewhere, I don’t know what they used it for, that shocked us but we had no choice, we lost our identity, we went as a flock, with everyone.

After they shaved us, they sprayed us, it burned terribly. On the side, there was a pile of clothes, someone stood there and threw clothes at us, without any distinction. They didn’t check if the one is tall or short or skinny and I was given a mini skirt and a shirt, no underwear, no headkerchief, no towel, what is on you – is what there is.

They threw us into the yard. “Wait”, they said. We came out and didn’t recognize each other. Everyone looked the same at that moment, we were all head shaved, humiliated, with no identity. I felt my heart shrink in fear. We looked for each other and held hands, so we won’t lose one another. This was the beginning of July, awful heat and we stood there bald, in the sun, not a trace of shade, we were not allowed to move. I said to myself – ‘we fell into a trap and I don’t know if we will ever get out of this’, and still, we did not know what expects us.

As the evening came down, we were placed into a block, a long shed and in the middle, throughout the whole shed, there was a square, concrete- body that looked like a heater. Near the door there was a small room, for the ‘blockeltasta’ who was the block principal. There were two or three young women, who were called ‘shtoboba’ – the helpers. There were no beds, not even benches. Inside, a thousand women tight with one another because there is hardly no room to lie down, to spread their legs, so we lay down with our legs bent, one placed her head over the others legs and so on, rows and rows of Women in a half sitting position with their legs all curved in.

Before we went to sleep, they gave us a little piece of bread, a little margarine and that is all. We felt hunger since we didn’t eat for a few days and our stomach started to grumble. We didn’t yet know, that this will be the constant hunger that will not stop bothering us. We were tired and exhausted that we didn’t even think where our poor mother is, what is happening with her, we had no idea. Luckily, we stayed as a group – my sisters and I, and the women who was in the ghetto with us and also, two more friends of my younger sister. We tried to sleep and hell broke loose: We were lying down on concrete, people with no underwear, felt cold and wanted to go to the bathroom, but – Not allowed! They didn’t let us go. The toilets were at a different block and there were screams reaching the sky. There were people who could not hold it and they wet the place they lay down on, and the ‘blockeltasta’ came with a stick in her hand and started hitting. She was very strong and beat people with no mercy, lifting the stick up with all her strength and shouting: “Quiet!”, “Quiet!”. Anyone who was close to her, got hit with the stick. That happened every night. We tried to move away from her so we won’t get the stick, we were quiet, they called us ‘The three from Budapest’, the three sisters from Budapest, we were gentle and quiet and did not disturb.

The next day, maybe not the next day, may be in the middle of the night, I don’t know when because there was no watch, we had nothing on us, it’s impossible to understand what it means a human being who has only the clothes on him, no bra, no underwear. It was still dark outside, they told us to get up and organize in group of five, and form a line for ‘Appel’ (Inspection).

We learned words we didn’t know and waited for an S.S. Man to come and count us, Oy-vey if someone was missing.

It was impossible to flea Auschwitz. The camp was surrounded by barbed wire fence with electric wires holding high voltage. Any touch in the fence caused electrocution. Many who got fed up with life died this way, they approached the fence and got electrocuted. Along the fence there were armed S.S. Posts with their finger on the trigger, ready to shoot. The worst hardship was in the ‘appel’, in the counting order. We stood there for seven or eight hours, people fainted, unable to stand, wanting to sleep, wobbling,

shifting weight from foot to foot, for moments, seconds we fell asleep standing up and then, woke up again, it was awful.

It was the hardest for the ones who stood in the first lines because they had to stand all the time. Those in the middle lines, even if it was very dangerous, could even bend a little and even sometimes to sit and rest a bit on the ground. These were the hardest hours. After counting, we entered the sheds and were given the little piece of bread with margarine and dirty brown water which they called ‘coffee’. At lunch, we got something that tasted like dry straw. It was mixed with dark flour. In Hungary, it was given to the cows. Not everybody could digest it, it was plain straw, dry straw, and this was the main food, and soup.

Prisoners from the block brought big water tanks with soup to the block, these were very heavy tanks, filled with depleted liquid mixed with dark flour. Four or more women, had to carry it together, since it was so heavy. There were no forks, no spoons, there was only one pot for every five women and this pot was moved around from one woman to another to drink at her turn. It was very hot and burned our mouth, our lips. Whoever was first to drink it suffered the most heat, but what could be done? We were hungry and we ate. Still, we lost a lot of weight. They did not take us to work. Our day revolved around the long ‘appel’ standing hours and the fight for food. There were always fights over food. The person who got the soup at the bottom of the tank, got the thick part, got soup with essence. We all wanted the bottom of the tank, but only the ones with benefits, got to get soup from the bottom of the cooking pot. There was a child with us there, may be 16 years old, with a young mother and one time while the helpers – ‘shtoboba’, distributed the food, a fight broke out over something and the ‘shtoboba’ slapped the girl’s mother, and the girl who saw her mother being slapped, took the boiling soup and poured it on the ‘shtoboba’. We did not see them anymore, not the mother, nor the daughter. People disappeared.

My friend’s sister who was a daughter of elderly parents, a spoiled girl, could not adjust to the food. One day, two days, could not eat, her gums got swollen. She was taken and we did not see her again.

That is how the days passed, we were at our lowest. We didn’t speak of what is going on with us, we were so depressed until we said to ourselves many times, that it’s better to be dead than to live like this. That was our life, every day the same: waking up at 3 in the morning, standing in ‘appel’ in a row of five, in long lines where the ‘blockeltasta’ count us, counts again and again, and after standing for hours that seemed endless, an S.S. man comes all cheerful, invigorated and refreshed, probably after a good night sleep and good food, and counts us again, together with the ‘blockeltasta’. Our legs heart, our body aches, hungry, thirsty, with body wastes…

There were those who lost balance, they got beaten to death. We saw they were taken away. Those who could not hold their bathroom needs and defecated there, were taken away as well.

Next to us, there was a block with faucets on one side and toilets on the other side. The toilet was, a pit, which was dug along the length of the block structure, and wooden boards were placed over it, so one can squat. We lost all shame, we went there, washed ourselves a bit, no towel, no soap, we had to guard well, the rags that we had over our body, the clothes, because everyone wanted an addition of fabric.

To keep our humanity, I bought a knife from someone in the kitchen for a piece of bread. Bread was the ‘currency passed to trader’ in Auschwitz. People traded bread. Even people who worked in the kitchen didn’t have enough bread. Everyone was hungry all the time. Iren and I, had a piece of bread left, and for that I received a big knife with which I sliced the bread we received, to thin slices and spread the margarine on top, and this way we ate like human beings and not like animals. It felt better, felt like something of a cultured person was left of me.

This is how six weeks of hell passed. One day they came to choose girls with nice legs. The ‘blockba’ – the one responsible for the block – stood us in line, to look at our legs. I had nice suede shoes and I got a mini skirt. In my upper body I was very ugly: bald, not clean because we didn’t have showers, I was not a ‘human being’, but my legs were fine. They chose me and a few more girls, and said the girls are being taken to the Nazis

for sex, for prostitution. My sisters and I looked at each other, thinking: ‘What will we do?’. fortunately for me, there was a big commotion and under the cover of that noise, I managed to run away and get back to the other women’s lines. Later, we heard awful, terrible things about what happened to those young women.

Bit by bit, we started to hear what is going on here because the ‘shtoboba’, the block director helpers, started saying what is happening with the mothers and babies, with the elderly. They said that all of those people are being sent to the gas, and then their bodies are being burned. We didn’t know, we were closed and could not move and when a new train came, we were quarantined so we won’t talk, God forbid, and won’t tell what is going on here. They had a smart brain, genius and evil were the Germans. We understood what happened to our poor mother. We said to ourselves: ‘Maybe she was lucky and did not suffer much, Maybe, she fainted from the gas and that was that’.

The ‘shtoboba’ told us that, from here no one gets out alive. They pointed out to the crematorium and said: “Everyone went up in fire. Everyone was burned, you will be there in the fire, you can see the fire there in the crematorium, that is where you will be burned”. They too were miserable, if I think of that today, they were there for years, got their jobs and at the end were also killed. There was no longer any pity towards anyone. The suffering was so big, that there was no longer an ability to feel pity to one another. This is a feeling that is impossible to describe. We sat and waited, didn’t work because we were in line for extermination. We didn’t even get a number because it was not worth it for them at that stage, we were to be eliminated soon, but it took time because they didn’t have enough gas for the crematorium. Yet, the incinerators worked in an increased pace, the Germans knew their situation in the army front was difficult and they tried to hurry up to finish as many Jews, as they could. There was nothing we could do. We felt at that stage that, we will definitely die an awful suffering death one of these days.

Still, there is fate, and if a person’s fate is to live, he will live.

21.

One day, a man that looked like a doctor came and said he is looking for people to work. Like always in incidents like this, we had to take off our clothes, stand naked with our hands over our heads. My sisters and I, were the first to take off our clothes and stand with our hands over our heads. He wanted to see how we look physically. We were so embarrassed that we didn’t know where to look… Their mania, their cruelty to look at us naked… They knew this is the most humiliating moment for a human being, when he is forced to stand naked trying to escape the feeling, not knowing how to cover himself, but we needed to try every way possible, to get out of Auschwitz. women in the block have warned us not to go: “You will be sent to the gas” they said. I thought to myself: ‘if they send us to the gas, we will suffer 5 minutes, we die, and that’s it. if we stay here, we will also die but we will have to keep suffering everything that

is happening here, so why should we stay here if there is a possibility to get out? maybe it won’t be gas?’

The German pointed at me, at Iren, and at Oronka, and a few more young women, and we left the block. They took us to a block where there were showers, and again told us to stand naked and then get into the shower. There was no way of knowing if it won’t be gas but we said: “What will be will be, if we die then that’s it and the suffering will stop”.

We walked into the shower; We were happy to feel that water is what is coming out. They gave us a short sleeve, long dress made out of denim and there was a number on the dress. Again, no underwear, no bra, no socks, nothing. Unfortunately, I had to leave the knife I had.

We were loaded on open, rail-carts and headed north. This train passed a forest, we also heard the sea, the waves voice was loud, we could smell the sea salt, and according to the signs, we were on our way to Danzig. We arrived at Stutthof camp near Danzig. We were placed inside a built- structure that had a big room with straw on the floor. First time in six weeks we could sleep with our legs straight. It was like a dream. Stutthof was a concentrating camp, where people were sent to work. Inside the camp, there were smaller camps divided by barbed wire fences. I saw people and even spoke to them although it was forbidden. We were happy. The food was the same, straw on the floor but there were not any ‘appels’ and we could straight our legs during the night and we got some air. It’s weird to say, but we were almost happy, although we had no idea what our destiny is, we learned to survive from day to day.

One day we were given something that looked like beet soup. We went with a plate, without a spoon of-course, no cutlery, just the plate but still it was an improvement compared to Auschwitz. Here we each had a plate. I started sipping the soup and felt I could not swallow. The taste was horrible. I stood with the plate in my hand thinking: ‘What shall I do? I can’t eat this’, I felt like I will get sick any minute and vomit, and suddenly I see in the camp opposite me, a Russian soldier with a big knife in his hand, staring at the food, hungry. He looked like he is almost crazy from hunger. He was looking at my plate and I was looking at the knife in his

hand and then I got an idea. I made him some signs pointing at my plate, showing him that I am offering my plate in return to his knife. He understood me. Somehow, we managed the exchange, what joy I felt, I had a knife again. I ran to our sisters and told them happily that I got a knife and that will help us, and it saved our lives.

We were in Stutthof for two weeks, it was the end of August or the beginning of September, we didn’t know the actual date unless we heard it by chance, someone speaking and mentioning a date and then, one day they stood us in line and said nothing. Just: “Stand!”. I pushed the knife under my clothes, so it won’t be seen. We were given coats. I got a Russian coat with fur and it was long down to my ankles. We were also given white tricot ‘gatkes’ (long underwear), they changed our shoes, gave us wooden shoes with fabric on top, no socks, and these were our shoes now.

We thought, now they will take us to work.

They gave us food – a piece of sausage, I don’t know what it was made of, we found it tasty. A piece of bread and margarine, I sliced the bread and the sausage with the knife and we ate like human beings, a flash of ‘human being’, it was important to me, others disrespected but we ate calmly like at home.

They loaded us on open rail-carts, like a children train, and it drove inside a city, so we got to see Stutthof. Despite the fact that we were in a bad shape, we felt the beauty: little houses with red roofs, nice tidy gardens, just like in a fairytale. We sat inside the rail-cart and ate, looked around us and said: “Is there such a nice world?” It was totally weird. We live in hell and around us there was such a beautiful world, acting as usual, as if there are no death camps, as if there is no eradication of Jews, people are living ordinary lives, neat, clean, going to work, coming back to their families, what kind of a world is this?

We got off the train and started walking. We walked in a row down the street, about three-thousand people. It seemed like the people on the street, didn’t think it was weird that people with rags are walking there. No one stared at us, no one stopped to ask what is this? They treated this as a normal show. We saw people with wagons filled with their belongings,

the war was getting closer to that area. People felt the war was getting near, and they took a horse with a cart and started walking east, towards Russia, probably.

We felt a little vindictive when we saw that.

22.

We walked for hours until we reached a big city named: Thorn. This was a big city in Poland. We crossed the city, and arrived to a big forest, inside there was an area with no trees, there was one water pump and around it some round booths like Indian tabernacles, made out of plywood, and on the land itself, there was straw and sawdust. That was the place where they housed us. They placed six of us in each of those cabins and we had to lay down, very crowded with our legs towards the center. We didn’t mind.

The next day we were awaken early, given shovels and hoes and we were commanded to dig trenches, bunkers and pits for the German soldiers. They thought that the Russians might arrive so they prepared the fortification line. One meter-eighty debt, and eighty centimeters wide trenches. We had to spread out the dirt we took out, so it won’t show that there are bunkers there. It was high from the outside and becoming low as it goes inside. We had to smooth it and straiten it nicely. After we finished digging the trenches, they (the Germans) cut off the trees and we had to drag the heavy branches a few kilometers all the way to the trench. Near the digging, they carved the branches into thinner pieces, and placed them in the side walls of the dig, horizontally and vertically in order to strengthen the wall so they won’t collapse. They kept rushing us and shouting: “Quickly, quickly! Take bigger trees!”. They whipped us gladly, beat us heavily, and did not spare any punishments at every step, with no reason.

Every morning, we got up from the straw layer very early, received a piece of bread and margarine like in Auschwitz and something like dark coffee and then we were led to the digging area. We worked very hard from morning to evening, there were no drinking water nor food of course. We

were city girls and not accustomed to work with shovel and hoe, our hands filled with blisters, our skin torn, our whole body ached but we were not permitted to stop working, rest was forbidden. The guards and the S.S. men who were mainly Littvaks, from Lithuania, cruel bad men, stood there screaming: “Los! Los! Los”, and always looked for reasons to hit us. In the evening when we returned exhausted and aching from the hard work, we got soup, this time it had some potatoes and vegetables, it was soup and not straw taste.

Despite the hard work, the beating and the hunger, I managed to enjoy a little. It was spring, and the leaves turned from green to yellow/brown, the forest was pretty, on the ground, leaves that dropped from the trees were piling up and created a nice and soft rug. In the morning, the air was cool but during the day the nice sun warmed us, it wasn’t too hot nor freezing.

Near the area we were digging at, there were agricultural lands. People grew vegetables there. but they left the area or were forced to leave and left what was growing there: carrots, kohlrabi, pumpkin, so, on our way back we picked some of these vegetables and put them under our coats, the S.S. men didn’t say anything and let us take vegetables.

I cleaned the vegetables, sliced it and put it on bread. This was an addition to the food we received, and also some vitamins which our bodies lacked so much. We stole food all the time. They brought a wagon with potatoes, and I stuffed my coat with potatoes, they were filled with mud but who cared? I sliced it and that is how we ate it. It was art to prepare food in those conditions, to make some order in the food issue.

One day, after winter already took control and the soil was freezing, there were no more vegetables in the agricultural plots. My sister sneaked into the S.S. bunker, and stole vegetables. It was super dangerous, I don’t know where she got the courage to do that, the girl that did that after her, was caught and beaten to death.

Some asked us for the knife, but I was afraid to give it so it won’t disappear. I gave just to those who were very close. We were a group of five young women: My two sisters and I, a friend of my sister from the

factory, and a young women named Maria, who was a lawyer’s daughter, intelligent girl, who knew the German language very well.

Spring went by and winter arrived with it’s cold and rain, thick rain, like lead. We kept working in the rain and cold, we went to work wet, to the sap of our bones, and returned in the evening soaking water. There was no heater we could stand near in order to dry up, no clothes to replace our wet cloths, we were wet from our feet to our heads with mud, sticking to us everywhere, the straw layer was wet and muddy and we had no choice but to lay on the wet straw, crowded together so much, that we dried up during the night from our own body heat, and started the morning dry.

The temperatures dropped under zero, the cold was awful and even the straw froze. The only faucet we had in the site froze, and we could not wash, we got filled with lice, the lice passed from one to the other, and we scratched till bleeding. Our bodies were filled with sores, there were no medicine nor creams. Once they brought a vehicle and we had to take off all our clothes and remain naked in the cold, then, they took the clothes to the car, and disinfected them, but it did not help. Our bodies were full of lice.

Our physical condition worsened, and that is when Typhus ‘arrived’. People started getting sick with Typhus, and, the diarrhea was everywhere inside our booths. It was impossible to leave at night because of the snow and frost. Outside there was a pit with a board on top and that is where we defecated. There was no paper, no basic hygiene, conditions and at night, there was the risk of falling in the dark, so people just stayed lying down, doing their body wastes where they were. Hell came down to earth, our hands and legs started to freeze, people screamed out of pain, excruciating pain, frozen leg, frozen hand, people froze to death, or died from Typhus and the remaining people had to go to work.

People died and we kept working.

One day I also got sick with Typhus. Suddenly I started defecating. At the beginning I could still work, at night I defecated continuously. The women around me heard and asked: “Who is this? Who this time?” “One of the three Budapest sisters” came the answer. That is how we were known, no

one knew names. Everyone was busy with his own problems, we didn’t ask, nor showed interest in each other, we were busy trying to live, to stay alive. People were very sorry when I got Typhus, since we were very gentle and delicate, we didn’t get in any arguments with no one.

Everyone knew what fate awaits those who got sick with Typhus, these are the unhuman conditions we lived in.

Then, I could not continue working. One day I couldn’t walk any more, the defecating and weakness has defeated me. I could not go to work. People who could not work, had to face the captain who lived in a house inside the woods, and explain to him why she cannot work. No evading – one’s duties – was allowed. Everybody was sick, who wasn’t? But anyone who stayed ‘home’ – if this could be called home with straw on the floor – had to receive a permit.

I stood in line with the other sick people who could no longer stand and work. I was miserable, sick, with no strength, wearing rags on my head, torn from a blanket, rags on my legs, I didn’t see myself but I am sure I looked terrible. The captain stood there, all contented with his dog at his feet, his entertainment little dog. The ‘blockeltasta’ asked: “Why didn’t you go to work?” I didn’t know German and what I did learn, I already forgot but I said: “I’m ‘krank’, – I’m ill”. He shouted at me: “What is the meaning of ‘krank’? what’s happening with you?” I didn’t even answer him yet when the ‘blockeltasta’ slapped me on the face a very strong slap! “Go” she shouted. She didn’t want him to stay too long. She knew I was sick. Everyone knew we were sick and unable to walk. She was a Polish Jew, and was helping him.

From her slap, I fell to the ground. The dog saw me fall, maybe he got scared but he jumped on me. Watching his dog jump on me, the captain started laughing a crazy laugh, as if he just heard a good joke. He laughed, and laughed, I cannot forget his laughter. A cruel laughter, disgusting, with no humanity in it. As if he said to himself: ‘this bug, this one looks like a cockroach, what is she afraid of death for?’ He didn’t think a person wants to live in any cost, who knows what kind of garbage he came from and all of a sudden, he got power, he was the captain of the entire camp. At that

stage he just turned his back on me, and walked back to his house still laughing, I tried to collect the remaining of my energy, got up and very, very, slowly dragged myself to what we called ‘home’.

Most of the people were dying from diseases, from Typhus, from the cold. People froze, the awful injuries people suffered from the cold, gave them excruciating pain. People screamed unhuman screams from the pain, I can’t describe the pain intensity. I was taken into a block which was indicated for the terminal-ill. My sisters cried terribly and didn’t eat from worry and sorrow. I was lying there in the terminal-ill block, I didn’t suffer pain, just defecation all the time, I could not stand up. I defecated inside the long underwear I was wearing, the ‘gatkes’, it froze and that is how I remained, I have no idea how long I was there. One day, I was only told later, my sisters came to visit me and found me unconscious, I don’t know how long I was unconscious, suddenly I opened my eyes, looked up and saw my sisters standing and crying because they were sure that I was dead already. They were sure that in a short while, I will be thrown into the woods, just like they did to all the dead people.

We saw how the dead were left naked, because everyone wanted another piece of cloth. We saw the dead every time we went to look for branches, because sometimes, we could light a branch or two with matches stolen from the captain’s house. Two girls who were taken to work as seamstresses, took the matches and other small things from there, so we used these matches to light a small fire, we placed a tin on this fire, and cooked a few potatoes. That was a celebration.

I too, was about to die from Typhus, suddenly, in a miracle way, somehow, after I woke up from my unconsciousness, I passed the peak of the illness. It was probably written somewhere, that I needed to live. My sisters stood there crying and all of a sudden, I open my eyes and say: “I’m hungry”, if I had an appetite, it meant, I overcame the illness. They didn’t know what to bring me to eat, I couldn’t eat bread after so many days with no food, so my sisters gave their bread to the girls who worked for the captain, in exchange for some Semolina. I don’t know how they cooked it, but that was the first food I ate. I still couldn’t stand up but anyone who stayed there, (in the terminal-ill block) was thrown out as if they are already dead.

So, my sisters helped me, supported me, took me out of the terminal-ill block, and brought me back to the block I was in, before. In the morning, they held me again on both sides, and that is how they carried me to work, so I won’t stay in the block, because whoever remained there, was sentenced to death. I had miracles happen to me that I cannot explain. Under an excuse that they (the sisters) are going to bring the wood from the forest, they took me, leaned me against a stump of a trunk-tree and left me there. The temperature was minus 20 degrees, I had no power to move and only in a miraculously way, I didn’t freeze. That is what they did (the sisters) for a few days, until I got some strength back. I could not yet walk by myself, but I ate some soup and bread and slowly, I got my resources back.

22. (second 22 as in the Hebrew version)

At the end of January, 1945, we heard, the thunder of cannons, from afar. The Russians were getting closer, the S.S. men who guarded us said we need to leave and go to Germany. They stood us outside to check what is our condition, because anyone who was in bad condition, worse than anyone else, was left behind and shot. I was in a terrible shape but I smiled and I had nice teeth, so they didn’t leave me there. I was in a terrible condition, I hardly walked but my sisters supported me. We started walking. from behind us, we heard the shooting of the people who were left behind. We didn’t know where we are going, we walked to where they told us, we were not given any bread, nor drink, nothing. We were lucky that we took some bread and vegetables with us, whatever we had left.

In the evening, they placed us in a cowshed. The poor cows were mooing because they were not milked, since their owners ran away in fear from the Russians. The cow’s udders were full of milk. My sisters who never saw cows found a pot and started milking the cows with their dirty black hands. We drank this milk. It caused more defecating, but there was nothing to be done since we wanted to live. Everyone wants to live.

People fell on the way and could not go on. People who were too slow were shot and then the others started running like a flock, stumbled again

and could not walk again. No one had any strength. They probably thought we will all die on the way.

That’s how we walked for eight days. Every evening, we were placed in the cowshed and were guarded so we won’t run away. After eight days we arrived in a small village named Crona. There we were placed in the local prison, and they locked the doors on us. With heavy fatigue we lay on the floor. We were pleased that it was a closed place (not outside). Someone made soup out of flour that in Hungary, only cows ate – ‘corpa’, the thickest flour and the least human fit, but they made soup and gave us a plate with soup and it gave us new energy. We heard bombing all night and even the sealing above us got cracked a bit, and pieces fell on us but who moved? What do we care? We couldn’t move. In the morning, we saw the guards are not coming and we wondered among ourselves, what happened?

Not knowing what has happened, we heard the door open around 10 in the morning and we saw a Russian hat!

We were freed. That was on January, 29th, 1945.

We didn’t joy, we couldn’t grasp what is happening, we were in such poor condition, hungry, so weak, that we could not joy. None of us could be happy.

23.

The courageous among us peaked through the open door to see if the German guards are really gone. Only then, we dared to walk over the threshold. Not one German was there. White snow covered the ground, an armored vehicle and trucks filled with soldiers hurried on the road leaving mud marks on the snow. An officer was standing in the intersection directing the traffic. He had a long cape, long down to the floor in red and black colors, this vision looked like a painting.

A person can see beauty even alongside his suffering, and that is the picture I was left with in my head.

We went to a shelter to look for clothes, but there weren’t any, we found shoes in size 45, I was glad. What I had on my feet could no longer be called shoes. My feet suffered so much from the cold (up to this day I have a bone a little sticking out in both my legs and in both my hands). I padded the inside of the shoes with some rags, and felt warm. Hesitantly, with slow steps, we walked into the village to look for food. Every whisper made us look to the sides, worried that a German soldier, or a policeman, might appear suddenly from somewhere, and stop us. The shops were broken and abandoned, we went in and found doctors accessories: knifes and other medical stuff. This was an opportunity to replace the knife I had with a better one. As I was reaching out for the knife, my eye caught a movement. I turn my head and there he was, a Russian soldier was standing next to me with a knife pointed at me. I moved my hand from the knife I was about to take, so he will not think I am planning on hearting him. They did not know who we were, and how much we suffered. We suffered from the Russians as well, they looked like Mongolians, rough and wild, they were also tired and hungry. They did not help us, we had to manage on our own. So, we kept walking from house to house, to look for food. All the houses were empty, people fled. The residents of this village were Germans, that Hitler settled there, and they all ran away. We found out that the Russian soldiers preceded us, and raided these houses and took whatever they could, including food. We arrived at a house that its door was locked, we tried opening it but it wouldn’t open. Suddenly this Russian came, dressed nice, I showed him that we would like him to open the door for us, he leaned on the door, pushed it and opened it. At the entrance, there was a long corridor which ended in a room. The Russian signaled with his finger for me, to follow him, I thought that he found food or clothes, what could I think? What could I think, stupid me, I was stinking, sick, dirty, what could I think? Since I felt unhuman… I followed him. He signals me to come and I go. He opened the room’s door. It was a bedroom and a big bed was standing in the center of the room. I followed him in and he grabbed me and threw me on the bed, shutting the door with a kick. I didn’t know what to do, I was shaking, laying on the bed helplessly. The Russian was about to carry out his scheme on me, when right then the door opened, and my sister came in. The Russian got mad,

cursed and left. My sister shouted at me, upset about my carelessness. Fortunate for me, she saw the Russian entering the house and me walking behind him, so she walked after us and that is how I was saved. I was skin and bones, no breasts, dirty and stinking, with lice, I could not believe someone would want to look at me as a woman.

We found an empty apartment, and closed ourselves there, all six of us, and maybe a few more people. Outside there were horse corps, we took their meat and cooked and ate it. In the apartment we found hot water, and there we bathed for the first time in six months but we didn’t have other clothes, so we were forced to wear the same clothes. The clothes were full of lice, we shook them as much as we could, but lice remained both on the clothes and in our hair. I saw my sister’s, body. Her whole body was one big sore from the lice itching.

We crowded together in the kitchen, outside, in the street, there was still noises of shooting and screaming: “Barishnya, Barishnya” (that means young Women in Russian). We didn’t dare to light-up, so no one knows there is someone here and might come in…

After a few days, Russian officers arrived in town and put things in order, they didn’t let the soldiers touch us. That is also when the shooting stopped, and they stopped looking for “Barishnya”.

We were in town for a few days but found no food. All the houses were empty so, all six of us girls decided we have to leave this town, otherwise we will starve. We wanted to reach Warsaw. We started walking and Maria, who spoke German, asked people on our way which is the right way to Warsaw, and they showed us the general direction.

We walked and walked. I can’t remember what we ate on the way. We entered houses and yards, and stole whatever we could. One day, Maria and I, stood near a house and suddenly an airplane appeared in the sky, and people came out to see if it is a German airplane, or a Russian one, or an American airplane. We seized this moment that people were outside and we entered the house. Inside the house we found big buckets full of pork, we each took 2 pieces and put them inside our clothes and ran outside, and kept running so we won’t be caught.

The roads were full of wagons attached to horses. The wagons were full of packages and objects, and people. Many walked pushing hand wagons or holding their parcels in their hands. Everyone was running from the Russian invaders. That was our revenge. This is how we walked for days. We crossed rivers and bridges, we walked in the rain, in the cold in the snow. We walked during the day and, paused at night. Sometimes we entered an empty house and sometimes we were let into a cowshed or the storage place of the straw, to sleep in there. We slept very crowded with our legs up sometimes, but the most important thing was that we were free, we were free to decide our destiny.

After a few days, we arrived in Warsaw. House after house was burned, destroyed. There was not one building that didn’t have signs of some destruction, and there was not even one person on the street. We kept walking in the streets of the ruined city, jumping over stones and pits, which were opened on the roads, wondering and amazed about the destruction around us. It felt like we were living on a different planet, we knew nothing nor did we hear anything, about what was going on ‘out there’ outside the camp borders.

A long time passed until we saw a living soul. It was a man dressed with worn clothing. He said that on the east side of Warsaw, beyond the Vistula River, there is a neighborhood called Praga which did not get hurt in the bombing and there is life there. The bridge over the Vistula was broken but, we jumped over the broken stones of the bridge, and made it to the other side of the river, to Praga. There was a big house, where many partizans who came back from the forests, have gathered. We were among the first refugees who arrived from the camps to Warsaw, they didn’t hear about the camps there, nor about Auschwitz and the gas chambers. They didn’t hear about the crematoriums and not about all the torture Jews, had to endure. We told the people there everything we went through. They did not believe this. Who could believe things like that can occur?

The Jewish partizans arranged the place, and placed straw, so people can put their heads down. We received the first corner, and were given hot soup and we felt better. Slowly, more and more people arrived, and the place filled up. Once, my sisters and I, were standing in one of the corners

and saw Polish officers who looked high ranked, one of them stood near my sister Iren, who was a very beautiful, young women. He started asking her who she was, where did she come from, but we didn’t understand what he was saying. All of a sudden, his voice broke down and while crying he said: “Look what they did to the girls of Israel? What they did to the daughters of Israel?” He took out one thousand zloty and gave my sister. Oronka and I, stretched our hands out and said: ‘Schwester’ (meaning to say: we too belong, she’s our sister) but he kept crying and repeated: “Daughters of Israel, daughters of Israel”. Then, he put his hand in his pocket again, and gave each of us one thousand zloty. Today, when I remember that, I feel so moved, and tears fill my eyes, but back then, we were in a state of no feelings, we couldn’t get excited because we were blocked. We took the money and went to the market and bought bread and sausage. We waisted all the money on food, we didn’t even think about clothes, food was much more important so we bought, and bought until the money ran out. We knew we still had a long way to go.

24.

We wanted to live. When a person wants to live, nothing else matters, just to eat and eat, so we ate well and walked on, and reached Lublin. Lublin, was the first big city in Poland, that was released by the Red Army, even before Warsaw. That is why Lublin became a place where many Jews – who came out of their hiding places, out of the forests and camp survivors

– have gathered. They all assembled in ‘Fertshouse’. When we arrived in Lublin, we were directed to go to ‘Fertshouse’. In ‘Fertshouse’ the Jewish committee, took care of all the refugees that kept coming. They made a list of the names of people, incase, someone comes and asks about them. They took care of food and medical help, clothing and accommodation. Everything was organized there. There was even a group of Greeks there among the refugees, (back then I did not yet know, I would tie my life with a Greek), I wasn’t interested in them, I was not interested in anyone there, my sisters and I, also found it hard to talk with them, fortunate for us, Maria spoke German and it helped us. We didn’t even know Yiddish.

I didn’t like the Yiddish. We studied German in school and since my mother knew Yiddish, I would ask her sometimes to help me with a word here and there, and she would say the word in Yiddish because Yiddish is very similar to German, but not in every word. So, when I came to class and said the word the teacher said: what kind of word is this? This is not German. I was embarrassed.

In ‘Fertshouse’ I received my release paper with the date, February 27, 1945, marked on it. It was a month, after the Germans took us on the death march from Thorn.

We stayed in ‘Fertshouse’ a few days. The place filled up slowly, people came back, first the ones from the area, and then others. They too, didn’t know what ‘Lager’ (a military camp) is, we didn’t hear about Auschwitz there, we had nothing to do there, we wanted to go home, to go back to Budapest, to see if my mother, came back.

We started walking south. Sometimes, we got on a freight train, sometimes we walked. it was cold. It was a hard winter and we were still wearing rags. Sometimes we stopped for a short rest, but the will to get home, pushed us forwards.

One afternoon, we saw a sign directing to Mishkolts. (That’s how they pronounce the name of the city Miskolc). We were happy. We arrived in Slovakia where they spoke Hungarian. In the evening, we arrived in a small village, which I don’t remember its name. We picked the first house we saw in order to ask for a place to rest. We knocked on the door, a nice looking, tall guy, opened the door. He looked at us compassionately, “Come in, come in” he said, and invited us to sit at the table, he placed bread and butter and cheese, fruit jam and a drinking pitcher. We sat down swallowing the food with our eyes. The young man apologized that there is all he has to give at that time, since he came back not long ago from the forests where he hid as a partizan, and fought the Germans. “You see”, he said, “This entire village, all the land belongs to my family, but I came back and found out that no one was left”, he cried. We understood him, we told him what happened to us, he could not believe, there was such a

camp, as Auschwitz, he couldn’t believe there was a place, where people were tortured like this, and where people were burned.

How can one believe people would do such horrible things?

Since there was not enough room for all of us in the house, we split: my sisters and I, stayed at this man’s house, and the other two young women, stayed in a different house. The Guy offered us to clean up and lie in a clean bed with linen, which we didn’t see and feel for ages. I said: “We have lice, I don’t want to”. I felt uncomfortable. We stayed there two or three days. Since Auschwitz, my hair grew a little, I was blonde and I looked nice, my eyes were bright and my teeth were nice and the man liked me and asked me to stay, but I said I had to go home to see my mother and sisters, and to see who remained at home, and that is how we separated. I promised, I shall come back but I didn’t. Months later, when I was in training, I met a girl from his village and I asked her about him, she said he married a poor girl. He probably waited and waited and when I didn’t come back, he got married. I was shy, I didn’t feel comfortable, I thought that he just took pity on me. It’s all destiny. That’s what was written for me.

In Mishkolts, we boarded a train that took us to Budapest. The cars of the train were very crowded, we hardly found a place to sit. We didn’t talk much, each one of us was deep in her thoughts. The engine slowed down and the train stopped, the doors opened and a flow of people dropped out.

25.

It wasn’t even a year since we left, but both the city and us were very different. First, we went to the center of the city, to my sisters’ Margit’s home. With a pounding heart we knocked on her door. Margit, opened the door and as she saw us, her face turned white as if she saw a ghost. “Where is mother?” She asked. She knew we left with mother, we also asked where is mother: “Didn’t she return?”, “No one returned” she said. We entered her home. She only knew that Ibie stayed with her husband in the apartment, that burglars broke into her apartment and stole Margalit’s

suitcase that she left with Ibie, a suitcase with her valuables, so basically, she remained with nothing. So, we spread a blanket on the floor, there was not much room because it was a small apartment, one room, a hall and a bathroom. The situation was bad, it was a hard winter and we didn’t even throw-out our clothes at that stage, because we didn’t have replacement ones. First food. We heard that there is a place where they helped Jews, the ‘Joint center’. We went over there and started telling, about Auschwitz. They didn’t believe us at first, they said it is impossible, it can’t be. We said: “We were in Auschwitz” we told all the awful things we lived there. Slowly, came more survivors and they also talked about Auschwitz and the camps, and the ‘Joint’ people saw that what we told them, was true.

Eventually, we were accepted, and given clothes and only then, we took off the clothes we had on us, and threw them away, so we won’t bring lice into my sister’s home.

It was already the end of March. We were at Margalit’s house. The situation in Budapest was very hard, there was no food, many refugees in the streets. The Germans, were still 50 km from Budapest and we didn’t know if they would come back. The Russian soldiers, kept walking the streets looking for ‘Barishnya’, girls. We had to hide our faces with big kerchief, so the Russians won’t harass us.

One of these times we looked through the window to the street, in Margot’s flat. She had a big window facing ‘Margit Sziget’ (the island Margit) and we saw the Russians walking with cows and horses, (they took whatever they found on their way with them to Russia). We saw them stop near the house, because there was a long convoy of cars and we were trying to see what is going on there. All of a sudden, the soldiers noticed us, and started shouting: “Barishnya, Barishnya”, then, they started running to our building, slamming the main entrance with their fists, shouting at the porter to open the door. The guard told us to run to the roof on the fifth floor, while he stopped the Russian soldiers. We ran to the roof, feeling out of breath, and hid there. The porter opened the door just a crack, and the soldiers tried to burst in shouting “Where are the Barishnya?”, “There is no Barishnya here” replied the guard. “But we saw them” the soldiers insisted. Somehow, the guard/porter convinced them

that there are no ‘Barishnya’ in this building and they left. In our minds we almost saw our end, because we heard that they raped even invalid women.

Every day we asked ourselves what will we live from? We needed to live out of something, but there was no money. People walked in the street selling what they had. Margalit didn’t have anything left, everything was stolen from her. Only the apartment remained so, she shared with us what she had and it was very little. We received food stamps from the ‘Joint’ organization, but that also was not enough. We went a few times to the villages to exchange products. I went with her (with Margit), a few times out of the city to bring food, to get some rice, flower and other things but that too was ending…

The winter has made place for spring to arrive, and then I had an idea: Near Margalit’s home there was an open market, we decided we will buy food products in the villages and sell them in this market, in the city. We arranged our things in one of the corners, we placed a kind of mat on the ground, rented a weight scale and started selling. I have a sense for business and I looked around, to see what this market doesn’t have, and that is what we bought. We sold well, we had a nice profit, we bought small quantities of nice cherries, and we told people that we have a house and land in Buda, and that is where the cherries grow. People were very happy to buy cherries from our garden, and that is how we maintained ourselves.

In the meantime, Rozi, came back from the village, the place where she hid with her children, during the war. Her husband had a house in the suburbs with three apartments. In one of them they lived, and they offered us to come live in the other apartment. They offered because, there was a lack of apartments and people just invaded any apartment they could find empty so, if we were there, it was less bound to happen. Also, they wanted to help Margit, get her apartment back to herself. She was a seamstress and she needed the space to receive her customers, in private. She also had a boyfriend who could not come, as long as we occupied the flat. So,

we moved to live in Rozi’s apartment, which had two little rooms and a kitchen.

One day my young brother, Latsi, came back from Mauthausen, and joined us in the apartment. A few days later my brother Josef, arrived as well. Josef did have a big house of his own and his Cristian neighbors kept it safe, but my brother did not want to go back to his apartment, where he had a good life with his wife and little girl.

We didn’t speak after the war, we didn’t speak. We were together and it was good, only Yoshke spoke. He was in a camp called ‘Bor’ in Serbia, that was the worst camp. Almost no survivors from there. When the Russians got close, the Germans took all the remaining Jews by truck, and started heading towards Germany. My brother was also on that truck. He was in such bad shape that he fainted. The Germans threw all the dead out, and made a pile of their bodies. Since my brother fainted, they thought he is also dead and threw him out together with all the others. He describes a small mountain of dead people. After a while, he doesn’t know how long, he heard voices talking not in German, he lifted his hand. “I don’t know how I even managed to lift my hand; I don’t even remember I did that”, he told us.

These were the Americans. They saw a mountain of bodies and suddenly a hand lifted, and they understood that inside this small mountain there is a living person, so they extracted him out and took him to the hospital, that is how his life was rescued. His wife and daughter arrived with us to Birkenau and were sent with my mother to the gas chambers. His sister’s wife as well. They all disappeared, and we thought that we shall meet again, but the ‘shtoboba’ who were the helpers of the ‘blockoba’ told us: “You see these chimneys, that is where your parents were burned, and you will also be burned there, you will die”. We were too naïve, and we did not believe them. Still, we said that it is better that mother is not with us, maybe she died in an easier way…

26.

We were five people in the apartment. My sister Iren, decided to try her luck in the factory she used to work in, before the war. They welcomed her with open arms. Ari (Arinka) also went to the factory, and she was also welcomed happily. I stayed home to cook, clean, wash the laundry, someone had to replace mother.

One of these days, I was walking with my sisters on the street, and we heard music and saw a group of young men and women dancing. I asked what is this and was told that this is a group from ‘Hachshara’. We entered and I immediately became enthusiastic of the young happy people. “What are you doing” I asked. “We are going to Israel” they replied.

I was not religious but I saw an opportunity to leave Hungary, I hated Hungary, I could not forgive or let go of what happened. I didn’t see any future in Hungary. Each one of my siblings found his place, and I said to myself: ‘My years are passing-by, how long will I stay in this roll of ‘fill in for mother’? Should I try my luck in the factory? Is this a future for me? What shall I do? Shall I go back to what I did before? This is not a future’. The boyfriend I had before, got married when I was in the camps, I met with him and he said he cried so much, and it was very hard for him. His family kept telling him he needs to get married, because I will not return, also, his family did not want a Jew, so he got married. I didn’t have any more feelings for him, he wanted to meet, but I said I don’t meet with married people, so this connection also ended.

I felt I had an opportunity now to see the world, to see a different life, to start a different life, so I got excited and registered to the ‘Hachshara’ (A movement to prepare and bring young Jews to ‘Eretz Israel’ after WWII).

I said to my family: “I am going to Israel”.

I had to take care of myself. I had no job, I didn’t want to go work in the factory, I had nothing to do, I hated this place but if my mother was there, I wouldn’t leave, who is there for me, to wait for? “We will look for someone for you, you will get married” my brother said. “No”, I replied, “I don’t want to get married here, I hate this place, there is no place for

me here”. My sisters, Iren and Ari, tried to make me change my mind, they were very upset with me, and said: “We were together all that time, and now you are leaving?” I replied that this has nothing to do with anything, that we were together in the suffering, but now each one of us needs to build their own lives, and I am not staying in this country.

They had a job, they earned nicely and got back to normal life, I needed to take care of my future. ‘What am I doing here? to stay here to serve my siblings?’ with all the respect to my siblings, I didn’t know what will happen, and I did know how to do everything: to cook, to clean, ‘I will find a job and manage ok’, I thought.

At the beginning, I went to ‘Hachshara’ just in the evenings. I wanted to stay home and only come to the activities, and they agreed. I took part in the play we raised and in other social activities, and then in one of February days in 1946, they said that I should come with my belongings, that I should be in the ‘Hachshara’ camp, because we can be called any day now, to start our journey to Israel. I took a ‘Ryukzak’ (a back-pack), put my few belongings in it: two pairs of underwear, a few more items we received from the ‘Joint’ and two dresses. One of these dresses was very pretty with big flowers, elegant dress that my sister Margalit gave me, I didn’t have any money at all. My siblings didn’t really think I wanted to leave, but even if they gave me a few pennies, I would have nothing to do with the money. So, I entered the ‘Hachshara’.

After a few days, a truck arrived one evening, and we all got on it without asking anything. A person who was saved from death, doesn’t care anymore about anything. We trusted the counselors and the emissaries (from Israel), to take care of us. They closed the truck with canvas, told us to be quiet, not to talk so no one hears anything, and we were disciplined, and didn’t make a sound. We drove for a few hours in Romanian territory, and arrived to Bucharest. They told us to throw out all our papers and photos, so if we get caught, no one will know who we are and what we are. We did exactly as we were told.

In Bucharest they took us to a big house, gave us 60 pennies for living but of-course, it was impossible to live with this amount, if you bought a piece

of bread, you already finished all the money. We arranged and I suggested, that we form a join cash box, and they will buy the groceries, and I will cook soup so everybody can have good food, and that is what we did. We were forbidden to wonder the streets too much so no one will suspect us, we had no papers nor spoke the language. After a month in Bucharest the people in charge of the ‘Hachshara’, came to choose who will go on the ship and I, was one of the lucky ones. They took us to ‘Constanta port’, and let us wait for a few days in a house, probably until the vessel will be ready, on May 7^th, we embarked on the ship named ‘Max Nordau’ which was the last vessel leaving ‘Constanta port’ to Israel.

‘Max Nordau’ ship bringing ‘Maapilim’, 1946

27.

It wasn’t a vessel it was more like a boat. Lines of wooden boards were placed with only 60 cm height, so people can crawl in and lay down. It was impossible to sit and, of-course, not to stand up, so as many people as possible can get in. We were compressed like sardines, in the lower level of the ship. At that time, I still didn’t know how to swim, we didn’t think what will happen if we were caught. After coming from a concentration camp, nothing really frightens you. You can endure anything, and since they didn’t let us go up to the upper part of the vessel, we stayed down and laughed a lot.

We arrived to Haifa after eight days of sailing during which, we were given salty cheese (that was the first time I ever ate salty cheese), and bread, we lived on that. While still at sea, about a hundred kilometers from the shore, British battleships started escorting us, and so, escorted by Battleships, the ‘Max Nordau’ entered Haifa port.

We got of the ship and saw these people waiting for us on the beach with oranges. That was something… Up to this day I am so moved to tears, when I recall this. That was the first time we ate oranges. The people of the Kibbutzim, came and welcomed us with oranges. After all the bad we had, that exited us so much to be welcomed like this, with open arms. We were moved to tears, we cried so much, this was a big thing: Oranges. We never saw an orange before. In Hungary you could not buy oranges, it was too expensive, and so, we ate and ate.

A closed truck brought us to Atlit. We got down from the truck and were placed in a detention-center. We were accommodated in sheds: women apart from men. It was eve of the holiday ‘Shavuot’ and someone, prepared mayonnaise salad, that was the first time I ate mayonnaise salad. In general, it felt like a convalescent home, there. We got food as much as we wanted, all good things, the Kibbutzim prepared the food, private people brought food and if there is food – it’s all good.

I was in Atlit five weeks. During the day, we were allowed to be with the men and at night – apart. I didn’t care, I was cold, lost my faith, lost my femininity, I didn’t have a religion and wasn’t a woman, my inner

humanity was destroyed, all I wanted is to stuff myself with food just to eat.

Three weeks after I arrived in Atlit, another ship arrived. People talked about the ship of the ‘Greks’ (Edit’s word). They came with guitars and made everything lively. They knew how to sing, we danced together and although I looked nice and was in demand, I didn’t accept anyone until I saw one guy, tall, and I said in my heart: ‘This guy looks like a good person, serious, and good’ (afterwards, I learned that he thought the same of me) but, I didn’t do anything about it. The guy tried to make conversation with me but it was hard. I didn’t know Greek and he didn’t speak Hungarian, we both knew only a few words in German.

I registered to the Kibbutz, I had nowhere else to go. I didn’t have a family here so I registered to Kibbutz Tel Yosef. Others who had a family, were dismissed earlier.

One day the Greek guy came to me, the tall one that I knew that his name was Eliezer, and he asked me:” Where are you going?”

“To the Kibbutz”, I said.

“You want me to come?” He asked.

“If you want to come, I don’t care, come” I replied.

What else can you say to a stranger? “Do what you want” I said, and our ways parted.

He went to the city and I went to the kibbutz. We were a group of Hungarians with no relatives that we knew of in the land, so, we had nowhere to go and we registered to the kibbutz. We didn’t really know what a kibbutz is, but it was a place we could live in. The older members of the kibbutz and the ‘Sabras’ (Jews who were born in ‘Eretz Israel’) welcomed us with hostility. They looked down on the new comers, we were ‘Diaspora kind’ they did not want to hear our foreign languages, “Only Hebrew! Only Hebrew!” they pushed us but we didn’t know one word in Hebrew. They didn’t get close to us, nor did they want to connect with us so, we connected only among ourselves. However, for me personally, it was good in the kibbutz. The kibbutz members respected me, because I was the only woman who agreed to work in agriculture and

for them working the soil, was a symbol of the ‘New Jew’ who is not ghetto-like.

I was assigned to work in the garden. I was given a sack which I tied, on my waist. My job was to plant flower seedlings, to cut off the flower buds and to take out potatoes and carrots from the ground. The vegetable garden, was far from the kibbutz houses, I worked and sang. I worked hard but didn’t complain. I had a job, clothes to wear and food to eat and it was enough for me. I used my Lunch break, to learn how to swim in the Kibbutz’s pool, I got some tan and looked really nice. Most of the time we wore short pants and a shirt and I looked very attractive, I had success but I didn’t use it, I didn’t want to tie myself to anyone.

One day when I came back from work, friends came to me and said: “The Greek guy, the tall one, the dark one, came to visit you”. I almost forgot who they were talking about. We just spoke a few words to each other and that was in another place, in another world. He came and brought sweets he was well dressed. City guy, looking good. Eliezer doesn’t forget, up to this day, that in that evening I was dressed in a shirt and shorts, and he loved it. He stayed for two or three days and gave me the address in Tel Aviv. “When you get a chance” he said, “arrange it and come, I want you to come, Goodbye”, he said, and left.

A few days after ‘Black Saturday’, so happened that I could go to the city with someone from the kibbutz. I said to myself: ‘I will go and see what is this city’. (‘Black Saturday’, June 29th 1946, was a day that the British authorities held a large operation, arresting many Jewish community leaders in the land of Israel, which was not yet Independent).

It was good for me in Tel Yosef – I had plenty of food and that was the only thing I was interested in. After the camp: food, food, food, but I felt I wanted to try something else. Ever since I came to this land, I was only in the kibbutz. I took my backpack and the people I was with, dropped me off exactly at the address Eliezer gave me. This was just before the old central bus station, in Tel Aviv. I saw a simple house and many people and suddenly I remembered them from Atlit, so I asked them: “Where is Eliezer, Chico Eliezer?” One guy said to me: “Sit and wait, I will go call

him, he is in the Cafe”. (There was a Cafe where all the Greeks assembled) he went and brought, Eliezer.

Eliezer was very happy to see me, I was also happy to see him. I told him I needed a place to sleep. At that moment I wasn’t thinking of tomorrow or what will be or how will I manage, I wasn’t worried about work. I said in my heart that I can do any work, even as a home maid, I can start building a NEW LIFE.

Edit & Eliezer

1.

EDIT: Eliezer said to me: “Don’t worry”. He took my backpack – which had all my belongings on this earth – from my hand, held my hand and started walking, “I will bring you to my cousin and there you can stay” he said. After a short walk, we arrived at Lucha’s home – Eliezer’s cousin. The door opened, and I was welcomed by a nice lady and a small child who hid behind her dress. Eliezer spoke ‘Spaniolit’ with her (the Jewish Spanish). I understood he is explaining to her who I am. The woman turned to me and smiled and with a wide hand movement, invited me in. I could only smile back and nod my head as a thank you. A language barrier stood between us I could not talk to her. They spoke only ‘Spaniolit’ and Hebrew, and I knew only Hungarian, and a few words in German. To overcome the embarrassment, I started to play with the little girl who responded immediately, and came out from behind her mother’s dress. One can play with children even without knowing the language. Lucha set the table and made up a bed for me and by different gestures, showed me I am a wanted guest in her house. I was very grateful and thanked her with body language and hand motions. In my heart, I said to myself, that this is a temporary solution, I want a place of my own and not to lean on others. The inability to connect with the people in the house, added to the feeling of alienation. I was determined to open an independent life, and to start drawing my way.

I stayed with Aunt Lucha a few days. One of these days I met a woman speaking Hungarian, who lived in the opposite apartment with her son. I told her I just arrived to Tel Aviv, and I am looking for a place and a job. The woman offered me a place in her apartment together with her and with her son. Her offer sounded as a good solution for me, at least I will have someone to talk to. I told Eliezer I am moving to live with the Hungarian, not because it was bad for me at his cousins’, but because I

could chat a bit with the Hungarian woman, and feel less lonely. I explained to him, that I would like to have my own apartment.

ELIEZER: In those days in Tel Aviv, there was a lack of places to live in. The ‘Sochnut’ (the Jewish agency) paid us, the Greek guys, an amount of money, which was equal to a days’ work if we found vacant apartments or rooms. So, when Edit said she wants an apartment, I took my friends to look for unoccupied apartments. On the roof of a building on Rothschild St., on the corner of Bezalel Yafe St., we found three vacant rooms. This building roof was divided into three parts. Each part had a laundry room and a room for the water tank – almost a perfect place to reside in. We ‘invaded’ the rooms and I called Edit immediately, to come and choose which room she wants to live in.

EDIT: On Saturday, Eliezer came and said: “Come, I found an apartment”. We arrived at Rothschild St. in the corner of Bezalel Yafe St., and climbed the stairs to the roof of the building. Three rooms “waited there” for tenants. The front room was big but, did not have any tiles on the floor, only cement. In the middle, facing north, was a smaller room but paved. The third room was small. I chose the middle room which had a big balcony with beautiful view, and clear air. On the same day, I moved the few things I owned, to my new room on the roof of this building on Rothschild St., I was very happy, I had my own roof over my head. On the very next day, tenants occupied the other two rooms as well.

Now, that the apartment issue was solved, I had to find work. The Hungarian woman that I lived in her place a few days, asked me what can I do and what would I like to do for work. I told her I can mend stockings. “Great” said the lady, “Not far from here, on Florentine St., there is a shop where they mend stockings”. The woman wrote down the name and address for me, and I went to try my luck. The owners of the place were a nice elderly couple, and again, I gathered the few words I knew in German, told them I was looking for work and that before the war, I was working in mending stockings. I asked them if they needed a worker. To

my relief, they said yes, and that they will be happy to employ me. We agreed we will share the profit from the stocking mending, half for them and half for me and immediately, I started working.

Every day, I walked from my flat on Rothschild St., to the shop on Florentine St., I worked from 8:00 am until the evening. I’m a fast worker so my output was big, they were satisfied and so was I. I earned well, 9 liras a week. Every week, when I received my money, I went and bought another pan, plates, cups, glasses, towels – everything needed to make my room a home. Near my room was a laundry room with a big water tank, I placed a board on it and on that we placed the Primus (Stove), and that is where I cooked.

ELIEZER: After a very short time, Edit and I decided to get married. Life was hard but we didn’t feel the difficulty. Edit made 9 liras a week and I made barely 5 or 6 liras. We worked as carriers (portage) where ever we were wanted. I took advantage of every opportunity. When we worked in the port, and broken boxes arrived, we would take its content, and sell it. No one lost from that and we earned a few more liras. Edit was used to the fact that I bring home things. If I came empty handed, she would ask surprised: “Didn’t you bring anything?”.

Those were the days of fighting the British. The whole Jewish community in the land was working towards the purpose of driving the British out of the country. At the forefront of the struggle, there were 3 army organizations: the ‘Hagana’, the ‘Etsel’ and the ‘Lechi’. The Hagana organization was more moderate in its approach, while the ‘Etsel’ and the ‘Lechi’ were more extreme. One day, the members of the ‘Etsel’ have set on fire one of the shops on Levinski St., because the owners of the store would not collaborate with them. By chance, I was in the area with a friend so we entered the store and took some rolls of fabric. I said to my friend that if we don’t take it – others will, so it is better that we take. I brought the rolls of fabric to the apartment on the roof of Rothschild Blvd., and Edit made clothes out of them. The other rolls, I sold.

One of the Fridays, I stood with my friends in the corner of Levinski and Kishon streets. Suddenly, some guys came up to us and asked us if we are willing to work for good profit. What a question? Of-course we were willing. They took us by car, and brought us to the garage of ‘Dan’ company (busses) on Petach-Tikva Road. We stood and waited when suddenly, a vehicle entered and on it was an enormous box, like a shipping container. On it was a sign saying ‘Tractor’. We looked at each other and thought: ‘How will this container get off?’ We opened the container and there it was – not a tractor, but an armored vehicle on chains. We had a car with a towing cable, we fixed a ramp from the car which had the armored vehicles on it and slowly we got these armored vehicles down, using the towing cable. On that same evening, we managed to get off 13 of these armored vehicles, until the English found out and stopped the shipment.

EDIT: As Eliezer was struggling for every day of work, I continued my work of amending stockings and also did a little weaving, until I found out I was pregnant. During the entire pregnancy I suffered from laryngitis and took antibiotics as the doctor ordered. I didn’t know it’s bad to take medicine during pregnancy. I was alone, didn’t know the language and there was no one to warn me.

On September 14th, 1947, on the evening of ‘Rosh Hashana’, and after three days that I was suffering a lot of pain, I gave birth to a beautiful sweet baby. We called her Lea, named after Eliezer’s mother and in affection, we called her: Lelik. We had a small camera, and I didn’t stop taking pictures of this wonder we had born. She didn’t stop crying and I thought that is normal for babies. I nursed her with enjoyment and took a lot of pleasure holding her in my arms.

I was not the only one that was impressed by her, the neighbors in the room next to mine also fell in love with the baby, and wanted to hold her all the time, play with her and make her smile. I sowed her clothes with a sowing machine Eliezer brought me, just like I sowed my clothes, so when I went out to the street with her, people would stop me to express their

impression of this cute baby dressed with such beautiful clothes. We were happy, a little happy family.

ELIEZER: Two months after Lea was born, the UN announced the establishment of the state of Israel. Rothschild Blvd., was full of many people who came out to dance and party. We were among them. Edit and I, were very happy that we will have a sovereign state. We, that suffered so much, will finally have our own country. A day after the state was announced (In Tel-Aviv, By Ben Gurion, 7 months after the UN announcement), a war broke out. ‘Every guy and good men to the weapon’, (called the announcement), were enlisted to the army. My friend Baruch, who was a partner in a group of transporters which had a crane, registered me as a member of this group and that is how we were enlisted to the army, as a group, to work with the crane. We were six men, we worked in twelve hours shifts: three worked during the day and three during the night. We unloaded the ‘Messerschmitt’s – the airplanes that came from Czechia, they were filled with weapons and ammunition for the young Israeli army. We worked in ‘Sde-Dov” (former Tel Aviv small airport), day and night. One of these times, when we were busy unloading the cargo, a siren went off, Egyptian spitfires were attacking Sde-Dov airport, where we were. We left everything and ran for cover. After a few hours, when the battle ended, we saw how much damage had occurred to the airport and the airplanes that were parking there. There were also dead and wounded people, but our forces have managed to shoot down one of the Egyptian airplanes.

Since we worked shifts, I had time to look for another job. The Arabs who lived in Jaffa, in Lod, and in Ramla, left their houses and ran away. They believed what their leaders said, that they could come back to their homes shortly, also, they were promised to be given the houses of the Jews and that the Arab countries’, armies, will conquer the country and the Jews, will run away, but that is not what happened. The Jews, conquered the cities Lod, and Ramla, and the Arabs who left their houses in Jaffa, did not come back so we would go to the abandoned houses, fill sacks with

possessions and sell it. That is how I made 200 liras, an amount that was sufficient to join-in as a partner, in the group of transporters with the crane.

EDIT: The war did not skip Tel Aviv. Alarms shattered the air and Egyptian army airplanes, flew over the city and bombed it, I had to Run with the child in my arms to find shelter from that. Finally, the war ended and we entered a life of routine. Eliezer and three other friends, have founded a carriage company, and I, managed the house and took care of Lea. When Lea was a year and a half old, I noticed she isn’t developing like other children her age. I noticed that other children her age, are walking already, she was not even standing-up yet. She was short for her age, and cried a lot. I didn’t know the language well – I learned Hebrew from the street – a word here and there, so therefore had no one to consult about her. When she was two years old, I took her to a pediatrician, a well- known professor, and explained to him with a few words in German, that the child is developing late. He looked at her, smiled and said: “Beautiful girl, healthy like iron, she is just lazy, “A little lazy”. The Doctor said that, and I thought to myself, ‘Who am I to undermine his words? We probably need patience’.

ELIEZER: The Independence war was over, the state of Israel was founded, with that came bureaucracy.

The owner in our apartment in Rothschild Blvd. demanded rent, so we paid him 2.5 Lira’s per month, and then the city municipality asked us to evacuate. It was customary in those days that in order for us to leave the apartment, the municipality had to pay us big sums of money. There was for example one couple that received a different apartment in return for his agreement to evacuate. Edit pushed for us to leave the apartment, both because in our unit there was no bathroom and we had to share with the neighbors, and this was very uncomfortable, and also, because Edit did not get along with the neighbors. They loved Lea and use to come a lot, hold her, feed her and play with her but Edit got upset and said that they are interrupting the child’s routine. The child needs a routine, when to eat,

when to sleep and so there were all these disagreements all the time, between her and the neighbors, so, we just gave up the apartment and looked for a different place.

EDIT: We found a room in a deserted house in Jaffa, in a small street on the corner of Rothschild Blvd. We build a small shed as an addition to the room, a kitchen and a shower. Steep wooden stairs led to the apartment and everyone said the apartment looked like a ship – you go in and there is everything in small, but still, there is everything. In the meantime, I got pregnant again, and on March 9th 1951, Shoshi was born. A cute blonde baby with large eyes.

I thought that Lea should go to kindergarten, be with other children and not be at home all the time with me, especially now, when there was another baby. Lea went but did not fit-in over there. She was isolated, the teacher said the child is not suitable for kindergarten. That was the first blow. I found a woman who took care of three or four children at her home, and asked her to add Lea as well. This was a small group of children and the woman had a big yard with dogs, so, I believed Lea can fit-in there. Lea never said she doesn’t want to go, but she cried all the time. She didn’t play with the other kids, didn’t like to draw, didn’t play with dolls, didn’t have fun with the dogs, just sat and cried. In our home, it was also hard with her. She did like to listen to Greek music but she flinched around people, was scared of them. Eliezer had a friend at work, and he came to visit us and smiled at her calling her: “Lea’le, Lea’le” and she started crying. I said to her: “This is uncle David, why are you crying?” But nothing helped.

When Lea turned 5, I enrolled her into a municipal kindergarten, like any other child, but after a few months the teacher called me to say, the child does not fit-in there. She suggested to move her to a different kindergarten where there are fewer children, maybe she will do better there, she thought. So, I took her out of the municipal kindergarten, and took her to a different one in the city. It was very difficult, twice a day to get dressed,

ride the bus to her school, and then back from her school, and all that with Shoshi as a baby in the stroller.

ELIEZER: I was not aware of Edit’s hardship. She didn’t share that with me. She coped by herself. I was working very hard, left the house very early every morning, and came back very late at night, dirty and hungry. There was always a tidy home, and warm food, waiting for me.

David, Baruch, Yitzhak and I, founded the ‘Hamerim Group’ (the lifting group) and engaged in carriage. Not simple carriage of homes, but rather very complicated carriage, which needed expertise. From the beginning, there were old cranes that hardly lifted five ton, but with these cranes we moved anything we were asked to move. We found a solution to every problem, for example, when the company ‘Mekorot’ (the states’ water company) wanted to use pipes that EPC company (English petrol company), left behind as reserves for the Iraq-Haifa petrol line, they used us. This petrol line had stopped its activity after the Independence war, so stacks of steel pipes were left in the company site in Haifa. These were 12 Inch diameter pipes, and Pipes with no stitch, very expensive and very heavy, each one weigh six ton, and we still found a solution. We had an automobile with a towing cable, we connected hard good wooden boards to the car and on-top of them, we placed the pipes and this way we rolled the pipes slowly, until we brought them to their place. Later, arrived a German company with good cranes, and they assembled the lines of ‘Mekorot’, to Eilat. Months, we worked on moving these pipes, and in all these months, I was not at home during the week. I arrived only in the weekends. Our group name became widely known, and we were considered as a professional reliable group. All the big important organizations and institutions in the country, used the transportation services of our group: ‘Hamerim’, which was perceived the best group of heavy carriage in the country. We transported two machines to clean bottles from Haifa, to ‘Yafora’ factory in Rechovot, each machine weigh 20 ton. We also transported equipment and machines to a Beer factory, we transported machines to sweeten the water in Eilat (desalinate), machines for shredding gravel, and a piano to Ben-Gurion’s home in Tel-Aviv. I,

together with my partners, invested all the time, and energy in work. Edit did not load on me any problems she dealt with. I would arrive home at the weekend, change my clothes, rest, play with the girls and in the evening, we would go out to party. We had a Hungarian babysitter, who watched over the girls, and we went out to have fun. Edit and I, like to dance very much, so we went to dance in clubs, especially ‘Ariana’ club, which was the famous club in Tel Aviv. In those days, a young anonymous singer arrived, 16 years old, and he became a star, overnight. That was, Aris San, who drove the whole country crazy with his Greek music and his ‘Buzuki’ playing. To this ‘Ariana’ club, all the Greek, loving music people, came – my Greek friends from ‘Haviva Reich’ ship arrived, my business partners arrived, the society Elite arrived: Ministers, Army Officers with high ranks, business men, everyone, all friends and acquaintances of ours, singing, dancing and ‘Osim Sameah’ (rejoicing) together. We never left the dance floor. Edit loves to dance and till this day, dances beautifully.

2.

EDIT: Eliezer didn’t know about all my difficulties, also, he could not help. All week long he was working away from home, there were months when he arrived home only for Shabat, and when he arrived dirty and tired and exhausted, I had to make sure the girls will not disturb him. I saw that in my home, when my father came – there had to be quiet. He (Eliezer), could not have known my suffering and I didn’t talk, I didn’t tell him I was having a hard time, I thought that was life, that is it. We also could not talk much, because we had no words in the same language. Eliezer and I spoke German between us but both of us didn’t know this language well. So, we started speaking Hebrew, also for the girls. Eliezer knew Hebrew better than me, because he studied a little Hebrew in school in Greece, I learned by myself, from what I picked up in the street.

We lived in Jaffa until 1954. Shoshi was around two and a half years old, Lelik was seven. I thought the surroundings we lived in, does not fit for raising children, that the girls need to have a place to play, that some green

and space should be part of their environment, so, I told Eliezer, I will look for an apartment elsewhere.

The Girls were in ‘Gan’ (Nursery and kindergarten school), and I was free during the morning hours to search for a place.

In Jaffa there were Arab houses that I didn’t like, so I kept looking until I found one that met my demands. It was a house on the ground which had three rooms, a wide kitchen and a bathroom. It was surrounded by a big yard. It was located in Yad Eliyahu, in a new neighborhood, which was built for the Jewish Brigade of the British army, veterans. The house, was owned by a family and their elderly parents. We bought the place, but the elderly couple remained living in the third room, which had a separate entrance.

We got the other two rooms, we had no experience, so we didn’t know that the third room was also ours after the sale. We didn’t write that it in the contract, there was no one to guide us on the subject. We raised the money for buying from self-sources and loans, and moved to live in Yad Eliyahu. (Later, when the elderly couple left the room, they asked us for additional sum of money for the third room. In addition to that, we found out in a later stage, that the former owners did not finalize the selling process of the house in the ‘Administration of Israel lands’, as needed, so they never received the state acceptance for this deal. The Administration saw us as illegal tenants, and asked us to vacate the place. Only with Eliezer’s friends’ help – A ‘Mentch’ (Good man) – who had a lot of connections and was known to be of help – the matter was fixed in the ‘Administration’ and all was well again).

The girls enjoyed the new home and so did I. I loved working in the garden. In front, I planted ornamental plants and flowers, and in the back of the house, we planted ornamental trees. Eliezer installed a swing on one of these trees, and all the neighborhood children used to come to enjoy it. People who passed on the street, used to stop and admire the beautiful well-kept garden. It was truly paradise. Nice surroundings, pretty and

clean, nice neighbors, lots of children, friends to my daughters, nice home, well-kept garden, definitely a place to live, and be happy in.

Yet, the difficulties kept troubling me. It was Lea’s time to go to Elementary school. There was a school very close to us so, before registration, I went to take a look at the place. I saw all the children looked so untaken care off, that I asked myself: ‘My daughter with these children who are so neglected?’. I told the principle that my daughter doesn’t fit- in there, and that the children look so, untaken care off. He got upset at me, and told me that if this is not good enough for me, there is a different school in the city, and that I should go there, So, I did. A mother is a mother! Her child is the most precious in the world. So, I enrolled her to the distant school, the one on Levinski St., and every morning, I had to take her to school, go back home, cook, clean, wash the laundry, finish everything on time, and in the afternoon, leave everything and again, ride to pick her up. As the time past, I met a woman that her boy had also attended that school, and we agreed that one of us will take the children in the morning, and the other will bring back the children in the afternoon, and then we will switch the day after. That eased the burden a little.

After a while, a school was opened in Yad Eliyahu, close to where we lived, ‘Helen-Keler’ school for disabled children, and I moved Lelik, to that school. She had a hard time in school. She had difficulty in learning how to read. I used to sit with her at home and teach her the basics, the grammar of the letters, but that wasn’t the main problem: it was a mental problem. She suspected everyone and cried constantly. I tried to calm her down but children are cruel, they see a weaker child, and they become cruel to them. So, the more Lea, was dressed nicer – it became worse, because they also envied her. She suffered and I suffered! I didn’t know how to help her, I went to the school and tried helping through volunteering, and I brought presents for the other children but nothing helped. I didn’t know what is happening to my girl, nor did the doctors. A very known professor who checked her said her ‘Thyroid gland’ isn’t functioning, and gave her medicine to enhance the Thyroid gland activity. Lea took the medicine without complaining, but it didn’t help. We were referred to the hospital with her, and comprehensive tests were held, at the

end the doctors called us and dismissed the former Professor’s diagnosis, they determined that the child has an intellectual disability. That was the first time we heard the word ‘Pigur’ in Hebrew. I didn’t understand the significance deeply. The doctors explained the problem as if, I should have understood the consequences, just from the word: ‘Pigur’.

ELIEZER: At that time, our group (company) ‘Hamerim’, worked in one of the most important projects of the state of Israel – placing the line Yarkon-Negev. This project was a system of water transport, from the Yarkon river, to the Negev desert (in the south of the country). It started from the springs of the village, Rosh-Haayin, all the way to Kibbutz Magen, in the Negev. We transported over a hundred kilometers of pipes, who brought life to the Negev. The prime minister, Levi Eshcol, said then, that “The pipes are the vanes of the country”. (Levi Eshcol was prime minister in the late 60’s of the 20th century).

Two years after we moved to Yad Eliyahu, in the year 1956, a war broke out, the Sinai war, also known as: ‘Mivtza Kadesh’, when Israel went to war with Egypt, with the support of Britain and France. Before the war broke, our group was called to come to Sirkin army camp. We were not allowed to leave the camp or be in touch with the outside. We were given food and shelter and we were busy, day and night, unloading ‘Sherman’ tanks, spare parts and ammunition that the French sent to Israel. We worked around the clock. The money we earned, we invested in better, and new equipment, and the little left, we took home. We never complained. Edit and I, were always satisfied not having much. We saved every penny we could. Up to this day we stop ourselves, we have breaks in us, too much ruins the good.

EDIT: Eliezer, did not feel that suffering I felt. He was not home all day. Up to this day he doesn’t understand what I went through. He left in the morning and when he came back at night, the girls were already in bed. Only when Lea was Ten years old, he understood there is a problem. He

spoke to her and she used to say: “Yes, yes, Daddy, everything will be Ok” but nothing really changed.

Shoshi on the other hand, was a normal regular kid. From a very young age, she fit well in kindergarten, loved animals, loved playing with the other children and was loved by them. She always had many friends.

Before Purim, I used to sew the costumes that everyone admired. Lea didn’t want to participate, didn’t want to put on the costume. Sometimes, I managed to persuade her, once I made a nurse costume for her, and another time a costume of a Chinese girl, and she looked very nice. Before Purim there was a party at home. The costume making took a lot of work, patience, and measurements, but it felt like a party at home. Everyone helped. Eliezer, also helped a lot, he loved those things. We were happy. Beside the suffering, there were moments of happiness. Once I sewed for Shoshi the outfit of Sonja Henie – she was a famous Hungarian Ice skater. Same as what my sister wore, my sister’s outfit was in red, and I sewed the outfit from Green Corduroy: a ‘Cloche’ dress, short in its rim, and around the neck, white fur. Also, a white fur hat for her head, the shoes we covered with a green corduroy cloth, and tied it with a long shoelace all the way down to her calf. (years later, I sewed the same costume for my granddaughter Michal). Shoshi was very successful with all her costumes, once she was a star in the night, and once a black tiger with gold. The Idea for the tiger costume came to me, when we visited Eliezer’s friends. As we were speaking about Purim costumes, I suddenly saw a blanket which was just laid out there, one side of it was black and the other speckled. I suggested to my friend, that a costume can be sewed from this blanket, two costumes, one for each of her girls, one black tiger and one speckled. I suggested that her son, should have a circus trainer costume. She did sew that, and I sewed for Shoshi and we walked down the street with three tigers and a trainer. Her son that was dressed as a trainer of the tigers, held the ‘animals’ in chains and everybody was impressed. It was an attraction.

Another time, I sewed for Shoshi a costume of a demon, a black demon (I always had extraordinary ideas). I dressed her with tight tricot all over her body, I attached two horns to her hair bow, and Eliezer’s job was to make

a wooden fork and dye it in black. We went to the hall where the costume competition was taking place, and my daughter won first prize, and received a big bed with a doll, all because it was an original costume. All the other girls were dressed with long beautiful dresses, but Shoshi’s costume was an original and she was very happy. We were happy as well.

Besides the difficulty of dealing with Lelik – we were happy. I did not let this problem shade our lives. I dealt with her, but did my best for our home to be an open home and a happy one. On weekends, we hosted a lot of friends. We had a long porch and a wide lot around the house, and Eliezer’s friends, came with their families. The Children had a wide space to play and go wild, and we – the adults, had a nice time, eating, laughing, drinking, dancing and playing music. We had a friend who sang beautifully, and another friend who accompanied her in playing the guitar, and when the recorders arrived in Israel, we were among the first ones who had a recorder so, I recorded the friends, and then played it for them to hear. That was a source of excitement and laughter. People loved to come visit, loved my cooking. There was always a lot of food and a good fun environment.

When Lelik reached Bat-Mitzva age, I arranged a feast in her honor at our house yard. I invited about 30 friends with their children, made food for everyone, (up to this day, I have no idea how I managed all that by myself)

– grilled meat, salads, pastry and cakes. Our friends ‘licked their fingers’, sang, played music and there was a lot of joy.

We also celebrated Shoshi’s Bat-Mitzva, at home. Before the party I organized the children of the neighborhood, and we put up a show where the children showed their talents in singing, playing an instrument, acting or dancing. We opened a partition between the living-room, and the bed room, so in one room was the ‘stage’ and in the other, sat all the guests to view the show. It was a special Bat-Mitzva party, and it was ‘the talk of the day’ in the neighborhood – the performance, the food and the great joy and fun – long after it ended.

We knew how to be happy, sing, dance and have fun and we took advantage of every opportunity to do that.

Lelik finished Elementary school and started studying in a two-year school, where she learned how to sew. The classes were over, each day at 4 pm, and that was good but, also there not a day passed, with her not crying. She felt everyone is hearting her, this one said that, and the other one said that, so I said to her: “Lelik, why do you pay attention to that? this is how children behave, they upset each other, when they see you crying, they try to upset you more”, but that didn’t help. “Ok, Ima, ok” she said, but the next day, the same thing happened. She suffered and so did I. Luckily, I’m strong, I could suffer at home and pretend outside. Our lives went-on, we were better off financially, we received compensation (from Germany), the group (Eliezer’s company with the friends) earned well and we were considered, ‘high society’ of that time. There were balls we were invited to, and the whole group went. I couldn’t say I am not going because of my child, I wanted to hide the fact that my daughter was different. Like any mother. No one likes people saying: ‘she has a different child, not regular…’ On Saturdays, we all went to the beach, we are all swimmers and I taught her how to swim, how to ride a bicycle, but she was not like others, she (Lea), could not enjoy the things we enjoyed.

3.

ELIEZER: Edit, for me is the key to everything. I never felt I wanted to ‘hijack’ the world. Just to work and enjoy life. In 1964, we travelled to visit Hungary and Greece. This was the first time we left the country since we arrived as refugees, nineteen years earlier. We placed the girls with friends and left. We visited Edit’s family in Hungary, her brothers and sisters. They lived in a Communist country and their life conditions were accordingly. We could not leave them money, but we brought presents and we bought things for them there, things they could not afford. Although I could not speak Hungarian, with them, Edit translated and we connected this way.

After that, we travelled to Greece. I showed Edit the places where I grew- up, and wept. The house was no longer there, instead there were train tracks, there was no trace left. We met friends but no one from my family,

remained alive. How different we were, Edit and I. How each of us left our homeland, versus, how we came back. We left as refugees and came back financially and socially established people. Since then, we travelled another three or four times.

EDIT: The family could not believe. I left home with one article of clothing and now, I brought each one of them presents, and our money had worth. For a lunch, we paid a sum equal to 10 shekels. We spent two weeks in Hungary, and one week in Greece. In Hungary, we rented an apartment very cheap, and since Eliezer didn’t want to eat out much, I had to cook (in every trip we used to rent an apartment, and I had to cook. He learned to go to the market to buy the groceries, and I cooked). Eliezer got to know all my brothers and sisters, and they got aquatinted with him, he felt part of the family. They couldn’t speak to one another, but I translated. It seemed like, I, who left Hungary to my siblings’ dissatisfaction, was the one who achieved a better, established life, more than all of them.

In the year 1966, I invited my big sister, Rozzi, to visit the country. She had a great time here, was very impressed with what we founded here with our own hands. I bought clothes for her, and I dyed her hair in my salon, and she went to Hungary, looking a few years younger than the Rozzi who arrived here. She would have been happy to stay in Israel, but she could not leave her family in Hungary. I also invited my brother Feri, to come visit the country. He arrived after the six-day war. We travelled with him all over the country: we visited Jerusalem, the dead sea, the Kineret, we even went to Sharm El-Sheikh, with him. (in the Sinai desert that we occupied from Egypt). He was very impressed with everything he saw, and I think that at one point, he was sorry he didn’t come to live in Israel, to build his life here. As long as my brothers and sisters were alive, I sent them, from time to time, parcels full with good things from our country, and I was very happy I could help them.

Lelik finished her studies in the sewing school, and we needed to find her a job, she could not stay at home. If she would have read something, showed interest in something, it would have been ok for her to stay home,

but two women at home all day, that is a recipe for fighting. I said to her: “Let’s go to the work agency, and look for work, you know how to sew a little, they will let you do little uncomplicated things”. She didn’t say no, so we went. In the work agency, they referred us to several places. We went to one, and met with the manager, I told him the child has just finished school, she knows how to sew a little, not much, and he accepted her. I left her there and went. The manager, took Lelik into the hall where all the employees sat and worked. Naturally, all the employees turned their heads to look at her, as happens with any new person who arrives, but for her, it wasn’t natural and she started crying and didn’t stop as long as she was there. In the evening, she arrived with her eyes swollen from all the crying, didn’t want to eat nothing, just to sleep. I asked her what happened and she said that everyone started laughing at her. She refused to go back there. We tried a few more working places, but she could not stay in any of them more than a few days. My situation was horrible. I could not sleep at nights, and during the days I was troubled all the time thinking, what will happen to Lelik. It was hell. I felt my heart is jumping out of its place, all I wanted is to get into bed and sleep. But I could not afford that, I had to work, there is a husband who is coming back from work, there is Shoshi who needs attention as well, there is a home to take care of, I didn’t know what to do and felt lost.

I asked Eliezer what to do, but he too, did not have an answer. A mother is a mother. She bares all the sorrow, what could he say? He went to work “Do what you think”, he said to me. I said to Eliezer that in my opinion this child will not know how to work anywhere, so I must start a business where she can help – clean, sweep, do things that don’t require too many skills. She can’t just, sit at home, it will only bring anger and bitterness. I started looking for small businesses in the newspaper, asked around, and showed interest. I thought of opening a restaurant, because I am good at cooking, and I love cooking, and then I found out that a hair-salon is for sale. The owners were a couple in their 40’s, who decided to leave the country and start a new life abroad. I asked Lelik, if she would like us to take that hair-salon, where she could help me and the hair dressers, she really liked the idea. For two weeks, I went to see how the hair-salon operates and after I checked and learned a little – I learned how to wash

the clients’ hair, how to roll their hair with ‘rolls’, where to buy hair colors and the other materials and accessories, and I also learned, about the other issues in running a hair-salon (since I had no idea in that field) – after all that, I decided to buy the hair-salon, with all its content. It was a 1.5 rooms apartment, in the ground floor, on Israelis St., near Disengof St. The location, was wonderful but not too many clients. I could not take much time to debate this with myself, because I needed to start something, in order for my daughter to have a place to work in, some occupation. I searched for a hair dresser. I can’t remember how I found Shoshana, the hair dresser, I didn’t even see how she works before I employed her, but I believed in her, I thought she was ok. She was a young woman who just got married, and was willing to work as much as needed. I agreed with her the terms of employment, and we decided she will start working on Sunday. I didn’t yet tell her about Lea. I hired another hair dresser who specialized in special hair-doo’s. She lived close. So, that was that, and we started our venture.

My working day started very early in the morning – Eliezer took Lea, and me, into Tel-Aviv, on his way to work – and ended in the evening. Shoshi stayed home alone. I did prepare her food before I left to the hair-salon, so she will have something to eat when she comes back from school, but there was no longer anyone to greet her, when she returned from school. Shoshi sometimes says, I was hard on her, but she did not see clear. I could take her with me to the hair-salon so she will learn the business but I didn’t want to. I wanted her to study. Maybe she’s right. I had no time, I was busy with Lea.

In her first years in school, Shoshi, was a very good student, understood reading and writing fast and excelled in everything. In the higher grades she became friends with children that didn’t find learning important, she started neglecting her studies and just enjoying her time with her new friends. The results came fast. Again and again, she failed her tests, her grades lowered and the teacher kept calling me, but I didn’t succeed in preventing her from hanging-out with these friends, especially, since I was busy in the hair-salon all day, and wasn’t home since her last year in Elementary school. Shoshi was a little lost, there was no one to supervise

or to limit her. The neighbors complained there is noise in the house, Shoshi’s friends were happy there, in a home without parents looking over their shoulders, so they came and made noise, and we had no way to prevent it.

Shoshi was about to finish elementary school and since she had low grades, she was not accepted into the city high school, and we debated what to do. One of those days, her teacher called me and said that in the Kfar-Hayarok, there is a boarding school who accepts intelligent children, who have low grades. The children study both agriculture and the regular topics for the final exams. I consulted Eliezer, he thought the idea was good and so, I proposed the possibility to Shoshi – to study in the ‘Kfar- Hayarok’ (Boarding school), I said to her: “I wanted you to attend a regular high school but they wouldn’t accept you, not because you are not smart, but because all your wild behavior with that friend who ruined you. Here you have a chance to get your final high school certificate, and that will enable you to learn in university if you like, you will be able to move on, and everything will be opened for you”. She agreed. I was so busy with Lea that I didn’t ask Shoshi enough, if she is ok. We visited her every week and ate lunch with her, it seemed like the child is satisfied, she asked her father to bring her a dog, and Eliezer brought her a dog, and a dog- house, so he will have a place to be. We were sure the child is very happy. There was no other way, she needed to study. We were part of a social Elite, so we were a little snobbish, and we felt uncomfortable that my daughter isn’t continuing to the city high school, like everyone else. I was a little ashamed, but there was a high level of studying in the Kfar- Hayarok as well.

My plan for Lea did not succeed. Lea didn’t fit-in. When we asked her to wash the clients’ hair, she wet them, if I asked her to help Shoshana roll some rolls, she just stood there, staring into space. Most of the time, she stood in-front of the big mirror that covered the wall, looking at the clients, to see if they are talking about her, or laughing at her. The hair-salon thrived, I knew how to treat the women who came in, I gave them a cup of coffee, I had conversations with them, and so happened, that more and more customers arrived and our hours prolonged. The trips from Yad-

Eliyahu to Tel Aviv and back exhausted Eliezer, and me. Eliezer would come after work, sit and eat something in the kitchen and wait until I finished work. We could not withstand it. We decided to leave Yad- Eliyahu, the good nice house with the beautiful yard I nurtured, and find an apartment close to the hair-salon. In-front of the hair-salon, on 20 Israelis St., there was an apartment for sale on the third floor, 2.5 rooms flat. I went to see it and told Eliezer, this will be good for us, you can come back from work and rest at home, I can come up from time to time to prepare the food and life will be easier.

We sold our house and bought the apartment. I didn’t have any other solution, we moved in one day. In the morning all our furniture and belongings from the house in Yad-Eliyahu were moved, and in the evening, everything was already in its place in our flat in Tel-Aviv.

For a moment, things seem to be working out on the best side. ‘Hamerim’ group expanded and they received more and more projects all around the country. Eliezer arrived from work, bathed, ate, rested, and I also didn’t need to wait. We were young and could climb 3 stories, Shoshi was in the Kfar-Hayarok and seemed satisfied, the hair-salon reputation preceded it, and we were swamped with work. Shoshana was a good and fast hair- dresser, the other hair-dresser, knew how to do very pretty stylish hair- doo’s, and I washed clients’ hair and helped with the hair dye, even Lea helped here and there to clean and sweep, especially after the hair-salon got empty from clients.

4.

EDIT: Fridays, were the busiest days. From seven in the morning clients arrived to the hair-salon, waiting for it to open. This one wants color, this one a haircut, another a hairdo, and they are all in a hurry, and there were many of them: “I was first, no, I came first” they argued. One of these Fridays, when the hair-salon was full of women, I suddenly felt bad. I felt my heart is pounding fast, felt weakness in my legs and felt I was about to die. I collapsed. I lay down on the bed in the half room, and Eliezer

came and called a doctor. The doctor checked me and found out that my blood pressure was very high. “If you don’t stop working, Lady” He said, “if you don’t slow down – you might die”.

I didn’t know what to do. There was a lot of work at the hair-salon, and in addition to that, I had a lot of work at home. If I need to slow down – I need to give up the work in the hair-salon. What shall I do with it? Lea didn’t know what money was, didn’t know how to give money, take money. Shoshana, the hair-dresser was very nice and loyal but regarding money, one, can’t know. I rested a few days at our apartment upstairs, and thought what could I do. I offered the hair-salon to the hair dresser for a fee, so I could cover the expenses but she said no. She was willing to take the hair-salon of my hands, without paying me. I convinced her to open a different hair-salon in the apartment opposite to our hair-salon and I will give her all the equipment from ours, instead of compensation money. She agreed to this offer. With sadness, I said goodbye to my clients, and closed the venue. Thinking back on that, I think I could have taken Shoshi to the hair-Salon and this way she would have not felt I neglected her, but as I said, we were snobbish, our level was high society, we were in the company of ministers and influential people, and I could not say my daughter is a hair-dresser.

I rested two, three weeks, and again, I found myself in the same place as before: Lea at home, she has nothing to do, I see her doing nothing and I get upset. Two women at home is not good. There is tension. There is anger.

After about a month, I told Eliezer I would like to open a restaurant, a restaurant of ‘home Hungarian food’, that I can do myself, I cook well, Lea can clean the tables, wash the dishes, do whatever needs to be done, without the need of being a professional, at least, so I hoped. Eliezer agreed, and I started immediately to push my plan. I bought a big mixer which was at that time, the highlight of the technological sophistication. I installed a sink in the balcony, brought six tables into the big room and started telling friends and acquaintances, that I am about to open a restaurant with home Hungarian food. I called the restaurant ‘Lyli’.

ELIEZER: The days were the waiting days before the six-day war, we were already a big company known for its excellent professionals, with big cranes which could lift loads of up to 90 ton. We were called to ‘Sarafand’ army camp, to load tanks and cannons, which were sent especially to the south of the country. The war broke on the morning of June 5th, 1967. The Israeli air force planes attacked military bases, and airports in Egypt, Jordan and Syria. Immediately after that, the activity of the ground forces started, and we followed them. We entered El-Arish, even before the fighting ended. On the ground there were still Egyptian forces, they could have killed us easily, but most of the Egyptian soldiers didn’t continue the fighting. They were spread all over, some of them dried-up and died, and some of them turn themselves in, and were taken into captivity. We loaded the tanks on train-cars which took them up North. We were working between our forces which kicked forward, and the Egyptian forces, in retreat. The Egyptians, left behind a lot of equipment for shelters and bunkers – concrete cubes and iron constructions – and we loaded those as well with our cranes, and on the transports which took them up North. Years later when they build the fortification line in the tunnel, (the Suez tunnel), – The Bar-Lev line – as a result of the ‘war of attrition’, they used this equipment to build the fortification line.

After the war, came prosperity. The army build its camps in the Sinai desert, and build the Bar-Lev line. We took part in every security activity. After the six day’s war, France had embargoed Israel and stopped all the weaponry shipments and planes to Israel. Among them, were planes which were produced especially for Israeli air force. In a special operation a model of this plane was smuggled to Israel, we brought this model with our cranes to a big hangar and there we assembled it. According to this model, the air-industry produced the ‘Kfir’ and ‘Lavi’ planes.

Close to the end of the war, Edit opened her restaurant. Edit is an ‘Eshet- Hayil’ (A very capable wife), decides and does. Decided to open a restaurant, so I helped her. Each day I went with her to the market to buy fresh vegetables, chicken, meat and everything else the restaurant needed.

People were enthusiastic about her food, they stood in line. Everyone who was someone ate at her restaurant.

EDIT: I opened a restaurant and started cooking, and wonder of wonders

– people heard about the Hungarian restaurant, came once and came back again, and brought more and more people. I cooked Hungarian food like I cooked at home: Chopped liver, Mayonnaise salad, Vegetable salad, Eggplants (I have a good recipe for eggplant), Beet, Chicken soup, kinds of Goulash – a real home cooking. We served only Lunch, not breakfast or dinner. It was a success, and as the restaurant succeeded more, the work grew and I needed help. I had a neighbor who wanted to work, I offered her to come help – clean, peel, cut, wash dishes, there was lots of work. The woman came and helped me for a 100 lira, also, she and her husband, ate at the restaurant.

I was very lucky to have succeeded in everything I did, except with anything related to my daughter, there, I had no success. Nothing worked. I would say to her: “Go serve”, No, she didn’t want to. “Remove the things from the table” – “No” she said, she doesn’t want to, she feels shy. Again, I found myself in the same situation. I thought that if I had a business, she would feel more relaxed but, she was sick and I didn’t understand. I got crossed with her, said to her: “Everything I do, I do for you”, I felt like she is ungrateful.

One of those days, a woman came to visit me, she used to be our neighbor in Yad-Eliyahu. She came with a proposal: Her son who we knew from childhood, wants to get married and is unable to meet a suitable girl. He knew Lelik, since they were kids and maybe they will be a good fit, she suggested. She asked if I agree for them to go out together? I asked Lelik, she said yes. They started dating but something I could not specifically define, bothered me. I was not satisfied, Eliezer was not satisfied as well but our Lea, had this kind of character when she got attached to someone, she stayed. The guy was weird. He did study in a regular school and served in the army and still, something seemed wrong. We never saw them hug or kiss. My daughter was so lovely, pretty and sexy and kept clinging to

him like a cat, but he stayed indifferent. I said to his mother: “I don’t see that your son is getting close to Lea, why doesn’t Yehuda embrace her? Why doesn’t he kiss her?”. “My son is not a criminal” She replied. ‘For this you need to be a criminal?’ I wondered to myself. They were engaged already. The guy and his mother pushed for a wedding. We asked Lea if she wanted to marry the guy, she said she did. The moment there was an agreement about a wedding, I decided to close the restaurant in order to clear the apartment for Lelik, and her husband. This was a small apartment, 1.5 rooms and that was good, I could supervise and see how they get along and then we’ll see. If they succeed, we will try to buy a better apartment. We bought new furniture for the living room, furniture for the bedroom, and the outcome was a nice flat to live in.

Lelik and Yehuda’s wedding, was in the ‘Rabbanut’ (The governmental Rabbinate), and after that we had a small wedding party in a hall, which we invited all our friends and acquaintances to. Lelik was weird in her wedding as well. She was shy, didn’t speak, it was awkward, I should have been happy, but I cried. The young couple went to Eilat for their honeymoon. When they returned, Eliezer fixed the guy a job in the post- office and Lea, was very happy. She tried to be a housewife as much as she could, prepared Schnitzels and begged him: “Yehudal’e, come to eat”, but the guy preferred the company of his friends. She didn’t care that they had no sex, she didn’t know. She was a child, and we didn’t know what was going on between them. It didn’t bother Lelik. She felt good and didn’t know things should be different. She only liked hugging and kissing. And although I saw the signs before, I saw but didn’t understand. I asked Lelik if something happened between them, “No, nothing, we lie in bed and he handles himself” she replied. ‘He can’t touch a woman, that was his illness’, I thought to myself. As long as Lelik is ok, what do I care that they won’t have sexual relations, so they won’t have children, the most important thing is that she will be content.

The guy had a lot of friends, they came to the apartment and started messing about with Lelik. Poor Lelik, she used to say: “Yehuda’le, tell them, tell them to leave me alone”, he said nothing and she kept begging.

One day, Shoshi came for a vacation, from her school, from the Kfar- Hayarok, and went to visit Lelik. She opened the door and saw a very alarming sight. She saw the guys carrying Lelik to the bedroom, one more minute and they would have raped her. The guys noticed Shoshi standing in the entrance, left Lelik and ran away.

Shocked Shoshi, came and told me what happened. I phoned his mother immediately, and told her this cannot go on. I didn’t care he was not manly, but the fact that his friends are in the apartment and might rape Lelik, was not acceptable! We went to the Rabbinate and just said that he is not a man, and they gave the ‘Get’ immediately. (The Jewish divorce certificate).

Lelik stayed alone in the apartment and said she wants to get married again. She used to go for walks on Dizengoff St., and always met someone. Once she met this guy who sold flowers, a nice guy, she brought him home and he brought more friends. Neighbors told us that guys come to Lelik’s apartment, and she goes out in the evenings. I could not supervise her all the time, so when we heard that, we told her she could not stay alone in the apartment. I told her to go up to our home, back to her old room, and for the time-being, I closed her apartment. We were back at the same place, again with the same problem.

I didn’t want to stay home all day with Lelik, I wanted to do something. I went down to her apartment and started to sew and accept sewing repairs. I, sewed all my clothes, I knew how to sew, I was lucky, I was given small repairs, and in the meantime, also attended a course, where they taught dressmaking patterns. I knew how to take sizes, how to draw, make shapes on paper and cut, so I planned to buy fabrics, sew clothes according to patterns and sell. The course took three months and the teacher said, I could work as a cutter, but I wasn’t sure.

I had a neighbor who worked in confection as a main cutter, and she proposed I go work in the factory, she works in. She eased my hesitations, and I started working in the confection factory on Alenbi St., as a cutter. I worked there for a short time because after a short while, they closed the factory.

I sold the apartment in a loss price, after I could not find a suitable renter and didn’t meet the monthly payments.

5.

EDIT: Three years Shoshi studied in the Kfar-Hayarok, one day, in the middle of her third year, she told us she wants to leave the Kfar. We were unable to convince her to tell us the true reason why she wants to leave. Later we found out that her best friend and her, had a quarrel, it’s not clear what and why but Shoshi decided, she is leaving high school, coming home and enlisting to external studies’ school for ‘Bagrut’ (the certificate of final exams at the end of high school). No persuasions helped. Shoshi was determined. She left the Kfar-Hayarok, to our big sorrow, and enrolled for external studies, for final exams with the aim of becoming a nurse.

She registered into nursing school in Ichilov hospital. Later, a friend of ours that worked as an executive in Ichilov hospital at that time, said Shoshi is very suitable to this profession and if she continues the progress, she will be an operation-room nurse, because she has light hands.

At her free hours, Shoshi spent with her good friend from Elementary school, Nili. Together they hang-out in dancing clubs located in hotels and in one of them, she met a red hair guy with blue eyes, Kalman Belachsan, who will be her husband later on.

Kalman was a soccer player at that time, in Petach-Tikva team, and for a living, he worked with his father in a factory which made stairs. (at that time soccer players did not receive big amounts of money for their performance).

Shoshi and Kalman fell in love and became a couple.

In the meantime, Lelik, who stayed alone after her divorce, wanted to get married again. We also wanted her to get married. We were scared she is running around in the streets alone, it was impossible to keep her only at home so, we approached a matchmaker and she brought a nice looking,

tall guy, from an Iraqi decent, to a first meeting in our house. He came with his brother. Both young men were dressed very meticulous and made a good impression. Lelik and the guy fell in love with each other and started dating. These were the last, best months in her life. Yakov, (that was the guy’s name) loved Lelik very much. He used to look at her with admiration and call her: “My beauty queen” and she melted. Within a short period of time, they decided to get married. We bought them a 2.5 rooms apartment on Pinsker St., & the corner of Bugrashov St. We furnished the house and fixed it so it looked like a fairy-tail apartment. I thought: ‘Here one must be happy’. The wedding took place in a nice hall, a beautiful wedding. I sewed Lelik’s ‘Hupa’ dress and also, I made Shoshi and my, dresses.

Happiness and sorrow mixed together, because Lelik did not feel comfortable around people and she walked with her head down. Still, the friends and music, created happiness. A short period of time after Lelik’s marriage, Shoshi announced that Kalman and her, want to get married. Shoshi was young, she wasn’t even nineteen yet, so I thought it would be the right thing to wait a while. Eliezer stood by her and so, Shoshi got married. We bought them a small apartment in north Tel-Aviv, in Deaz St. It was a neglected apartment, with 1.5 rooms and a large balcony, situated in the ground floor of that building. The living room was quite big, so we broke walls and redecorated the flat. We took out the kitchen and bathroom and located them in the balcony, and still had room on this large balcony, for a small extra room. We created a big hall at the entrance, and the apartment became amazing – ‘Bonbonierra’ (like a chocolate box in Edit words). I installed drapes on the windows, we bought a rug and furniture for the living room, a true ‘Love nest’.

When Shoshi got pregnant, the apartment became small, then we went to look for a bigger flat. We found the one on Pinkas St., a ground level apartment with only a few stairs to reach it. There too, we did a big renovation, we attached the balcony to the living room and thus, made the living room bigger. There was a half room for a bed room, and we broke walls to enlarge the kitchen. We closed the balcony with windows and I

placed a heavy red cloth drape, bought a hairy green rug, and it became an apartment like in the movies, they were happy there.

Half a year after the wedding, Shoshi’s husband and four other partners, bought together a piece of land, on which they build a two stories office building, and later they earned their living from the rent.

I thought I have arrived at my peace and quiet. Both my daughters were married, both had an apartment, it all looked promising. But Lelik’s marriage, unfortunately, did not succeed. She was afraid of sex. Her husband complained she is fighting him all the time. They managed one year of good marriage but the guy started understanding, who he is married to. She was not a women like others. She was juvenile. He liked to have fun but she couldn’t stand people. Her head was always down around people, and she thought people are talking about her. Their lives started growing bad. He scared her, he didn’t understand she was actually a child, she needed him to help her, not to demand things from her. He was strict and demanded she will fulfil her duties as a wife, and a home maker, he wanted the house to be clean, that the rug will be strait, and so on. Lelik, didn’t care about those things.

I helped as much as I could. I went shopping with her at the market, and every weekend they came to eat at our house. As time passed, I saw decline in Lelik, she never told us what he did to her, she said nothing. “it’s ok”, she answered to our questions. He was a nice guy, the problem was in my daughter, today I know she had a mental problem, still, he said nothing about divorce. I saw my child is not talking to the point. At nights she was wondering the streets, I felt she was not ok. I said to him: “Yakov, this is not the same Lea you took as a wife, you are not getting along, you must divorce”. He agreed, and they divorced immediately. Each one of them returned to their Parents’ home, and we closed the apartment. (later we sold it).

Unfortunately, my daughter needed to be admitted to a psychiatric hospital. She was hospitalized for two weeks, got treatment and medication. and was released home, but her fears and anxiety attacks, remained. She didn’t have these panic attacks before her marriage. Lelik

was then, twenty-Six years old. I didn’t know what to do any more, I was lost, she could not have been left alone at home, and I could not stop my life to stay with her.

6.

The Psychiatrist lady who took care of Lea, recommended she will be sent to ‘Kfar-Hatikva’, close to Kiryat-Tivon up north, a place designated for people who have special needs, but are still independent. The place was beautiful, looked like a Kibbutz, green lawns and small houses. A good place for someone who is independent and social. The demand for ‘Kfar- Hatikva’, was very big and only with special connections, we managed to place Lea in there. We paid a big sum of money every month, and we thought here she will find her place but my daughter felt very bad there. The place is probably good when children cooperate, but she didn’t. She did not work, she didn’t take part in social life, I know what she did, she slept during the day, and wondered at night. She could not stand on her own, she needed to be backed by someone, she needed support, someone to always be at her side. On the other hand, she could not get along with people, she remained alone. They placed her in an apartment alone because she didn’t get along with any one, and they left her be.

At the beginning, I thought she is ok there because she never complained, she never said: “Ima, I am suffering here, I want to go home”. We visited her every Saturday but as time passed, we saw her suffering. She cried a lot, she had no friends and no one paid attention to her, not even the lady guides. One Winter-day, I decided to go visit her in the middle of the week. I took the bus from Tel-Aviv to Haifa, and from there to Kiryat-Tivon. The travel wasn’t easy and from the bus station to the entrance of the ‘Kfar- Hatikva’, there was a long way to go on foot. I walked, it was cold and the rain didn’t stop. Through the ‘rain screen’, I saw a figure sitting on a bench at the entrance of the Kfar, I got close and had a shock – Lelik. Lelik was sitting alone on a bench at the entrance to the Kfar, crying. She was soaking wet. The rain was dropping down from her hair, on to her face, and got mixed with her tears. She looked like a little lost child. Her look

touched my heart so much, I embraced her and said: “Come on, let’s take some things, we will leave the rest, and let’s go home”, I could not leave her there. I noticed that no one is paying attention to her, no one is checking what she is doing, no one watches if she eats, and her mental and physical condition was very poor. I took her hand in mine, and we walked over to management offices, where I told them: “Look where and how I found my girl, why isn’t she working? why isn’t she in a program? why aren’t you checking where she is at?”

That very same day I brought her home. I nurtured her until she was back to her usual strength, and then the same problem returned, she was ok, looking normal but stuck at home, and that was very hard. I had to look for a solution by myself, because I had no one to consult with.

7.

I didn’t know what to do with my sadness, I had to occupy myself. I bought a knitting machine made by ‘Brother’, and with endless patience, I started learning how to work the machine. Again, and again the machine operated and Eliezer, would get upset and say: “I will throw the machine to the garbage. I can’t stand that you are doing this for hours”. Eventually, I got the hang of it, and the expertise, and learned how to use it well.

At that time there was a shop for sale in-front of our building, on Gordon St., I bought it at ‘Key money’ arrangement. (That means only partly payment, and the rest through rent payments until completion). We fixed the shop nicely. Eliezer and his friends helped, we placed shelves and boxes, and created a nice little store for children clothing. I went to wholesalers, and bought some children items and on a separate rack, I placed knitted clothing I made. I brought my knitting machine to the store, and Shoshi drew a nice sign: MIMI. (My granddaughter, Shoshi’s daughter’s name is Michal so we called the store ‘MIMI’) and I opened the shop for clients.

When there were no shoppers in the store, I sat in the store and knitted, mainly Children clothes, but also outfits for me. To my big surprise, it worked. I knitted small, wonderful items: Cloche, bell shaped skirts with an upper part, blank skirts, shorts, dresses and blouses; clients came in and were exited. I knitted children clothing according to clients’ orders, people took orders as presents for children abroad. (I had a client who was an artist, a painter, who ordered clothing for her grandchildren in France. She gave me a painting in return), the store and the clothing became a story of success.

Shoshi’s daughter Michali, was born in January 1972, and by then she was at the age, to enter nursery school. So Shoshi came to help me in the store. I taught her how to knit on the machine, and we bought her another machine so, at her home she specialized in knitting bathing-suits – bikini and full bathing-suits. She was very talented and all the girls in the ‘Gordon pool’, ordered bathing-suits from her, all ‘Gordon pool’ was Shoshi’s bathing-suits, me too, her husband too, all the children and my husband, as well.

Eliezer suffered ‘Lumbago’ (acute lower back pain) due to his hard physical work, and all the carrying. The doctor advised swimming and exercising, so we bought a subscription to Gordon Pool, and every day we got up at five in the morning, go to the pool, swim and go back home. Then I would prepare his breakfast, gave him sone sandwiches for the rest of the day, and we each left for our job.

Shoshi became an expert in bathing-suits, and her name was becoming very well known. Up to this day people still look for her. I specialized in children clothing. I knew how to knit also for adults, but it was not worth it financially. When working at the store, I could be in touch with our apartment. Lea was home, cleaning a bit, washing some dishes and then she came down. I thought she will help, but – no, she stayed a child. At least we were not together all day. Shoshi and I, worked together until she got pregnant again. After she gave birth, she didn’t come much to the shop. At the beginning, she would come to the store with the baby-stroller from her home, in Pinkas St. She helped as much as she could, but when the child grew and started crawling, she couldn’t help at the store anymore

and suggested, she will work only from home. The shop was a big success. There were times I couldn’t meet the demand, and I hired a woman who knitted according to orders, at her home. I worked around the clock. I also learned how to ride a ‘Vespa’ (scooter of those times), so I could get faster, from place to place. I had to ride to buy strings, and all other materials and merchandise, for the store. I had to shop around, to see what is fashionable in other stores, to see what the children are wearing. There were two boutique shops in Ramat-Gan, which sold my clothing, so I had to get there to bring them merchandise, and with the ‘Vespa’ I could get everywhere, without parking problems.

After Shoshi gave birth and could not help me in the store anymore, I found it hard to manage everything by myself. Every time I had to leave the store for errands, I had to close the store. I couldn’t even go to the bathroom. At that time, children fashion started changing, it became similar to adults’ fashion. Confection started sewing for children just like for adults, and it was a big success. That made the demand for my knitting drop. With heavy heart, I decided to close the shop and sell it.

I sold the store and even though I had succeeded, the bottom line was we lost.

8.

Shoshi moved to a different apartment.

The municipality had advertised, that a new list of new apartments for young couples, in Ramat-Aviv Gimel’ on Achimeir St., will be available to those who register and found eligible. Eliezer pushed them to register, and so they did. One of the terms to get into the list was that the couple does not own an apartment, Shoshi and her husband therefore sold their flat in Pinkas St. and moved into a three-room apartment on Achimeir St., in Ramat-Aviv Gimel. Shoshi’s husband, was not satisfied with the apartment. They lived on the first floor, and the neighbors were always gathering just under their window, so they sold the apartment and moved into a five-room apartment in a new neighborhood being built by

Rubinstein. We sold our apartment on Gordon St., as well. We were aging, and on that street, there wasn’t comfortable parking, so Eliezer had to carry the heavy bags from the market a long distance, from the place he found parking. We searched for an apartment in a different place, and saw an advertisement in the newspaper about an apartment being sold on Tagor St. In Ramat-Aviv. We went there, saw the apartment fitted our needs, and bought it.

Shoshi at that time, started getting tired with not having any occupation, so she started volunteering in a kindergarten, not far from where they lived. Shortly after, she was employed there as a kindergarten teacher, even without having learned the trait. Shoshi is the right type of personality, to be a kindergarten teacher: she draws wonderfully, she knows how to tell a story and she gets along with children. She worked as a kindergarten teacher for a few years, and then she was asked to be the manager of a nursery school for children, at the ages of one to Three. There, she was responsible for ten caregivers, that took care of about a hundred infants. Here also she did very well, and was praised for her work. That kept her occupied from morning hours until the evenings, due to parents’ meetings, caregivers’ meetings, education programs she attended and more.

After two years, she felt it was too much to try and manage all this, together with being a mother full time and a home maker, and she decided to leave this job. She still receives requests to come back until this day, but she is already in a different place in her life. At the period, while Shoshi was working as a kindergarten teacher, she heard about a place of work for people with disabilities. Lelik, then joined that place, which occupied these people for half a day. She had a hard time there, but still kept going. She always cried and claimed people said this and that to her. I kept telling her not to pay attention but it didn’t help. After a while this place was closed, and the workers were moved to different place located far from there. It was kind of a day care-center, for disabled people, on King George St., where they were occupied with jobs like sorting screws, light sewing of different items, which were then put-out for sale. Lea rode the bus independently. I guided her how to get to her day care-center, and

she was ok. From time to time, I came to volunteer there, to help, so they will treat her nicely but Lea, like Lea, did not get along with anyone, and did not create any contacts. A few years past, and Lea kept being there and stayed until, 4 pm. every day, and that enabled me to have some time to myself, and to be with Shoshi and the grandchildren, but then, Lea’s, day- center moved again, to a different location. It was wonderful there, they had parties and celebrated holidays, but Lea, didn’t feel good there, she was never pleased anywhere. She did have a good friend there, one she liked, but if that friend spoke with someone else, it affected Lea’s mood for the worse. I spoke with the girls there, everyone liked me, but they didn’t like her. There were always fall-outs with her. One day, I heard of a hostel in Tel-Aviv, but Lea would not join because there was one girl she didn’t like at all. I tried to convince her that this place is close, and I could come over for a visit every day, but she remained firm in her refusal to join the hostel. We were told that there is another hostel in Ramla, so we drove there to check the place. It looked clean and nice, and Lea agreed and checked in. The disabled people who lived there worked there, cleaned their own rooms, took turns doing chores. Lea would not do anything. At the beginning it was ok and she also made a friend there, but that too, broke down and she suffered tremendously but of course, did not say she wants to come home.

I visited her in the hostel often, and sometimes she came home for vacations, weekends mostly. In the weeks she knew she is about to go home at the weekend, her excitement was so high, that she did not sleep nights, got up early, made noise and bothered others. At home it was the same. It was not easy before those weekends that Lea was about to come. I too, did not sleep at nights, I used to stand in the kitchen, praying that the visit will pass well. Those years were very hard. Only I knew how much I was suffering. Many times, I had hard thoughts: ‘Why did I not die in Lager, I was so close to death and then woke up. For what? For this life?’

From my conversations with Shoshi, I learned that she lived years in anxiety. She was worried what will happen, if anything happened to me,

her mother. She was worried what then will become of her, and Lea. She was worried what will become of her father.

Now, in recent years Shoshi speaks of that, but before she never used to share her thoughts. Now we get to speak like two girlfriends, we have good relations now. She talks about the years we sent her to study in the Kfar-Hayarok. She said that back then, she felt like we were trying to get rid of her, all our attention was directed at Lea.

After Shoshi got married, we used to travel abroad on vacation once a year, and Lelik, stayed with Shoshi. Shoshi now revealed that Lea suffered a lot in these days, because Shoshi didn’t let her do what she wanted. Shoshi explains that it was a challenge: “I needed to understand what Lea wants, but could not let her wonder about, because she used to disappear or bring home strangers, so, I followed her, all the time, and eventually, I would give her money to sit in a café, so she would have something to do”.

In the meantime, Lea was living in the hostel in Ramla. In retrospect, we learned that this hostel was like death to people like Lea. She was given pills all the time, because of breakdowns she experienced, and they used to change her pills many times. I know that, because when she came home, I saw her swallow pills that were not hers. They gave her the wrong pills and she took them. One day I heard her coughing very loudly, like dog barking. I took her to the doctor, and the doctor checked and said her lungs were fine but sent her to get an X-ray. Then we learned her heart was not ok, one of the heart’s Valves, was widely open. She was sent for a thorough examination, in Belinson hospital. She was taken to an ultrasound check, and I was standing there and saw the open valve. It is unclear how she lived with it, but the doctor said she doesn’t have long to live.

I took her out of the hostel, and brought her home. I tried to get her back to the job she did, in King George St. but she did not get along there. Two and a half years passed, and she lost a lot of weight, and was looking ill. She took pills but still wanted to wonder about all the time, and to go here

and there. She used to go to the neighbors, and talk to them and I didn’t know. I got angry at her, and today I feel bad about that.

One Friday, in May 2000, I woke up a little later than usual because I didn’t sleep at night, I got up around 8:30 in the morning and as I walk to the refrigerator to take the milk, I see Lelik, lying on the floor. At first, I thought she was kidding, but she didn’t answer me when I asked her what she was doing. Later, we understood that she woke up early in the morning, Eliezer made her a cup of coffee, she ate a good breakfast and after that, it’s not clear what happened. When I got up and saw her on the floor, I asked her what’s happening? Are you playing? She didn’t answer because she was already unconscious. I ran to the phone, and called the rescue services (Magen David Adom). They arrived and tried to revive her for half an hour while telling me not to look…I rode in the ambulance together with Lelik to the hospital, there she was immediately connected to oxygen. I stayed all day and then the staff said: “Go home, we will call you if anything changes”. She died during the night.

At that time, Shoshi was out of the country with her husband, so Eli, my grandson, told the hospital staff to call him and not me, so he was the one who informed me, about Lelik’s passing.

After the ‘Shiva’, we moved to live at Shoshi’s apartment, I couldn’t stay in ours. Actually, one day before Lelik’s death, we were about to move into Shoshi’s apartment. She had a five-room apartment and we intended to take a care-giver for Lelik, to live with us in one of those rooms. After what happened, we just closed our apartment for six months, and moved in with Shoshi. Shoshi kept saying that at least, I was with Lelik when she passed away, she said she hoped she could go fast like that, when her time comes. Still, it was very hard for me. I knew she was sick and might die, but it is like it wasn’t present in my thoughts, I didn’t think of it because Lelik was functioning, but this was her fate. As much as her death hurts me, I say, she is no longer in this world, she was not fit for this world.

9.

Throughout all the trouble we had with Lelik, the world kept moving ahead as usual. Shoshi’s children grew up. Michali excelled in high school and later studied HR, and graduated her second degree in England. Today she is in Sarajevo, with her husband on a mission from the UN.

Eli didn’t like studying too much, but was very smart and king of his class, but didn’t like to study. He’s a genius. He has an extraordinary talent for languages, and his head works.

So Shoshi’s children got married and left home, and the apartment became too big for Shoshi and her husband. They moved into the city and today, Shoshi is managing her son’s business in Israel, while he is living in a big apartment in Hungary, and doing business there.

Eliezer and I retired. We are both over 90 years old. Eliezer will have his 94’th birthday next February, and I will be 92 in April.

Every day, after I finish my duties at home (cleaning, cooking, washing the laundry, because nothing changes), I spend my time reading books, watching movies on television (I like movies very much). We go to the pool almost every day to swim (Eliezer says, I am the queen of the pool). From time to time, I go out with Shoshi to sit in a cafe and chat calmly. My connection with Shoshi is strong, like we were two girlfriends. When I look back at my life, I can’t believe I bared all that, and yet, I look at the family we built, with a lot of satisfaction. We were very lucky to attend our grandchildren weddings with their loved ones – Eli with Maria and Michal with Daniel. We were lucky to watch the new generations continue our family – the great-grandchildren: Eitan, David, Nicole and Michael and that is our great victory. The victory over the Nazis who wanted to annihilate us, and did not succeed.

ELIEZER: All those years we were called for every complicated job, because we were known for our professionalism. We assembled the platforms in Ashdod port, we dismantled a Beer factory, and moved it to

Afula, we assembled a grinding gravel machine between the Dead-sea, and Dimona. In the ‘Yom-Kippur’ war, we were called to Ben Gurion airport (it was called Lod airport back then), in order to remove missiles that USA sent in an airlift of Galaxy plains, we moved ‘Ichilov’s hospital Operation-room’, voluntarily with no pay. There is not enough time or space to cover and describe, all the places we were at, and all the operations we were part of. In 1968, after we, all four partners in our company, understood that we have no successors, we decided to dismantle our partnership, and sell the company. We sold the cranes, each one of us received his share. We came out of this with a sum of money to enable us to live the rest of our lives with dignity, and still help our children and grandchildren. Since I retired, I spend sometime in the pool every day, exercising and swimming, walking to the pool and back, is life and health for me. I enjoyed life, learned from the ‘school of life’ that life is a wheel, and if the sky is clear, don’t be afraid of the rain. Every day Edit and I, are together, it’s a gift from heaven, and I’m grateful for it.

I am proud of the family we build, proud of Shoshi, of Kalman, of my grandchildren, and of my great-grandchildren but most of all, I am proud of my contribution to building the state of Israel and its security.

This book is Edit’s and my gift for the next generations. For they shall always remember where they came from, for they shall always remember and never forget, they are descendants of Holocaust survivors, who went through the impossible, endured all the torments of that horror, and managed to build a new life out of the ashes. This is our strength this is our power. If we are strong – you, our descendants – are too. With this strength any obstacle can be overcome.